Little boys and fighting

I agree, perfectly normally part of growing up. DG has no such toys but we went to the woods and he picked up a stick which soon became w weapon. At 3 he fully understands it is only make-believe. Our 3 had dolls and prams/pushchairs and didn't become mothers and they had toy guns and action men but didn't become violent.

It starts early! My sister-in-law gave DS1 a cowboy outfit for Christmas when he was not quite three. Next thing I knew was DS2, aged 11 months, crawling round the corner into the kitchen, brandishing a six-shooter, shouting 'Nang, nang!' He is now very particular about his own sons' toys and rejects guns as unsuitable. However, water pistols somehow find their way into the garden!

My brother and his pal were always playing 'Polish resistance' and my little brother was always the Nazi being shot or tied up! If not that then cowboys and again my little brother was always the 'indian' being caught and punished! All are non-violent adults now and have a full grasp of the colonialisation of north America!!

Yes, nanaej we had protests of 'we're only pretending!' whilst one was crying buckets about the red mark on his arm and the other had a grin on his face. My sons never had toy weapons but could be seen fashioning them out of Lego, and would make a beeline for them when we went to other houses where they were allowed them. They have turned out to be peace-loving men.

Hi Flickety don't worry..it's normal! I have seen this in 100s of children. Try saying ( with conviction) something like ' I am really scared! If you chop my arm off it will really hurt' He will probably reply with ,somrthing like, 'No it's just a plastic sword'. He knows it is fantasy and not real and is simply exploring and enjoying this 'pretend' play. It is good imaginative play and just fine..even if it gets a bit wearing! You could try to re-direct by getting involved and sending him off on dragon hunts or ogre slaying mission

My 5yr old DGS did not want to stop playing recently when it was bedtime and said he could 'light-saber your legs off' to prevent his mum chivvying him into the bath!

It is that old nature / nurture thing again! When I worked in a playgroup we allowed no weapons of any sort but the boys soon made guns and swords from lego. Although they were strongly discouraged it seems like a kind of innate thing in little boys which has to be gently "trained out" of them. While the girls (in general) turned the climbing frame into a house, the boys turned it into a castle. If the girls persisted with the house the boys would become firemen and "hose down the house". I am fascinated as a student of women's studies (many years ago) how this seems to be part of the growing up process. I hasten to add the gun toting, fighting boys generally turned into really nice thoughtful young men. There is hope.

Hi, Flickety (this is my fed up with it look). Yes, Mike the Knight has appeared in my little grandsons' lives and I'm partly to blame. We started with a Viking boat and castle, horse, visor and various figures and all was well, then it was the swords, albeit short and covered in foam, still potentially harmful. Relatives saw that they had the harmless toys and looked for more Mike the Knight stuff to add to them, not realising that the emphasis on play was turning to combat. The swords were confiscated and words were had. Now, they earn a point for being kind to each other and us each day, and extra points are earned for not shouting blood-curdling battle cries! They've done well this week and are earning enough points for afternoon tea at the chocolate shop on Wednesday. Seems to be normal for little boys to be attracted to fighting games that include the odd extra shove or elbow!