horrendous row!!

oh yes thanks girls, having little blip today Daughters godmother just texted they got card no message or letter (the one who she wrote to and asked her to write back in summer) that hurt we not even worth a card.

sat and wrote to her but doubt will post it, she must know without me saying how hurtful she is being not to mention cruel.

Still on bright note we had my nephew and his wife round for evening and what a lovely time we had, they are expecting in May and only live round corner so be great to be part of it.

We never saw my twin brothers 3 boys that much his wife (now divorced) was very anti social, but is great to see him now! His wife is from Slovakia they met while he was playing football how romantic!
She is stunning and speaks excellent English!
lovely evening, they even wrapped up bottle of our favourite wine (they could not have known) with xmas card bless them!!

It is so lovely when people can come back on and report some good news. Well done, Celebgran, it certainly sounds as if things are cheering up.

celebgran, your OH is making a huge effort and I am sure you are too. You have each other and that is so important. I know there is a big dark hole in your life, but I hope you will have as happy a Christmas as you can with the people who love and appreciate you. ((((hug)))).

Things sound a good bit cheerier for you now celebgran . We can sometimes feel as if we're in an absolute pit of despair, then the light will break through and we can see our way again. Just having someone doing something nice for you is all it takes.

That all sounds positive celeb - lovely to hear he's making an effort.

Jeni hope the cruise going fantastic, we had such busy day Monday that did not have time to read all these lovely posts.

My mumalways said dont let the sun go down on your wrath, we do sometimes sadly, I am still fragile but things lot better.

is just damn hard at Xmas and I realise we have far too much going for us to walk out on that.

oh how lovely of you all to give me such lovely responses!!

am happy to say we did make up and even went out with our friends that evening but we both still quite a bit fragile!!

I do understand he is hurting too, and we have lovely son we are going to for Xmas, he was a poppett and tried to calm me down on the phone.
sometimes I drive to the seaf front and indulge in a good weep!
This time may have been good idea!
can you believe that OH TROD in dog poo again yesterday poor chap, but this time we cleared up together I had been at hairdressers, cut and colour feel lots better now!
got my nephew who hardly ever see coming round this evenign with his wife.

Marelli you give me some hope, how sad your daugther does not see our OH BUT it has been 4 years for us and to see her mother in law in the house with our grand daughters one we never seen, really really hurt and upset me just when you think it cant get any worse.
on positive note I did see little Mollie YAY AND she saw me deliverthe pressies.
thanks again to all of you we working through it all, OH chose me a beautiful ankle chain on Wed (I had to try it on!) we had awful lunch out at wethers poons I know it cheapie but sometimes can be ok, however we still had nice day and chose some good books for when we can unwind!
Also he bought me gorgeous orchid y esterday while I was at hair dresserss and chose a new xmas light deco for the window old one went phut so he is making enormous effort to appologise. we must look out for each other!!
to all you lovely grannies xx

Sorry celeb I got diverted from your thread.
Hope things are better between you and OH.
Could it be he feels neglected and sidelined by your attempts to contact GC?
He is certainly hurting too. Would taking a step back from your efforts at contact over Xmas help to heal your relationship.
Best wishes

celebgran

It's not worth to continue things. Just think of some threads on G.N. where people have lost loved ones or seperated and find being on their own hard to do.

As the saying goes 'You only hurt the ones you love', I think that is true and we all at times use people very dear to us as our 'whipping post' and regret it dearly.

jeni have a great time .I'll be thinking of you looking glamorous, charming the waiters and feasting on all that gorgeous food.
The worst thing about holidays is the packing panic.Hope it's all sorted .

Quite right jeni though I don't always find it easy to follow.

Apologies for my double post - but I must have meant it really seriously!!

Thanks janey

Have spent far too much time browsing on gn this morning but wanted to say to Jeni have a safe and happy cruise. Picked up that you are off from one of the threads(i forget so easily which ones i've posted on or looked at).
Oh and Merry xmas and happy new year!X to you allX

celeb please forgive him. You never know what tomorrow may bring and life's too short to let things rankle.
To quote a man I heartily dislike but can't argue with, St Paul ' let not the sun set upon your anger' it's good advice I've always found

Hi there movedalot keep that place you live in safe fpr my return(hopefully)
one day. OH celebgran I feel for you really I do. There are always the "old chestnuts" rolled out in any arguments and they are ALWAYS laced with barbed wire. As everyone has said we know whats going to press the buttons that have the most hurtful things to be said when we want to hurt our nearest and dearest. We all are guilty of it at some time or another. Unless there is a passive aggressive personility involved and then thats just as painful if not more so. I do hope the ice is melting for you both as you certainly sound like you need the support of each other especially like you say at this tome of the year. Oh i suppose christmas is lovely for the majority but it sure isnt good for people with "family troubles/upsets" whatever they are.
Xto youX

Hi celeb I've only just seen this and I think it has all been said above. I used to storm out and drive to a lovely big park and sit and read or listen to the radio for hours until I calmed down!

Imo men think flowers are the answer and really believe it! Of course they are not but they don't understand that and most of them don't know the word 'sorry'.

Maybe he can't cope with the situation and needs someone to blame and you are the nearest person.

I do hope you can find a compromise which is what most of us do most of the time.

nelliemoser I understand your point. Even our own dear Queen has quite a disfunctional family!

celeb A hug was going to be my advice too but everyone seems to have beaten me to it.

Morning celeb hope things are a little easier today. We all know that you always hurt the one you love - because it's safe to do so. Be kind to yourself and OH. (((hugs)))

Morning celeb hope things are a little easier today. We all know that you always hurt the one you love - because it's safe to do so. Be kind to yourself and OH. (((hugs)))

Please ,please give each other a hug - or maybe two. OH has said sorry in the only way men seem to think of viz flowers. Be magnanimous and make a move,you will both feel so much better, the longer it goes on the harder it is to ''make up'' so do it before Christmas!! My love to you both.

Whenever I start to worry that other families are happier or closer than mine, reading the troubles that some of GNs posters have had gives me a bit of perspective on what I feel about the difficulties in my own family relationships.

There are a whole lot of Granetters out there carrying on with lives with all sort of sadness and difficulties. Maybe it helps me remember that my-- odd-- less than satisfactory family relationships are not all my fault.
This idea does not put things right but it lessens my own possible feelings of "failure".
I hope this doesn't sound as if hearing others difficulties makes me feel better, that is not what I mean. Oh s**t I hope someone can see what I am trying to say.

Looking at what the posters above all seem to have experience of, it seems like (((hugs))) to all.
Have a restful night.

I think that men find it even harder than us to back down and say sorry, do you feel that you could make it easier for him to apologise? What a rotten time you're having

celeb (((hugs))) I agree with the others, hug and make up as soon as you can. The anti biotics probably don't help, they can make you feel awful. Take care

celeb you must be feeling really down. I am sending and ((hugs)).

Don't be too hard on him, celebgran. The flowers probably mean that he realises he went too far with his remarks but he'll be hurting too.