My beloved child

My thoughts are also with you. Try not to blame yourself. You and she battled the 'black dog' so hard for those last years but sometimes the pain of staying is just too much, in spite of all the love.
She is at rest now.

Still here for you Annie, the whole gransnet community sending love x

So pleased a solution has been found for crossing the bridge, Annie.

It will be the little things
that you will remember,
the quiet moments,
the smiles, the laughter.
And although it may seem
hard right now,
it will be the memories
of these little things
that help to push
away the pain
and bring the smiles
back again.
Remember Annie, when you confess you won't be telling God anything He doesn't know already- and He loves you anyway.

Annie, I'm so glad a solution has been found.x

How great that you have found a solution to the bridge. You have been on my mind all weekend, and in the hearts if all your GN friends. Have you managed to eat anything today?
Hope so, even if it was the dreaded supplement. Sleep tight tonight, and God bless.

Thank you all x

Yes Jangran, I have no doubts about that but I have always found confession healing , suppose because it draws a line. It was in confession after my husbands death that reading
C.S.Lewis's A Grief Observed was asked of me , I found it so healing

Oooops sorry, I have had half a carton of the dreaded supplement , some rice cakes and honey and chicken this evening Auntieflo . I see the clinical dietician Tuesday , hope she can help

I’m so glad you’ve found a way that you feel comfortable with to get to the funeral Annie. Everyone here is just rooting for you and wanting to stand with you in your sadness in whatever way we can - whether by a kind word, a prayer, sharing comforting words, an encouragement to eat, or a wish for refreshing sleep for you. You’re not alone, though I’m sure it may feel that way at times. x

Annie I've been out all day so only just catching up - I'm so pleased a solution has been found - I did wonder if perhaps they could have put a screen of some sort at the car windows but the van will work. I do hope you have a seat to sit on for the journey though - and it's not full of builders dust. One day you will be able to cross that bridge on your own but it will be in your own time when you are ready. There is no rush. Think about your dear daughter as the baby and the child when she was happy and brought love and laughter to your life - those memories and your faith will hold you up and get you through the coming days.

May God grant us a peaceful and tranquil night.??

Annie I have not experienced the loss of a child, but my parents did, when my sister was killed in a road accident. Like your daughter, she had a job where she was well known and well loved and my parents had over 100 letters of condolence, most from organisations, but all letting a personal love for her show through.

Keep all these letters. For my parents, rereading the ones they received, were reminders of how DS was loved and respected in even business matters, and brought them consolation, until they too died.

For years I could not go down the road where DS's accident happened. Fortunately it was not one I used often, but I so understand your inability to cross that bridge, especially in such tragic circumstances.

Faith is a wonderful thing Annie we don’t always get the outcome that we want, but we do get the strength to cope .
Take one day at a time, as others say.

I will use the carpenters van so no cement or cement mixer!
My brother is having it cleaned , I will cover up my clothes with a dust sheet and there is a bench in there . A garage owner has offered a place where I can get out of the van and into the car.

Sounds as if I am in the Welsh mafia doesn't it. ?

Well done annie. So glad a solution has been found. There are obviously a number of people who care about you and not just on GN. We will be with you to support you in anyway we can. x

Annie I have been reading through this thread and my heart has been aching for all that you have been through. I am so sorry for the pain you are in now, a pain that no-one should have to endure. You have so much support on GN, and it's been wonderful to see how everyone has rallied round, worrying about your sleeping, your eating, getting you over that bridge. You have some true friends here, Annie, and I'm sure many of them have been wishing they've been round the corner to come and hug you, feed you, and let you cry on their shoulder. Please accept a virtual hug from me - you won't recognise my new name, but I have been on GN for some time, so I know something of your story, and I was so shocked to hear this terrible news.
Keep posting Annie, and keep on keeping on - you will get stronger, impossible as that must seem now. I will keep you in my heart and in my prayers

Hello Bathsheba, I had a great aunt who said - if the Lord doesn't come he sends . She has been proved right, I have no idea how I would have got through these dark days without the care and support from GN, I have had to hold it together for my younger daughter, son in law and three grandchildren, here I have been allowed to be me and accepted as me, no other place but here . I am truely blessed .yes I have my faith but we all need human support , care and friendship, here I have been given all . There are no words which really express what this has meant to me thank you sounds so inadequate but they are all we have so
To all, thank you x

Hope you have a more restful night annie, x

Annie, thank you is never inadequate, especially when it's so obvious it comes from the heart. I hope you sleep tonight. Another day along the long road. God bless xx

Sending kind and loving thoughts on this new morning

annie no matter how virtual this place is, the feelings for you are genuine. Along with so many of us, you and maw are constantly in my thoughts and prayers. If that helps in any way I am so glad. Please keep posting and sharing whatever you want to. ((Huggs))

I'm sorry Annie and I fully understand the reasons for you going to your DD funeral in a van, but the thought of you huddled under dust sheets in the back of a carpenters van has made me smile.

Just wanted to say hi
So glad that you will be having a chat with the dietitian tomorrow. The right sustenance will help your energy levels and hopefully your reflux will also be taken care of quite soon.
I'm happy to see you are posting other threads,

Have physiotherapist coming this morning , help to build up wasted muscles and measured for hand strapping.

oops, here they are

Hope you get on ok annie and they give you some useful advice.