What I really want for Christmas

I had a telephone conversation with my son tonight and I feel bad about this because I usually manage to not whinge to him about things [I resolved a while ago to not discuss any problems with my daughter] but I told him I just wanted to belong somewhere. You know those lost souls floating about in A Christmas Carol; thats me.

crimson you are not lost, you just haven't worked out where you would like to land! (Heaven knows what's got into me tonight, I'm like a cross between the sodding Waltons and Patience Strong, if that's who I mean)

crimson my most revered fount of racing knowledge, you are entitled to a whinge, you are allowed to feel upset, angry, confused, (delete where not applicable) just bear in mind that you have come this far, and you can go further. (I'm bloody doing it again, "matron, I think it's time for my medication!"

Oh sod it, crimson, you're ok, really you are, and don't let the bastard loony grind you down!

Crimson, why do you feel bad about sharing your feelings with your son? Not only have you a right to share with your nearest and dearest, but they have a right to know what's bugging you. If they can sense your discontent or discomfort but don't know the reason for it, this could drive them further away. Our adult children can be our closest friends or we can dig a moat round ourselves and pull up the drawbridge.

I wish I could wave my santa wand (mixing my metaphors) and grant your wishes phoenix and crimson. it's not as if you are asking for the moon*phoenix*, I hope 2013 brings optimism on the job front - nil carborundum!
crimson give your dog a hug and watch her face split into a huge grin. It is hard to stay down when they whack you with their tails and grin all over their soppy faces. Of course you are entitled to a whinge, but as a mum you are probably still "protecting" them and keeping your feelings to yourself. "Whinge" to us any time you like - you need not feel like a lost soul. PS have you watched it yet?

What I really want for Christmas is a hug from my grandson...even a text,a card or an email would be wonderful.

I would like to see all my family in good health; DD's arm whole and entire, as it was before her accident, impossible; DDiL athritic problems all cleared up, possible and DH's hearing problem properly diagnosed and treated.

I would like my son to get his sight back and my daughter to stop being depressed.

I hope everyone's wishes come true if at all possible.

I'd like DS1 to be as he was before his stroke, still married and living in the UK with a couple of children. That was his plan before disaster struck! Failing that, I'd like a publisher to realise his book about his life is a really good read.

Id also like DS2 and DD3 to get over themselves.

Quote: " Our adult children can be our closest friends or we can dig a moat round ourselves and pull up the drawbridge."

That should go on the front page of GN. Good words anno.

I hope you all get your wishes, sometimes over time things get better.

Crimson I think you should discuss with your children. Mine always know if there is something wrong and have been known to think I was in a bad mood when I was upset and react accordingly.

Apart from World Peace etc and for one member of our extended family to think of someone other than themself I am OK with life right now. No, actually I am feeling very good this morning as one of my closest friends is so well less than a week after an op for cancer and everything is looking really positive. I was so upset when I heard about her illness but it made my day to see her so well and happy yesterday.

Thank you, JO5.

Not actually feeling bad about pouring my problems out to my son other than the fact that, of everything kicking off in my life at the moment he's the only person not causing any bother [he's always been the same, bless him]. And it's not the children, it's the work/life/relationships balance that has gone wrong and I'm desperate to retire [which I can't afford to do]. I don't agree about the friendship/drawbridge thing, I'm afraid; I doubt that many of us are close 'friends' with our children [I always thought my daughter was my best friend but I think a mother daughter relationship is more complicated than friendship] and how many of us can detach ourselves from what happens in our childrens lives? I think a lot of us are floating around in the moat [and we all know what used to go into moats ]. But my problems are miniscule compared to so many on here and a decent nights sleep makes everything look a lot better sometimes. So I wish everyone well and as has been said earlier wish a magic wand could be waved for everyone.

Crimson just because others have problems which you think are worse than yours it doesn't make yours miniscule. You are ahving a rough time and I think we all send our sympathy.

We do.

Crimson I think Christmas is a time that sometimes brings into focus the things in life that aren't the way we'd like them to be - and relationships and health matters seem to top the charts. I hope that next year will bring the changes you need in order to get more enjoyment out of life. Perhaps a 'personal audit' of things you can do to effect change might be a January target?

As for me, I'm actually quite content with my life. There are things I would change in a heartbeat if I had a magic wand, but I'm sage enough now to realise that I need to 'let go' of the things over which I have no control. I realise that in having the basics of life I am very, very fortunate and I know that life can change - for better or worse - in the blink of an eye.

Phoenix, my little fiery-feathered chicken. There is a certain irony in you being on anti-depressants given where you work.
I seem to remember it is rural, and I presume not many other jobs around or I would suggest look for another one.
Does not seem much to wish for does it, we would like to know that our kids are healthy and solvent - happy would be a bonus - and we would like to have harmonious relationships with close family members. Oh and seeing our grandchildren now and again would be good, Santa.
My DS1 has now completed his drive across the Nullarbor Plain and reached Perth and his family. He sounds massively relieved, bless him, from his text. So I am pleased about that today.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nullarbor_Plain

Is for our 2 daughters to get close together again - and for my grand-son's severe allergies to disappear, so he can live a normal life. Nothing else matters to me.

Phoenix I would like to reconcile with My Mother too but its too late for me, she has passed.........If your Mum has done nothing seriously wrong, you could make that call.... x x

Mum passed on years ago, bless her. Dear old thing that she was if she was around now that really would be the straw that broke etc etc. Twenty years on I still shake whenever the phone rings!

JessM , the problem is that I don't have a job at all. I was made redundant from a Business Development Manager role back in March, I spent a very miserable 3 weeks in July working at the caravan park & then was sacked (thank god!) I did a couple of threads on here about it!

I have applied for so many jobs that I have truly lost count, but so far nothing.

Sorry, meant to add that my GP thinks the depression was a reaction to being made redundant.

I'd love to be sat on the settee holding my mother's hand. [cry]

POGS {{{hug}}}

predictable here would give the world for card from my daughter at least a little one from the girls saying they liked their pressies. ANY CONTACT AT ALL!!

gET CROSS with myself that after all she has done to me It still hurts like hell being without her.