Sex

We've obviously led him astray - poor pompa

I think you are being cheeky now, too, pompa!

Yogagran, I'll let you know as soon as things start looking up.

pompa - so pleased that some cheeky banter here has led you to a diagnosis, hope all goes well. Perhaps you'll keep us informed - not too much information though....!!

pompa how lucky are you to have such a switched on Doctor some Doctor's don't listen to us sometime's do they ? hoping all goes well for you take care

Good luck Pompa

Em, I am not disapproving, just [shocked]

Pompa good luck. Keep us posted.

Good luck Pompa - sounds as if all should be well!
For someone who seemed just slighty disapproving of the sexy gossip etc, that last remark of yours was a bit naughty was it not? Seriously, if this discussion got you to stop and think for a moment and perhaps helped solve a problem, then Hooray!!

The weirdest symptom that lead him to his preliminary diagnosis is that my feet have got bigger !!! (shame it does not work that way elsewhere). He has refereed me to an endocrinologist and ordered an MIR scan. Just got to bide my time.

I think a "phew!" is in order there, pomps. All the best!

Wow Pompa, you mean that literally then about the saving of life! Good luck with that one and keep us in the loop.

Looks like I may have a lot to thank this thread and some of the "gobby" grans on here (Nanachrissy's term, not mine), you Gal's may have saved my life. Reading what had been said, I realised that I may be missing out on things that I just put down to old age. Whilst talking my Dr. about some recent "odd" blood tests results, I mention in passing (as you do) my problem. Eureka, he put 2 + 2 together, did some more tests and now thinks I may have a tumour on my pituitary gland, and if his suspicions are correct, he may have caught it in time.

Enjoying the vino, Elizabethjoan. Part of the problem was that I did have lots of other things going on - including a family who at times can be quite demanding of my time. I'm absolutely ok with that and that's one of the reasons I knew I was doing the right thing because their needs were higher on my list of priorities. Being part of a good even-sided relationship is wonderful but when you know things aren't right you have to deal with the problem one way or another. Having spent the last few years of my marriage in isolation and unhappiness I promised myself I'd never be in that position again. However, if in the next few weeks I am swept off my feet by a wonderful man I'll be sure to let you know! Mind you - he'd have to be pretty wonderful!!

Em, I think you are honest and absolutely right. Most of us have spent vast amounts of time and energy, giving, to everyone else except ourselves. If you are not receiving something back then you get completely depleted of energy, love etc. I hope you are on the receiving end from friends and family. Fancy a glass of wine or two? Really, Darling, we are all Utterly Wonderful, even if Some People don't realise it!

I thought it was mainly men that talked about such things, especially as my ex really thought that every other man on the planet was having a much better time than he was. When a survey was conducted about how often it happened, the men seemed to do it far more than the women, which means that one lot wasn't telling the truth. No idea which lot that was .

Hello Pompa, I think you are probably right, but there are always some gobby ones like me! I've never been very good at keeping things to myself. What you see is what you get with me, I'm an open book! Besides, it's good to find out what other people think on any subject, life would be boring if everyone kept quiet!

I read the posts in this thread and suspect there are a lot of GM/GD that are quite happy with their sex lives however active or inactive they are. I also suspect that like myself, they like to keep this side of their relationship private and therefore do not post here. I only say this as i think the posts here are not necessarily representative of most GM/GD's.

Agree with crimson that men seem to be automatically territorial - you just have to keep batting 'em down! eventually the brighter ones get the message ... most of the time.
And as for being "selfish"!!! talk about self-justifying twaddle ... it's a man's way of playing the "little boy" card, and it comes out when he knows he's not getting his own way.
I'm rather enjoying becoming a bossy old cow.
I think what really holds me back (because, let's face it, getting back with one's ex is a cop-out really) is the fear that I'd never find another man. How do you start dating again after decades of being in a couple?

Fatfairy, I decided a while ago that I'm just not cut out to live with someone! Now it's "My house, MY rules"! I've told more than one man to push off if they didn't like it, and I enjoyed the feeling too much to give it up!! I know....I'm a bossy old cow but my "friend with benefits" seems to cope with it!

You were totally honest em and I admire you for doing what you wanted. Whoever told you that you were selfish to end it was being selfish to want you to continue in a relationship that you realised was not right for you.

Wonderful,Em, wish I'd had the means/motivation years ago!

Totally honest em, if more women were like you they might be a lot happier. Good for you!!!!!

Post-divorce and 10 years into what had been a good relationship, I began to realise that it just wasn't what I wanted any more. Things had become complacent and a bit boring but just as I felt things were cooling off, he seemed to realise what was happening and thought the answer was a proposal. I did not want to move in together as part of the attraction was that we had our own homes. Because I was willing to end it I was told I was selfish. I had not made any commitment and, although it was difficult, did walk away. I am happy in my own space and have no regrets. Having a man around all the time means constant compromise and I wasn't prepared to do that. Selfish or honest - up for debate.