How to 'support' jobless child?

When my DD1 was looking for work, admittedly some years ago, I encouraged her to get off her backside and stop waiting for jobs to appear in adverts etc. We then did a tour of the City and surroundings where she presented herself at establishments and asked about opportunities and openings. This resulted in interviews and several job offers, one of which she accepted and stayed in for years, gaining relevant qualifications along the way. I am afraid it takes persistance and hard work, as well as accepting any lowly position to start with.
I do wonder whether University is the right way to go for many of the young people these days. I welcome the increase in apprenticeships which are now being made available - much more suitable for some.
I hope your daughter finds something soon frida

I agree with elegran. Most jobs these days go through agencies and a vast number are not advertised. They do not need to advertise when they have people on their books that have already proved themselves reliable. This is a much better way of getting "a job" in the end than sitting applying for advertised vacancies.
It will also expose her to different industries and workplaces and flesh out her CV.
So i would advise that as soon as xmas is over she registers with agencies and rings them weekly to "tell them she is available'. Have a set of work clothes e.g. plain trousers, tidy blouse, tidy shoes etc ready at all times and be willing to be extremely flexible and willing.
In the meantime i think your hunch is right. You need to toughen up a bit and expect her to do her fair share of housework and to contribute to her food etc. whenever she has an income. Anything else is not really helping her to feel like an adult. Young adults tend to regress when they enter their parent's front door and us parents often contribute by treating them as delicate young chicks.
Been there, got the t shirt. Hard not to but it is a mistake.

There is nothing wrong with expecting an adult who shares your house (although it is your child) to contribute fully in every way except financially, cooking, cleaning, shopping etc. I also think good idea to nurture the notion that they should in some way be thinking about finding ways to contribute financially, no matter how small (barista? baby-sitting or similar?) My biggest regret is not encouraging my graduate son to do something else, some additional training that he could 'fall back on' instead of only relying on having a degree. He lost his job in 2010 years ago and since then has not been able to find anything permanent. Half the problem is that he sees himself as 'a scientist'; 'an MBA graduate' etc etc. He does do volunteer positions and is slowly diversifying and broadening his options, but it has been tough watching him become bitter too. Not a good groove to dig oneself in to. He has had a lot of support from us and he has a lovely girlfriend, now fiance. I do agree that there is a problem of expectation; that getting a degree is a passport to a high paying job when it isn't so. My DH has always made a very good living as a self-employed electrician and lately, lighting consultant.

frida my son also graduated in the summer - with a First Class Honours Degree in Mathematics from a Russell Group university - and has yet to get a permanent position using his degree. He is working though as he has had a very good summer job for the last four years. His job is coming to an end this week and in addition to any vacancies in his field he's also applying for fixed-term jobs so that he's in a good position to apply for 'milk round' jobs starting next year. He's getting married next month so getting any job is becoming a matter of some urgency.
I do think that as your daughter is obviously trying hard and doing her bit to get a permanent job that 'tough love' won't really help. You might encourage her to work around the house so that she is contributing to the household, but I think that she probably needs a lot of support right now. When she is in work perhaps she can take you out to lunch as a thank you.

Give her time frida it's very hard to get a decent job, especially when a lot of jobs are going overseas. My son was about to take his university qualifications off his CV because he just could not get a job and was going to apply for supermarket jobs. My advice to him was to flood the market with his CV, so he sent it to over a hundred different places and not long after was offered a position as an Internet Engineer through a job agency. He was quite introverted and had to push himself to get through interviews. He really is doing very well now and is still studying to increase his qualifications. D1 took years after her first degree to get a decent job, she went on to complete a Bachelor of Education, then had contract teaching jobs for years before finally landing a position as a Drama Teacher at a private school. She had previously applied this position at this school and it was given to someone else who only lasted a year. My daughter again applied for this position and was successful the second time. She has been there now for eight years and says it is her dream job.

Frida your story is all to common. Most of my friends children have left uni with degrees,scary debts and no job to go to.I know of many graduates working in call centres and bars. My son has a degree in transport management and has spent the last 3 years as a bus driver. He enjoys this and is applying for posts in transport management but no joy yet. My daughter left school with good A level results and went straight to work in a letting office. This unfortunately closed due to the recession while she was on maternity leave and she just can't find a post at the moment. The trouble is vacancies that would be filled by non grads in the past are being taken up by graduates who can't get graduate jobs.My daughter is considering starting her own business to employ herself and others.

It doesn't even have to be paid work at first. Charities are desperate for volunteers and this looks good on a CV.

How about agency work? DS ploughed his first year at Uni and was thoroughly demoralised. He took a year out before starting to study again, and joined an agency which sent him to an assortment of jobs, from soldering electronic components (boring!!!) to working in the office of the Forestry Commission. Several of them asked whether he was interested in full-time employment - and he gained valuable experience of being in a workplace, and could fill his CV with what he had done.

And any sort of temporary job can lead to greater things - getting into the workplace in the first place is more important than what the job actually entails. Potential employers are impressed by a demonstration of initiative!

Hi frida without going into your daughters qualifications . My daughter left university with a good degree and couldn't find work. She ended up as a " burger flipper" for McDonald's . She worked her way up to shift manager and now works for a major coffee chain. There is absolutely no shame in starting at the bottom and working up . In today's job market having "something" on a CV is far better than gaping holes or periods of living off mum and dad . It's tough but it's reality I'm afraid. Good luck xx

Neither of my DS got a job straight after graduating and both spent long periods back in the family home. Jobs were easier to come by 20 years ago but still not a piece of cake. Both found menial paid jobs and both eventually found exactly the right career. Tell her to keep busy and not to lose heart.

All I can contribute is what one of my DDs did. She graduated with a first and couldnt find a job, worked in cafe on and off for five months and then got so frustrated that she said she would sit at the computer 24/7 and apply for everything. It took ten weeks, but she now does have a good job, although it was only made permanent after six months. Good luck to here and tell her not to give up.