Gransnet forums

Bereavement

Death of my father

(5 Posts)
Granny65 Sun 14-Feb-21 23:13:03

We lost our dad at the end of 2020. On top of that I ended up in hospital with covid and have been out for two weeks now.
How do you pick yourself up? All I want to do is hibernate, looking obsessively at photos of him. I just can't be bothered to do anything. My poor husband is doing everything at home and has been a godsend while I try and get over covid. Luckily he is furloughed (well not luckily really) but he hasn't got the pressure of work to deal with too. I suppose I just have to push myself and get on with it.
I know there are a lot worse off than me, with no support network, I just needed to vent I guess.

V3ra Sun 14-Feb-21 23:24:15

Oh dear Granny65 I'd say you're doing exactly the right thing for now.
You need to grieve for your dad, you need to recuperate after Covid.
Your husband is there and able to look after you, so take your time before you worry about pushing yourself to "get on with it."

Chestnut Sun 14-Feb-21 23:35:05

When my father died I found great comfort in looking through his things, and then writing up his life story. You can use your grieving constructively by going through his life bit by bit and writing it all down. Gather any paperwork which might help and follow the story from birth to death. You will find yourself becoming immersed in his life, and when you've finished it will help give you closure.

Blossoming Sun 14-Feb-21 23:41:29

So sorry for your loss. I felt the rug had been whipped from under my feet when my kind, funny and loving father died. I have so many lovely memories and now my little grand nieces love to hear all about their great grandfather.

Deedaa Sun 14-Feb-21 23:42:14

Remember post flu depression can be awful and I expect Covid is liable to have the same effect. The added blow of losing your dad means that of course you don't feel like doing anything. You will begin to feel better with time but for now it might help if you set a specific time for sitting down with your photos and memories and when the time is over put them away and perhaps go for a walk, have a cup of tea, make lists of things to do round the house. Make sure your husband knows you appreciate his support.