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need a friend

(295 Posts)
nuttynana Mon 16-Apr-12 22:55:28

Feeling sorry for myself. Seem to have got to 60 and after a lifetime of working and looking after family then grandson find that I have no real friends. Didn't seem to notice when I was so busy, sounds daft I know, now I find I do not have the knack of making friends. I get out and about as much as possible and do meet people. I think I am fairly nice and normal,friendly and not really shy but friendships do not come I have no one I can I could go out with for a coffee or phone for a chat. Feel really lonely, time on my hands etc. Looking back this has always been the case. Read all sorts of tips about how to make friends but nothing seems to work for me. Something must put people off me I think. Anyone else like me?

glammanana Sat 05-May-12 18:32:57

misunderstood Welcome to GN I am so glad you have been out and about and not staying home,you will always find something to join in with on GN are you going to join in with our party celebrations tonight even if you just pop in for a short while your presence will be welcomed.flowers

misunderstood Sat 05-May-12 18:34:04

\not sure what it is?

Annobel Sat 05-May-12 18:36:13

Just join the party thread and you will soon find out - you don't have to be crazy but it helps!

nanachrissy Sat 05-May-12 18:40:32

Welcome misunderstood we understand you! grin

jeni Sat 05-May-12 18:54:19

Go to the Glastonbury party thread. It's a nice sober meeting of like minded gners who meet up with their knitting and sit in a circle drinking tea.

Anagram Sat 05-May-12 18:56:27

Don't say that, jeni! Misunderstood might be traumatised by the actuality....shock

greenmossgiel Sat 05-May-12 18:57:24

Hello there, misunderstood. Pleased to meet you. smile

whitewave Sat 05-May-12 18:58:31

is anyone invited to the party?

jeni Sat 05-May-12 19:00:57

Everybody!

glammanana Sat 05-May-12 19:19:40

whitewave just join in the party atmosphere we are quite good at having a good time,you have to be quick as jeni is rather partial to the Vodka jellies and has been known to have a few but in a very gentiel and lady like manner I may add,you will soon notice jeni she will be sitting regally in the corner with her pearls on envy I have just left soops house so will be landing soon.

pompa Sat 05-May-12 19:19:51

I know some Grans have already mentioned it, but the U3A is a great place to make new friends, many of our group's members are in exactly your position, retired and found their friends were still working etc. We joined with great ideas regarding what we would join in with, now we can't find time for everything, never happy !.

greenmossgiel Sat 05-May-12 19:29:46

I looked it up to see if we had a U3A in our area,*pompa*. I was surprised to see that there's one in the small town about 2 miles away from me. I had a wee look at what it was about, but it seemed a bit formal, dealing with issues that I may not know much about. How do you find it? hmm

pompa Sat 05-May-12 20:52:49

The last word I would use is formal, most of our group meetings are chaotic. I'm sure they will welcome you along to their monthly meeting so you can see if you like the group. Each individual group is usually just a few people that either meet in their homes or if the group is larger in a local hall. I am in the woodturning, photo, and computer groups. Mrs. P is in the book group, and we are both in gardening, walking, local history and family history groups.

greenmossgiel Sat 05-May-12 20:57:18

Thanks, pompa. I'll have another look at their website and maybe investigate it further! smile

butterfly1954 Mon 10-Dec-12 10:36:52

hi im new dont really know where to start' I need someone too talk to im lost because after a family dispute my daughter has moved away taking two of my three grand daughters with her . My eldest grand daughter lives with me and I love her so much but Imiss my other grand daughters so much it hurts please can anyone help me as it feels like my heart is going too break

whenim64 Mon 10-Dec-12 11:03:21

Welcome butterfly. You will find lots of support and understanding on here, and there are some particular threads like 'Cut out of their lives' and 'Denied contact' which contain lots of discussion about circumstances like yours. I'll put them on here shortly. They stay on for an hour if no-one adds to them, and then for 24 hours under active Active Conversations. smile

Ariadne Mon 10-Dec-12 11:03:40

butterfly there are quite a few Grans who will know how you are feeling; search for a thread "Denied contact" and you will find them. They are warm, sympathetic and full of help and advice. (I hope we all are, but these are the people in similar situations to you!) My heart goes out to you.

Marelli Mon 10-Dec-12 19:37:18

Don't despair, butterfly - I'm sure you'll find plenty of help and support here on Gransnet, although at the moment you'll be feeling quite raw. Keep posting, and in no time, someone will be able to help. flowers

CHEELU Mon 10-Dec-12 22:44:22

nuttynanna there are sooo many things you can do, you could join a cooking class or a stain glass making class or a knitting class or any class, just check out whats going on in your local library or contact your local council and ask them what class's are there in your area--You could do volunteer work, sooo many charities looking for charity workers, you could join a local walking club,you can join a weight watchers club to get health tips, you can join a dance class...all these things get you in contact with people and once you surround yourself with people then friendship comes its that simple. You sound like a nice kind lady to me and I wish you lived near me because we all could do with a nice kind friend, best wishes x