Growing old disgracefully (win a copy of Virginia Ironside's new book)

Well, I am quite glad I have grown up. I no longer worry what other people think of me,with the exception that I wouldn't want to embarrass my children and grandchildren by behaving disgracefully.
I'm with j07, I hope I never become depressed, and stay fit enough to do the things I want to do.
Older people tend to give things up because they can't do them any more, not because they don't want to.

If you were forced to wear high heels against your wishes then you have my sympathy.

(still trying for the sympathy there)

My bunions were caused by wearing heels far too high in my (now long gone youth. (actually I think they are more foot deformations )

j07 no bunions and I only fall over when not in the UK (long story!)

Mey, your dear Dad sounds just like my darling Grandma. She broke her hip in her 70s and was in hospital for a while much to her annoyance. I can remember visiting her, she was sat up in bed looking very grumpy and demanded that we organise her discharge as soon as possible. 'I'm fed up of being in here with all these old dears' she said.
Needless to say she made a full recovery and lived another good 10 years eventually passing away very peacefully after a hearty Sunday lunch.

Attitudes to age are so important. I am nearly 60 and my very healthy still working husband in in his late 60s. We went on our first Saga cruise last year and had a wonderful time. We met some fascinating people many who were much older and often frailer than us but they lived full lives and made us feel very very young. By contrast someone on Saga's website commented that he went on a Saga cruise for the first time and was very upset by how many really old and infirm people there were, and they made him feel ancient! Its all in the attitude!.

My DH is at the moment in his shed playing with his aeroplanes making a new model aeroplane.

No worries about keeping him young.

Gracesmum I hate the phrase 'young at heart' - sounds so desperate

Moved you're so right about keeping hubby young - my ex used to say 'I'm not getting any younger' when he was in in 40s! Drove me bonkers.

Mey your father's reaction to the Age Concern event reminded me of my mother, now 85, when she was 80 and in hospital she referred to the patient in the next bed as 'the old lady'! I think most of us don't see ourselves as others do.

Ah yes that was a bit strong I agreeeee But it was just him he had a FEAR of getting old and being de creppied

I love beong around people my own age and usually alot older, for some reason I feel a sense of calm

Your dad with his head down, not wanting to look at old people.

Oh ok but my Dad did really well until he died, he looked still quite good he walked every were there was not one thinh he could not do he died at 77

Why jo7

Sorry Mey - it will happen.

And it won't be a bed of roses.

Although I am diffferent in that I DO like to mix with people of my own age to share certain things that you can not share with younger people as they would simply not understand.

And I like to speak of old times and old ways and old music ets.

That is a dreadful attitude Mey!

And she's got bunions - at her age!

I would like to make it clear, I am relying on the symnpathy vote here.

Growing older can be a good thing, you are wiser for a start although no use to you yourself as it is usually too late but useful to others

There is a kind of wisdom though that it useful to yourself and that is, as we get older we realise that worrying about the little things is not wise and age does bring with it knowledge of life skills which are very useful.

My whole family have the attitude that we will never get old,

Let me give you an example please if I may--My Dad was feeling quite lonely and as I was a volunteer for Age concern at the time I offered to take him with me to get to meet other people his age, As we entered Age concern he stood at the door, took one look around and said Hayley these people are old!!!! he was quite upset that I had brought him here and had a quick cup of tea with his held held down the whole time then left.

This is the attitude that my whole family have. It works for us.

High heels absolute no no for people with back trouble - better flatties and a smiling face than "smart" shoes which cripple you. Just look at the expression on Victoria Beckham's face to see what I mean!

That was re Movedalot's No. 5.

What about the bunions. And falling over?

Lots of things to do:

1 Write a bucket list and then see how many things you can tick off
2 Join Gransnet and you will find there are lots of people worse off than you so be grateful
3 Take up some kind of exercise you have never done before. Gym and pilates for me and I'm fitter than I ever was.
4 Make a point of surprising your children on a regular basis, don't let them get complacent!
5 If you like wearing something but others think you are 'our age' wear whatever it is with pride! I love tarty high heals and wear them whenever I can. I won't shop in our local ladies outfitters, just the name makes me feel old!
6 If you can, travel. Book on impulse, much more fun than planning 6 months in advance. We booked to go to Hong Kong to see our son about a week before we went and decided we might as well go on to India while we were half way round the world. Had a great time.
7 Don't let your husband get old, make it a project - it works.

I'll stop now before boring you.

Do not merely seek the company of people of your own age and outlook - being with younger people may remind you of your calendar age, but it will also keep you young at heart.

Meantime, I will get on my exercise bike and try to shake things up a bit.

I'm not sure there are any up-sides to growing old. It is just that - growing old. And it is a total bummer. It is made up, much of the time, of tiredness, guilt, perhaps regrets, and depression. Any attempts at being "disgraceful" are, I think, purely cosmetic.

So I will follow this thread with interest. To see if I can pick up any useful hints.