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Bereavement

RIP Himself šŸ’™

(239 Posts)
FriedGreenTomatoes2 Sun 22-Feb-26 17:30:02

My darling husband of 52 years died in the hospice yesterday afternoon.

My heart is broken today.

This bravest of men suffered dreadfully with progression of his oesophageal cancer these last 10 months I can’t begin to tell you what he had to endure.

He was admitted to the Christie early in January and thence by ambulance to hospice for his last two weeks of life. I stayed by his side for this past month, sleeping in a recliner chair by his bedside.

My overwhelming emotion at present is relief that he has been released from his struggle. He had 3 oesophageal stents in situ. I am glad that he wasn’t in any pain at the end of his life.

That was always his biggest fear and I’m so grateful he was at least spared that fate.

He once promised me, months ago now, that when he died he was going to ā€œtake all this sadness with me and leave you to the joy of livingā€.

I’m holding you to that promise my most brave and valiant man. My life will never be the same, I will miss you so very much, but I will try my very best to stay strong ~ as you urged me be. šŸ’•

Thank you to all who have kept us in your hearts and prayers during this pilgrimage. I’ve read GN most days and know how blessed I have been to have so much outpouring of friendship and love. I’ve been quite humbled to be honest. Xxx

GrandmasueUK Mon 23-Feb-26 01:55:44

So very sorry to hear your sad news. You are in my thoughts and prayers every day. I hope you too can be at peace and rest at last in the love of your family. flowers

fancyflowers Mon 23-Feb-26 01:44:59

I am sorry to hear your sad news. It's good that your husband wasn't in pain during his last days. You sound as if you were such a devoted wife to him.
He would not want you to be unhappy. You need to give it enough time, being very kind to yourself.

Eloethan Mon 23-Feb-26 00:45:12

So sorry to hear your sad news. I hope you can get some comfort from remembering a good marriage and happy times.

Curlywhirly Mon 23-Feb-26 00:07:43

So very sorry to hear this sad news FGT my Mum had esophageal cancer and I know from experience how difficult it is to see a loved one suffer from this dreadful illness. Himself is now no longer suffering and I hope that you take comfort in the many happy memories you shared. Thinking of you. thanks

Stilllearning Mon 23-Feb-26 00:06:13

FGT, I can only echo the outpouring of love and sympathy which so many people have expressed. Your posts talking about your life and holidays in your ā€˜happy place’ with your ā€˜dear man’ have touched so many people and all these messages are a tribute to that. Like many others I have remembered you both as you have travelled this last path together and I truly wish you the strength you need nowšŸ’

Pigma Sun 22-Feb-26 23:52:47

Don’t post often but read along and wanted to say I am so, so sorry to read your sad news. Heartfelt condolences to you and your family flowers

67notout Sun 22-Feb-26 23:52:28

Oh my, so very sad to read this. He sounds like a wonderful man and he’s left you with his strength to carry on, not in the same way but still with his love and wisdom. Tough times ahead, don’t push yourself though. Hugs

Oldbutstilluseful Sun 22-Feb-26 23:43:09

I’m so sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved husband and send my sincere condolences at this very sad news. I wish you and your little family strength and comfort in the days ahead

Litterpicker Sun 22-Feb-26 23:33:58

You have been a devoted and courageous wife to your man. It is good to hear that he did not suffer pain in his last days.
Thoughts and prayers with you and your family šŸ„€šŸŒˆ

SunshineSally Sun 22-Feb-26 23:23:15

Oh FGT I’m so very sorry to read this. Sending heartfelt hugs and much love to you all šŸ„€ xx

Wyllow3 Sun 22-Feb-26 23:15:52

Oh my, FGT, I am so, so, very sorry to hear your news. I'm glad you told your farewell story. What a lovely man. flowers

Dontcallmelove Sun 22-Feb-26 23:08:33

Deepest sympathies on your bereavement. It sounds like your DH loved you very much. I hope you can take comfort and strength from that love.

Redhead56 Sun 22-Feb-26 23:06:44

FGT your DH is free from pain now sleeping silently. He has not gone as he is with you and your family. Your wonderful memories will be in your hearts forever.X

SueDonim Sun 22-Feb-26 23:06:42

I’ve only now come onto GN this evening, FGT and am broken-hearted for you and your beloved husband. I am so, so sorry. You have both been brave above and beyond the call of duty in this life.

Thinking of you and your family and sending my heartfelt love to you all. Xxx

Cressy Sun 22-Feb-26 22:57:07

Himself gave you a wonderful gift with his words and I hope in time you will find your joy in living again. In the meantime be kind to yourself and keep going as best you can. I am so very sorry for you all. X

Lovetopaint037 Sun 22-Feb-26 22:54:33

Reading your post has made me weep. It is so full of love and a tribute to your husband. It so resonates with me and so many others as we reach the last years of our lives and realise there will be a parting for us in the near future. Your dear husband’s words will stay with me. Thank you for sharing them. You will always have your husband as he is a part of you. That can’t change nor the knowledge that you supported him with the greatest love to the very end.

Galaxy Sun 22-Feb-26 22:53:06

I am so so sorry FGT, I have been thinking about you. You write so beautifully about your husband. Look after yourself x

Luckygirl3 Sun 22-Feb-26 22:51:32

A sad day and I am sending a handhold. It is a huge blessing that there was a hospice place for him where his pain could be properly addressed and his comfort prioritised. I hope you have family around to day. x

cornergran Sun 22-Feb-26 22:35:39

To say I’m sorry for your loss is so inadequate, but I am so sorry for the loss of your courageous, wise and dear man. Your own courage has shone through, for now please just be as you are. My love to you and your family.

JenniferEccles Sun 22-Feb-26 22:32:54

So so sorry to hear your sad news FGT
I hope your brave husband’s words to you will bring you comfort in time.
Condolences to you and your family.

I would also like to thank you for taking the time to come on here to tell us your sad news.
It can’t have been easy.

mamaa Sun 22-Feb-26 22:30:20

Dear Urms/FGT I’m so sorry to read about your sad news.
Just try to recall Himselfs selfless words to you whenever things seem too hard to bear; they will be of comfort to you I’m sure through the difficult days ahead.
Sending love and my condolences to you and your family, thinking of you all and
may Himself now rest in peace, his struggle at an end. x

BoggledMind Sun 22-Feb-26 22:28:05

Please accept my sincere condolences flowers

wildrose Sun 22-Feb-26 22:14:09

I was not familiar with your situation but I send my condolences - you obviously loved, indeed love, each other very much flowers

Suki70 Sun 22-Feb-26 22:13:39

Such very sad news FGT. Stay strong and heed your darling man’s words. šŸ’

Nannytopsy Sun 22-Feb-26 22:13:23

You and himself have had a long, hard journey and it should comfort you that you have been with him every step of the way. Be kind to yourself and take his lovely words to heart.
I’m so very sorry 🌹