Newbies .

I joined last month and I thought that somebody would be paying me to keep quiet as I am forever sticking my oar in and will probably continue to do so.

I am definitely enjoying the banter.

I can't do banter as you have to be quick at the typing lark. I never learnt. My typing is tongue out of the cormer of the mouth rather than tongue in cheek. I th ink people who read all this stuff need a prize whether or not they post. They are getting the ads read aren't they?

I'm a newbie - I do come on to read the posts and current issues, but I feel quite hesitant to post as it is a little bossy on here at times. I think I made one comment on my arrival, and I was advised I obviously hadn't understood the 'thread' because I was a "newbie", then someone wanted to 'chat me up' as I'm evidently a bit wet behind the ears and then there's people being told off if their comments aren't deathly serious - so I'm wondering if I can find some where to fit in on here? My DD goes on mums net and tells me how there is so much moaning about bossy grandparents, I think yes, they're all on gransnet ! I am a 52yr old grandmother, this is v true, and I now have to wear reading glasses for my iPad (and when knitting for GD), but I'm still the free spirit I was at 22

Gulp! I suspect I'm the bossy culprit NewNana666. May I offer in full and humble contrition. (I think I remember making a comment when you (?) responded to a thread that had already moved on - I hoped I was being helpful to a newbie, but can see that I may have come across as bossy.)

NewNana666 welcome. Don't let the b..rs get you down (not you grannyactivist- I don't recall you ever being bossy) best just to pitch in and say what you like. It did feel, when I first joined as if one was entering the common room with the Head Girl, her deputy and a full set of prefects. I spend my time behind the bike sheds

You were like a breath of fresh air Sel when you first came on GN. I also felt quite picked on when I joined Gransnet one month after it started, but stood my ground to those who thought they had been given a prefects badge. I enjoyed it when more joined and gave as good as they got. I don't think some people realise how mean they appear when they tell off a new member.

Your comments are well received ladies. Thank you But if this is our attitude towards newbies, then what attitude do we convey to the wonderful new parents raising our amazing grandchildren? What you're describing to me seems to be an acceptance of an established initiation process to support a meaningless hierarchy. That's not how I see my role as a grandparent.

NewNana666,I'm fairly new and trust me,I feel you are reading to much into it. If a Yank can feel at home here,you can too.Stick around,your feelings will change.If not,what have you lost? If you leave you won't know what your missing.I hope you see this.

NewNana If you avoid Politics and Religion you'll find a very kind and supportive group of women and some men. Sort of like real life. There's a few know it all loud mouths on aforementioned threads, myself included

Brilliant advice too on practical matters so you takes yer pick and take from it what you will.

Faye thank you. I do think many misunderstandings are caused by the medium. I know I often type something light-hearted and it doesn't come over in the way I intended. There's way too much nit-picking over words - I'm really glad there's a spell checker now

What spell checker? I haven't got one....

Oh goody Mines an automatic one..as I type. It appeared from nowhere Ana Maybe it was only given to those in need.

I joined a couple of years ago, but don't subscribe to pecking orders, cliques, prefects or assuming new Gransnetters are anything other than welcome and will want to discuss the sort of issues that interest other grandparents. I couldn't help the fact that I joined when I heard about Gransnetters, nor could I see into the future and find that anyone who joined at the start of Gransnet would be regarded as somehow seeing themselves as head girls or suchlike. I certainly don't identify with labels like that. (I'm not angling for anyone to say they don't mean me, by the way).

Some new members jump right in and post when and where they want, whilst others take their time. I was slow to join in at first, but now I've got to know my way around I feel more confident. I've even met a few Gransnetters in the north-west, and found each and very one of them to be lovely people.

It does hurt to be described as has been said on here, when one is part of a massive group of people who all joined Gransnet at the start. We're all one homogenous group, all different and all with much in common. It's great to see new names and discover the interests and experiences that they bring with them. I understand that some people will see things differently from me, but that doesn't make my view any less valid than theirs.

When, you might not have been angling but I will say it anyway - you are definitely not a prefect! In fact, the people I think of as being prefects joined more recently than either you or I!

I joined fairly early on and would say that there are some people I seem to gel with and others I don't. But I enjoy everyone's input, whether I agree or not, until they start to get 'superior' then I start to get and walk away.

Like you, I started slowly but, maybe because there are more 'personalities' posting now, I wouldn't be so brave now.

But I still feel short-changed when people don't join in but win prizes

I should also have said 'Welcome' to all new posters - how rude of me

Hmm. I like envious's reply and share when's reaction to being referred to as "bossy". We've all been newbies in our time and I certainly didn't expect any special "treatment" when I started posting. It was no big deal after all. Some have a little to say, some a lot, some have strong views, others like a laugh - hey we're all different and I have rarely met anything other than friendship and understanding. I have never been "chatted up" but I wouldn't expect it from a largely female cohort nor am I aware of any telling off because a contributor was a newbie. So all I would say is, read, relax and post if and when you feel you have an opinion you want to express.
Like kitty I think it is nice to see the names of contributors among prizewinners however!

I've been on here almost since it started, and seen a lot of newbies joining. All were welcomed and accepted and found the threads that interested them.

Don't expect to be on the same wavelength as every single other poster - some of them will have completely different opinions, and a few will be tactless in how they demolish other views. A very few, too, try to cause trouble by "warning" new posters about people whose personalities they dislike particularly strongly. I'm not sure what that says about their own personalities.

Some newbies find really strong differences of opinion disconcerting, but they are rare, and easily avoided. Those who come up against them unexpectedly can feel quite battered, but it in almost all cases it is not a personal attack.

If you do feel that you have been criticised unfairly and personally, then report the post to GNHQ and they will arbitrate.

As ever, sensitive and sensible words of wisdom from you, Elegran Thank you!

I am fairly new and have posted a few times now and I was just wondering, at what point is one not thought of as a newbie ha ha? When should you feel like an old timer(in regards to Gransnet, not by numerical standard) I personally have found it to be a very welcoming place and I thoroughly enjoy reading other points of view. I think occasionally there may be the odd person that makes things personal, but on the whole I think everybody wants and enjoys a good debate, a good laugh and gives and receives help to those of us that ask or need some and personally, I am very grateful for that and long may you all keep going.

It is like age, PP Someone is old who was born ten years before you. Someone is a newbie who joined a month after you - and stays a newbie.

For me someone who has posted a few times is an old hand. Especially when they start to welcome new newbies.

I've been here for ages but I still feel like a newbie, everyone seems so confident about writing posts. I have been trying to join in much more lately.

I am a newbie but I put my oar in several times a day!

charleygirl that's brave

Thistledoo please join in

I like to see new names cropping up on threads and in my mind anyone is only new when they first post. I remember being very nervous when I first started, but quickly got into the swing of things and I post on all sorts of topics. I have had so much support and encouragement from gransnetters that now I wonder how I managed without that support previously. Gransnet is mostly although there's an occasional thundery shower, a blast of hot air sometimes, and the odd bit of frost now and again...... but I quite like varied weather.