My DS2 would have been 30 tomorrow

Must be one of the worst things that can happen to you and I am deeply sorry for your loss. My younger son's best friend did the same at 21 and my son was the one to find him. He was an only child and a lovely guy. We all feel the loss as though it was yesterday. My son spends a lot of time with his parents who are quite old now. He does things for them, like their boy would have done. It was at least 35 years ago, but the feelings are still just under the surface all the time. They never leave you.

I can't imagine your heartbreak. So very very sorry for your loss.

sorry for your loss.Ive known 6 people to take their lives, one was close,its the worst pain ever, I don't know how I would cope if it was close family.There are no words really, I find some comfort in the fact that all the people I knew had a mental illness and people take their lives when they are on their own.I wish you hope and peace

So sad Phoenix and we could so easily have been in your position too. Nothing we can say can help but know that our thoughts are with you. Big hug xxx

Sending hugs phoenix, my dd was 33 when cancer took her, everyday is a battle. Just allow yourself to be sad xxxx

My heart goes out to you phoenix. Sending and hugs. xx

Pheonix...just sending love and warm hugs...x

Phoenix, it's my youngest son's 30th birthday today too. I can't even begin to imagine how you must be feeling. My sincere thoughts are with you.

I have no words of comfort for you as nothing can be enough but as a mother of sons I do send you my heartfelt love & a hug.

I hope today is full of happy memories for you sending best wishes take care ?

My thoughts are with you today Phoenix.

I'm so sad to read this, my heart breaks for you.

That's only natural - to miss him and think about what might have been. The death of one's children must be the worst pain and especially so this kind of death, which you must wonder if you could have done anything to prevent it - almost certainly not. Do treat yourself kindly today.

I empathise. My son died when he was seven and would now be 53. Not many people remember him now (apart from family obviously) but I value those who do and he is in my heart.

Oh Phoenix. So so sorry.

Sending kind thoughts today Phoenix,xxxxx

Your post made me fill up TwiceAsNice
Heartbreaking just to read yet you had to experience it.
Word are just inadequate sometimes.
?

Dear Phoenix I hope that you fill today with happy memories of your dear son ????

My thoughts are with you and other Gransnetters who have lost children.
????

Thinking of you.

Thinking of you today Phoenix, x

I've only just seen this thread and can't imagine the lives of those who've lost a child.
How brave you've had to be over the years when anniversaries come around and with that overall feeling of loss and emptiness must be indescribable.
I feel for all of you.x

My sister lost her son th same way she doesn't say much now but near his birthday she goes very quiet. She too often wonders what he would have done or how his life would of panned out. She is a brave woman like you has got on with her life but has quiet moments of reflection and I think this is like you. Bless you try and keep the good memories going and keep them with you always. Thinking of you X

‘What might have been’ is so sad. I only found your post today. I hope you survived such a heartbreaking anniversary

phoenix
I understand,my first daughter would have been celebrating her 40th last year,she didnt survive due to brain damage at birth and l wonder at how/who she would be.My second daughter like your son took her own life in 2004 and approaching her 40th birthday,people move on,but to us mums it never leaves you the wondering and the what ifs and the holes left in your life big hugs for all the mums here that are in a club we never wanted to join

So sorry Phoenix memories so bittersweet. My son would have been 39 in February this year. He died just before his 5th birthday from cancer. Not the same I know but I still remember how much he suffered at the end and miss him every day. Thoughts and prayers for you today