Have you lost friends following bereavement?

And it isn’t only death or divorce which renders a woman alone an apparent threat. Many years ago DH spent a term in Cambridge on a schoolmaster fellowship and I received not a single invitation to a social event from people with whom we normally socialised. I have never forgotten the feeling of exclusion and have always included single friends in our social occasions (now sadly in the past). Anyone would think that parties and other gatherings were only for those entering the Ark - in twos.

Absolutely true, MayBee. I was upset that after my husband left some of my friends left too. I saw some during the day with children, but was never invited to social functions when their husbands were there. Very hurtful. A long term divorcee friend told me it is very common, and you have to make a new set of friends, and a young newly widowed friend discovered the same.
Years later at a Twinning BBQ I was talking to three husbands because I was totally excluded from the female conversation. One was a work colleague, one a school governor and one attended the same art course as me , when somebody yelled out; "look at EB talking to all the men", and the husbands were reclaimed immediately. The same woman, social secretary, told me I wasn't allowed to go to a progressive supper unless I brought a companion, so that was when I resigned from the Association, and I was a founder member.
We are not after women's husbands and we would far rather be part of a mixed group; it is insulting being regarded as some sort of predator.

No longer being part of a couple did mean I was dropped from some social occasions we would have been invited to before. No idea why. Their loss.

Not due to bereavement. But when my marriage ended I went with a divorced friend of mine to her Christmas do as she didn’t want to go alone. Now, I’ve always chatted to men and woman in social situations, as you do. But, when I went to the loo part way through the meal I said to my friend, who had been on her own for longer than me, ‘am I imagining it but do women not like it when I speak to their husbands’ and she said, ‘no, you’re not’. I found that really sad. I also remember walking round a seaside town one day and feeling that I was the only person there that wasn’t part of a couple

Yes I have lost friends but it is more me feeling sad at not being included in things anymore.
Friends we socialised with will ring occasionally but never to go for a coffee etc.
Certainly not a case of being worried about their H’s as I am a very old lady.
I can’t entertain anymore but I don’t know if they would come anymore if I could.

Definitely. I was widowed 7 months ago and already I am finding who my true friends are.

I received many letters of condolence at the time but that was it. They weren't followed through with invitations to me!

I am lucky that I have quite a few friends who live alone for various reasons and are not in couples but another thing is I don't feel like going out my myself to cinema or restaurants but I am beginning to find things I do like to to.

I have also begun to invite people to mine or suggest we meet at a place for a walk or cafe such as a gallery or a garden.
I can't pretend it is easy though, especially if you are feeling down. I quite like it if people just call round.

The pandemic has created further problems though I can use it as an excuse when I don't feel like doing something.

I lost contact with some people when DH died 3yrs ago but they were more DHs bowling friends than mine but we were friendly and not a peep out of them since his funeral.

It is an odd situation: a world set up for couples. And yes, some friends do vanish like snow in summer. It is very painful.