horrendous row!!

We all say things in anger that we don't really mean; I think you're hurting because you know that he would know how much that accusation would hurt you..which makes it hurt even more. And you're not feeling well either. Can only offer a hug and a bit of understanding.

Oh celeb I'm sorry you are having such a miserable time. Here's a {{hug}}

Hurtful words are so much worse when they come from someone you love, and who loves you, aren't they? He's probably feeling just as bad, celebgran, especially about his accusation regarding your daughter.
I do hope things will be resolved between you very soon.

celebgran It's a rotten time of year to feel sad and I do hope it gets better sooner rather than later.

Dear celeb how tough for you, after everything you've been through. You will get through this, I'm sure, but it hurts. ((hug))

celebgran, you're hurting so much just now. When I was estranged for a very long time from my daughter (7 years), I felt sometimes as if I was going daft with despair. My DH seemed almost uncaring about the fact that she had left our lives..and I felt so alone with it all. I think he just felt that things were peaceful again and no more rows were going to happen because she just didn't have anything to do with us. I tried over and over again to get her back into my life, all to no avail, but she did eventually allow it to happen, although she still will have nothing to do with DH, and probably never will. All our sad things are made sadder at Christmas. Especially when children are involved. But we're here for you to talk to and to explain your feelings to. Take heart that sometime soon things may just change for the better, as they did for me. xx

ANd your poor thumb and all. There are times when one wants to give a hug and a cuppa in person and this is one of them.

celebgran ((hugs)) for you and just to say that sometimes the men in our lives are not very good at showing emotions and that they don't fully understand the hurt we feel your DH is most prob hurting just as much but the matcho front they wear will not allow it to show through,take those harsh words with the pinch of salt they deserve have a hug together and start again. glamma xx

celeb Its the worst feeling isn't it when someone so close pushes all the buttons, they know how to hit the spot dont they!!! But its the person closest to you that you can say these hurtful things too.... but know they will stay around for the making up.
I think he will be feeling as bad if not worse than you.... go on give each other a hug and make up. {{{hug}}}

celeb good advice above. Yes, it can all spiral out of control. I once felt I just wanted to walk out of the house and just keep walking, walking, walking away from everybody and never stop.
I'd say take glasses advice. Just give each other a big (((hug)))).

Don't be too hard on him, celebgran. The flowers probably mean that he realises he went too far with his remarks but he'll be hurting too.

celeb you must be feeling really down. I am sending and ((hugs)).

celeb (((hugs))) I agree with the others, hug and make up as soon as you can. The anti biotics probably don't help, they can make you feel awful. Take care

I think that men find it even harder than us to back down and say sorry, do you feel that you could make it easier for him to apologise? What a rotten time you're having

Whenever I start to worry that other families are happier or closer than mine, reading the troubles that some of GNs posters have had gives me a bit of perspective on what I feel about the difficulties in my own family relationships.

There are a whole lot of Granetters out there carrying on with lives with all sort of sadness and difficulties. Maybe it helps me remember that my-- odd-- less than satisfactory family relationships are not all my fault.
This idea does not put things right but it lessens my own possible feelings of "failure".
I hope this doesn't sound as if hearing others difficulties makes me feel better, that is not what I mean. Oh s**t I hope someone can see what I am trying to say.

Looking at what the posters above all seem to have experience of, it seems like (((hugs))) to all.
Have a restful night.

Please ,please give each other a hug - or maybe two. OH has said sorry in the only way men seem to think of viz flowers. Be magnanimous and make a move,you will both feel so much better, the longer it goes on the harder it is to ''make up'' so do it before Christmas!! My love to you both.

Morning celeb hope things are a little easier today. We all know that you always hurt the one you love - because it's safe to do so. Be kind to yourself and OH. (((hugs)))

Morning celeb hope things are a little easier today. We all know that you always hurt the one you love - because it's safe to do so. Be kind to yourself and OH. (((hugs)))

nelliemoser I understand your point. Even our own dear Queen has quite a disfunctional family!

celeb A hug was going to be my advice too but everyone seems to have beaten me to it.

Hi celeb I've only just seen this and I think it has all been said above. I used to storm out and drive to a lovely big park and sit and read or listen to the radio for hours until I calmed down!

Imo men think flowers are the answer and really believe it! Of course they are not but they don't understand that and most of them don't know the word 'sorry'.

Maybe he can't cope with the situation and needs someone to blame and you are the nearest person.

I do hope you can find a compromise which is what most of us do most of the time.

Hi there movedalot keep that place you live in safe fpr my return(hopefully)
one day. OH celebgran I feel for you really I do. There are always the "old chestnuts" rolled out in any arguments and they are ALWAYS laced with barbed wire. As everyone has said we know whats going to press the buttons that have the most hurtful things to be said when we want to hurt our nearest and dearest. We all are guilty of it at some time or another. Unless there is a passive aggressive personility involved and then thats just as painful if not more so. I do hope the ice is melting for you both as you certainly sound like you need the support of each other especially like you say at this tome of the year. Oh i suppose christmas is lovely for the majority but it sure isnt good for people with "family troubles/upsets" whatever they are.
Xto youX

celeb please forgive him. You never know what tomorrow may bring and life's too short to let things rankle.
To quote a man I heartily dislike but can't argue with, St Paul ' let not the sun set upon your anger' it's good advice I've always found

Have spent far too much time browsing on gn this morning but wanted to say to Jeni have a safe and happy cruise. Picked up that you are off from one of the threads(i forget so easily which ones i've posted on or looked at).
Oh and Merry xmas and happy new year!X to you allX

Thanks janey