My neighbor has died

The things you are all describing used to happen here in my Nans day but not for the last at least 40 years so this is interesting
Is it down to village/town or is it down to areas and customs ?
I d be interested in hearing more
Do people come out in your area ? No one draws curtains or stands in the street here in fact I ve not even seen a hearse for years

I remember as we travelled to the crematorium for my Fathers funeral the men taking off their hats in the street. Often think about it and it is comforting - it was many years ago.

I live in Australia and am in my late 70's. If not invited to the funeral (either by a public notice in a newspaper or by a personal invitation) I would send flowers and a sympathy card. Private funerals (declared in the newspaper) are becoming more frequent - sometimes because of few surviving relatives, or to keep costs down.
My grandparents (who lived in a small village with no phones) would stand outside as a hearse or bereaved family went by. Curtains would only be closed in the home of the deceased. They would be re-opened when the family was accepting visitors.
Clapping (to me) looks like you are pleased the person has passed.
I have few relatives or friends to attend a funeral when I die, so I have arranged a non-attended cremation with my ashes being scattered in the ocean where my late husband's ashes were scattered (a pod of dolphins came and observed).

A very much loved member of my family died recently. The care staff from the learning disability unit, where he’d spent the last year of his life, requested that we call by with the hearse so they could pay their respects.

We set off from the funeral parlour accompanying the hearse and diverted to the nursing home. A group of staff came outside and stood in silence with their heads bowed for 2 mins. Then just as we were moving slowly away behind the hearse they all stepped forward and gave a round of applause. It was incredibly moving.

In our street neighbours come out and bow their heads.

So do I.

Ah. Different customs hollysteers then.
Thank you for explaining.

HeavenLeigh

I’ve never actually heard of applauding at a funeral that actually makes me feel uncomfortable . Is this a new thing?

Seems to be. My stepfather thinks it’s awful. I agree.

yes to stand outside and bow head..

I recently attended a funeral in church and was surprised that as the coffin was carried back outside everyone turned and stared at it while I turned and bowed my head as it passed...
what is usual?

back in the day we would close our curtains and stay inside.

Nannashirlz, we’re all human, and signs of affection and sympathy never go amiss. I’d stand outside.

When my husband died at Christmas my very new neighbour who I had only said hello to twice came out and stood at the bottom of his drive and watched and waited as we drove off. I thought that was very kind and respectful of him as he had never met my husband. At a time of great sadness for me and my family this gesture meant a great deal and I have since spoken to him and his family and thanked them.

Standing outside and bowing the head is appropriate. Some of us still pause and bow the head as a hearse, any hearse, passes as was done by many of our parents when we were children. A brief acknowledgment of the passing of a fellow human being.

Maria Callas’ funeral, I meant to say.

Clapping as the hearse goes by comes from the continent.
I first noticed it at the opera singer’s funeral in Paris. Of course she was a performer.
Then for Princess Diana. It seems strange to us as it’s a new tradition.

Oops, just noticed that the funeral was today. I hope you feel that you did the right thing, whatever that was.

I remember being very touched when I saw a man remove his hat as we passed following the hearse before my father's funeral. If you stand outside with your head bowed, I think it would be a nice gesture.

Bow. Not how!!

A lot of people here will stop what they are doing and how their heads as a funeral procession goes by, too.
Men usually remove their hats, or touch them in a kind of salute.

Sometimes in my village, relatives of the deceased comment on our local Facebook page the date, time and route the hearse will be driving through and invite folk to stand and pay their last respects. I found it very moving to join in and I know it gave the family pleasure to realise how much their relative was loved and respected by all.
I'd certainly stand outside.

The hearse drives very slowly away from the person's home (or wherever the funeral is coming from) with one of the people (directors?) walking in front of it here.

It's just for a few minutes usually, so neighbours come out and kind of see the person off on their last journey.

We don't do that here. We would go to the funeral or if we don't know them stay inside.

I haven’t heard of the custom of standing outside except perhaps for a well known local figure when people may line the streets. Years ago, neighbours would draw the curtains.
I don’t think the family will mind whatever you do.

I quite like the clapping. We all did it when our neighbour died during covid. We weren't allowed to go to the crematorium and it seemed appropriate to show him that we thought he was a lovely man. Applauding his life in away.

Greyduster, thank you, now I understand. yes, by all means then Nannashirlz, stand and show your respect outside.

Here the family would meet at the funeral home and the procession would take place from there. We were taught to stop, bow heads and make the sign of the cross , (I'm Catholic) as a funeral cortege passed.

CanadianGran, the custom here is for the deceased to be conveyed in the hearse from the funeral directors to the house where members of the family will follow the hearse in cars to wherever the ceremony is taking place.