Bereavement

I don't think that 3 years is that long compared to 48 years. It took me longer than that just to get used to being retired.
Be patient with yourself and congratulate yourself on the small advances. That sounds clichéd and a bit patronising but unfortunately most things will do.
Make use of the internet to see what is available locally. I think it is more a case of adjusting that moving on really.

ANNRAY. ....I do hope you will join us on here and put down your thoughts and feelings. There are some Lovely Ladies on here who I'm sure can help you by their empathy and understanding.

I'm so pleased TOSH that you found some blessing from your attendance at a Church.
I hope it continues..

May God Bless all on this Forum who are grieving.

I lost my husband 2 yrs ago after being with him since I was 14 and he was 16. We married in 1969. when I was 21.
I too found Sundays the worst..even if I did see any family. Everything reminds me of just how much I miss him.
A few months ago I attended a Church with my friend ( as a one off !!!).... and it changed my life. I found peace with my inner turmoil and now I look forward to Sundays and all the new friends I have made.
I still miss Phil every minute of every day ...but cope better with my grief.

Maybe you don't need to move on as such, it may be that thinking you should "move on" is stopping you being satisfied with staying where you are with your life. You're surviving, right? Eating, sleeping, keeping house? So tell yourself you can stay right where you are, as a grieving widow, still missing her husband, but into that mix you can add a little more company as that seems to be something you do know you want. I don't know how old you are or how mobile you are, but you can join your local befriending service for elderly housebound people as a volunteer, which will give you regular contact with one or more other people. Or, if you're not up to that, you could join as a recipient of the befriending!

I too was widowed last year after 63 years of marriage and I too am finding the loneliness hard to bear....I now go to the theatre who show films on sundays have a glass of wine there ,gets me through the day.

48 years is an age and could not be got over easily. My heartfelt sympathies.

Really sorry Annray.
Part of the issue is the loneliness. I attacked this problem by getting a small dog. I live in a flat. I have to walk her, and lots of folk smile, other dogwalkers chat. Don't know if that helps. Good luck

annray welcome to Gransnet.

I'm reading the book Grief Works by Julia Samuel. I bought it to learn how to help my sister who is mourning the loss of her son. The book is quite wonderful, and helped me to understand grief better. It is divided into sections that refer to losing children, siblings, partners, parents. Here's more about it, and the author:

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/mar/04/how-to-live-and-learn-from-great-loss-death

Perhaps it will help you.

Annray , just wondering what area you live in ? maybe someone here is local to you and would love to go for a cup of tea somewhere local , xx

Annray, when I was living on my own I found Sundays were the worst so I used to go to a yoga class and then have a swim. Is there any chance you could do something like that?

You were together such a long time Annray, it must be hard. Are there any support groups locally which could help. You have my sympathy

Thanks every one, just found this site, will be off now, good night to every one.
Speak soon, again I hope, I'm new to all this.

Annray

Thank you for your kind comments, haven't, seen anyone all day. That's half the problem.

It's 3years, but is still hard.

I'm sorry you are struggling with grief, annray. How long has it been since your husband died?

And me too - I wish I could help in some way - there are those on here who will be better able to support and advise you. I hope that you will find what you need here from kindly Gransnetters.

my heart goes out to you.