What has happened to GN just lately?

Nellimoser Goodness me, I hope Kali appreciates the lesson.

No you're correct Sel I do not appreciate the lesson. But here's one
initiate - definition
A transient verb. To set going by taking the first step;
So someone will initiate an argument by taking the first step. One person. The first step. Not guilty.
Goodness me, exactly. What is going on here?
Is there some rule which says only certain people are allowed to enter a discussion? Or that only certain individuals can express an opinion?
Perhaps I'm simply being advised in a kindly, but slightly patronising way, it's best not to get involved. To walk by on the other side. To ignore certain people. Now that last bit I can understand.

Greetings folks, just back from a delightful week in Southern Thailand, away ( mostly) from e mails and threads and GN, but today checking in to see how you all are, I am amazed to read the comments on this thread.
Such obvious strong and differing personalities seems to,at times bring out the worst or best of us, but is it all necessary to upset one another by typing out feelings on your computer/ iPad/iPhone . Surely you walk away. It's easy enough to do, isn't it?

Maggie I have just walked away from another thread where I couldn't believe what I was reading. But the trouble is then you leave the field open for more of the same kind of puerile comments and that does not improve GN either. It's the old dichotomy so aptly put by the Bard.

To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer
The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,
Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them:

Kali It's stretching it a bit to imagine that Shakespeare had in mind the 16th century equivalent of a few women squabbling on an Internet forum when he wrote those words.
Walking away now.

Watch it Kali, look how Hamlet ended up – you don't want to go there. It's obviously the day for quoting Will's longest play; I did so earlier. I wonder why.

Kali, please don't tell us that a spat on G'net is making you feel like falling on your sword!

I think Kali is stronger than that for a new poster. More power to her many elbows
Janeainsworth I have to disagree. The enduring nature of Shakespeare is due to the fact that his plays are as relevant today as they were when he wrote them. Take Romeo and Juliet which morphed so successfully into West Side Story, and King Lear and Coriolanus. Though perhaps the Taming of the Shrew and Kiss Me Kate is dated.
However back to the OP. I've only been able to log on intermittently as we've been having trouble connecting to our new Internet provider. It's all sorted now. I have spent the last hour reading though the threads I've missed. Yes, there is a change in GN just lately. I understand what you are trying to say Kali but I don't think you'll really get anywhere. It's not just the posters who seem to always be sniping, it's those who jump in and support them whether they are in the right or in the wrong that give them the power. You might end up coming down to their level, though I see you took good advice and walked away from a particularly 'puerile' set of posts. I am also walking, walking off GN. I am a professional woman and am not used to this kind of playground behaviour as Elegran so accurately described it.
There are many lovely people on GN that I will miss, but I'm sure they will understand. So a fond goodbye to those.
A word in defence of my nation. Not all Scottish woman are as portrayed in MacBeth as the aforementioned Elegran proves.

Help! I was trying to support Kali's previous post about her not initiating a row by pointing out that one poster alone can never cause an argument and that it always needs someone else to fuel it.

The rest was a general observation.

I think it is quite possible just to walk away from an argument with dignity intact, it is particularly useful to do that when you feel you are being deliberately provoked (like teenagers do). If in these circumstances you then continue arguing you are playing right into the hands of the "opponent" who is possibly, really enjoying watching you getting angry. Stop their "fun" by walking away.

I'm sorry you're leaving, Jodi. You will be missed.

I am really sorry you are leaving Jodi, I always enjoyed your posts.

Janeainsworth You are right. There are some other quotations from Shakespeare that seem far more appropriate to Gransnet than that one.

How about these two for a start?

They have been at a great feast of languages, and stolen the scraps.

More of your conversation would infect my brain.

absent I like that one
jodi before you leave, look at the January 13th weigh in thread.
kali is not a new poster but a reincarnation.

jane how do you know that? Who was she/he before? Why do people (apart from Jingle) do that?

jodi please stay and help to maintain that balance which has been in danger of slipping away. There are more Gransnetters who agree with you than the few agitators who find they can fuel a good row with some well chosen words. Balance will be restored and it's the nature of a thriving forum that people will come along and disagree in a way that offends others, but not everyone gets drawn in.

Take a look at the other threads that have interesting topics and friendly discussion, please, before you finally decide

Crikey, she has gone too - I tried to pm her to suggest she joins the Edinburgh Local site instead when it is launched (estimate end of Jan, may be later) but it said that name is no longer a member.

There must have been a good reason for the change of name, so it might not be helpful to give out the old one...

Well, that's a real shame.

You should always leave a very followable trail when you change your name.

And only do it when totally necessary. [prig emoticon]

That's in response to Elegan's comment about Jodi leaving.

Kali explained her change of name when she first posted under it and gave a hint of her previous incarnation. Now - just think which frequent poster hasn't been heard from recently?

Well you certainly have j07 but I have lost track of quite how many changes you have made. However, are you getting lazy by just changing the number now? If you do it again – and you probably will – maybe you should choose a name that keeps us guessing even if it's only for a couple of minutes.

There are times when name changes without a trail are fully justified. For example, I think there have been a couple of instances of posters being severely criticised and even bullied by their families so they changed their names.

As people tend to have a distinctive style to their postings and it is difficult to keep up a prolonged pretence of being someone else, it's usually possible to tell who they were in a previous incarnation – even when they lie through their teeth about being a new poster.

See Kali's post on the dieting forum on January 18th

absent Yes, information leaks out in different ways, doesn't it?

I am missing Greatnan. Where are you?

I've realised that people read posts in different ways and I'm sure that can cause problems [not that it can be avoided but that we could think again about what people have written]. I actually look on gransnetters as people that I feel I know and tend to interpret what they say judging by things they've said in the past, and that can make me read things into what they say [or miss things out] which puts a different slant on what they've said. We're also not journalists [thank goodness] or politicians [even worse ] so we sometimes say things the way we would in a normal conversation, press the enter button and realise it doesn't sound right, or could be misinterpreted [I do wish there was an edit button]. Once a misunderstanding has arisen it almost takes on a life of it's own and then it's easy to feel under some sort of personal attack, although that isn't actually happening. I hope jodi reconsiders because, like me she'll start looking at something she's desperate to reply to and can't . Gransnet can be the best of places and it can be the worst, but isn't that life [and forums] in general. And the support and camaraderie on here is second to none .