My husband spoils me

Hi Gally, yes we do have to be strong, nothing else for it if we don't want to go under, I have now had my firsts of everything & now 2nd Christmas & New year, though I can't say I remember much about last Christmas & new year.
Hope you will have a good 2013, onwards & upwards as they say

spindrift How I feel for you.
I am going through a 'this time last year we were doing this and that' phase and quite soon it will be 'this time last year it was his funeral' for me too. It's very hard to be brave all the time isn't it? But we must or down hill we will go. Here's to a better year for us and all others who have lost someone dear.

so glad spindrift just read about what happend and my deepest sympathy.

my OH is 67 and 10 years older than me we must treasure our time together and not let our sad situaiton ruin what we have.

pleased Xmas was not as bad as you imagined, and well done for positive thoughts about new year.

And to you to Sheila.
Although it will always be sad time of year for you, I'm sure you will look back this time next year and be able to feel you have come a long way and achieved a lot. x

Well Christmas wasn't as bad as I expected, 12 months yesterday was my hubby's funeral, we had to wait because of the holiday & the Crematorium was busy, will now pick myself up & start a new year hoping to find a pottery class near me so I can at least get out & talk to people, we don't have a community centre anywhere near me or any club I could join, have looked on line, town library etc, up to now no luck, I am partially disabled & only drive very locally, I was 53 when I decided to learn to drive , never driven on a motorway, but wouldn't be able to manage now anyway so no big deal.
Hope you all have a great 2013

Sheila

spindrift I do hope you manged to get through Xmas ok.

love that poem as Janeainsworth said Remember, it is so true better to forget and smile than remeber and be sad, but very very hard.

Hi Spindrift I myself am a bit like your Husband in that I am not really one for having loads of people round, so I fully understand his thinking and for me, it was, my up bringing, My Mum always had loads of people in the House, drove me mad!! But you know as I said its great to read that yes its not a good position to be in but you do just have to get on and as you sooo rightly say what would your loved one have you do, they would not want you to be un happy. Best wishes

Thanks Cheelu, I like everyone else in my situation find it hard at times, but when I do I think what would Ron have wanted me to do & I get on with it, we did everthing together, went everywhere together, one thing he didn't like though was people coming here, stemed from his upbringing, so now I only have the one friend, she has been wonderful, but has her own problems at the moment, her husband is going through Radiotherapy. The computer is a lifeline for me because sometimes I don't speak to anyone for days face to face, I go in a chat room every evening & have some good friends in there.

Spindrift you are a good example to everyone x x

What a kind and thoughtful man! A lovely heartwarming story.

again thanks so much for your wishes, I have kept busy all day, I have very happy memories of him, he would never argue lol it so annoyed me I would be arguing away & he would ignore me completely, then say, happy now you have had your say, of course we laughed then, he was a good man couldn't have wished for better.

That was a nice story to read but was concerned for you having aggrophobia.It usually stems from something that has happened to someone. It can defiantly be cured if you can manage to see the right person/professional because some are really good and can help but some are totally useless. But if you get a good one thy can defiantly help Best wishes

spindrift (((hugs))), especially today.

spindrift I think you are so brave.
I love Christina Rossetti's poem 'Remember' which ends
'Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.'
It is hard to forget the pain of loss especially when anniversaries come round, but I hope you can smile a little too today.

Thanks all, yes, but will make the most of Christmas as a tribute to him because he loved Christmas just like I did

It is difficult Spindrift when you have had a lovely husband and lose them. You must be feeling very sad over the first anniversary.

Oh spindrift a sad Christmas for you

A sad but good reason for some of us to make an effort to be more appreciative Spindrift thanks

Spindrift xx

Oh make the most of it Vampirequeen, my lovely hubby used to spoil me as well, then suddenly on the 8th December 2011, he went to help a friend, had a massive heart attack & never came back, they let him die on the 20th December, he was 69, I didn't even know he was ill, he always refused to go to a doctor, he was a very active man still working by helping our eldest daughter in her business, he had always said he didn't want to live to get old, he got his wish, but what he really meant I am sure is that he didn't want to get old & have old man's ailments & be unable to do all the things he used to

vq your lovely husband is giving back and reflecting the care and love and recognition of your support for him as you have written before,you give to him,you are both blessed with each other,and are each deserving of the lovely things you do for each other..
I also have problems with,being out and about,bright sunshine blinds me and makes me anxious,noise is deafening crowds are disorienting,shopping malls supermarkets,panic attacks,fear of people behind me,in front of me around me,I also have a social phobia ,one to one and I am fine,large amounts of people..get me out of here...we have our coping strategies don't we,writing this in bed today,this feels a safe place to be for now.xxxlove nellie

VQ What a lovely romantic man you have in your life, how lucky we are to have men who care so much for us and are not affraid for other people to know it.

We love Jack Vettirano. My husband bought me a print of Back Where You Belong which is a couple meeting at a train station after a separation. He put my engagement ring on my finger at Oakworth Station (part of a steam line).

http://www.easyart.com/art-prints/Jack-Vettriano/Back-Where-You-Belong-66122.html?utm_campaign=350&utm_term=66122&utm_source=googlebaseuk&gclid=CPHyvNnH_LMCFefMtAodQGoA3g

VQ what a wonderfully romantic gesture; you must have felt cherished.
Welcome JAB - you'll soon find your way around.

VQ I started to tell Mr S about your post yesterday and I couldn't finish as I was so choked. The picture you painted of the pair of you dancing in that hall...oh my. How wonderful, how poignant. I now see you in a Jack Vettriano painting. Lovely to be so cherished, there must be a reason