CHRISTMAS CARDS.

to all of those Gransnetters who have recently lost a partner or other loved one. It is so much harder at this time of year, isn't it? So many of the sentiments in cards are inappropriate! I try to check them out before sending them to bereaved friends. I find many of the cancer charity cards have more sensitive and appropriate messages.

What I most missed the first Christmas after my daughter died were the cheery red Father Xmases. People were of course being sensitive so we had mostly sad looking angels but they in fact highlighted our loss even more. I always try to add an 'x is not forgotten' type of message to people who have lost someone & not just in the first year. I discovered if you give time to your grief at Xmas, it is also possible to have fun.
I thought about cutting out Xmas cards & have shortened the list but I enjoy getting them & decided even a small annual link with people is worth the stamp - you never know if it will become a bigger link again. At least keeping in touch on facebook means fewer or shorter personal messages - I just can't do a typed general missive.

Thanks for that Tiggy

I used to love it but now find it such a chore - I am tired and feel my resentment might infiltrate the cards - not good!
I used to enjoy sharing the task with the children but its not the same anymore.
As others have asked - what is the correct form for whom you should send to? The cost of stamps means most of us need to cut back but who to cull???

Gadaboutgran - I like your philosophy especially as I know I am guilty of neglecting friends - I should get a grip, smile and get writing - I might even enjoy it, thank you : )

Well Mr N went to pay C.T. at post Office so I asked him to get some Christmas stamps .
15 2nd class as we are cutting back came to £30.00 b----y quid .
not funny at all !!

I give the money to Charity instead. Much better use for it than the card manufacturers and the Royal Mail, particularly now they're privatised.

That surely can't be right Nonu if so I am not sending any.

Ill phone relatives and friends.

Nonu That is £2 a stamp. Someone's arithmetic is way out. Are you sure it wasn't £15 for 30 stamps?

Crikey nonu!What size are the cards!

Hold on a minute Chucks he is watching Footie , dare not not interfere.
I am listening to Mama & papa"s which I picked up at walmart for 5 bucks , roughly £2.50, and making out Christmas list of what we need .
Will get back to you l;ater XX

Yes, those figures [£30] are not right, I know the PO is expensive..... but!
I don't mind writing the cards, I do them in 2 batches, first batch are to be posted [about 20] second batch [about 20] to be given, either handed over, or furtively pushed through letter boxes at dead of night, lol.
I like receiving cards, and don't want to suddenly cut anyone out that may like receiving one from me.I do try to send an appropriately worded card to someone bereaved though. I keep the message inside each card short and sweet , as I hate getting a synopsis of anyone elses year[Robert is doing well at the bank, Amanda had triplets, and Fiona won best pony award, you know the sort of thing!]It is the start of the Christmas season when I put the cards up on a card holder in the hall.

Whoops 30 stamps came to £15 .
I am not saying anything ! You cannot expect me to be brainy & beautiful!

LOL

Oh God, rosesarered. I've just finished composing a little annual synopsis that sounds very like the one you describe. I enjoy reading news from my friends, and I just assume they want to know mine. I do keep it very brief though. Simon Hoggart in the Guardian has compiled a couple of books of really bad - and mostly hilarious - round robin letters that he gets his readers to send in. I'd hate to see mine quoted in there! I sometimes feel that SH lacks a bit of self-awareness though. Some Saturdays his column just resembles one long, boring round robin bragging about his family, his friends, his meals out, etc.... Just because he's paid handsomely for it, doesn't make it interesting.

I took cards to a PO today and it cost me £1.20 to send a card to Canada and 88p each for 6 cards to go to Eire. Daylight robbery. My second class stamps were bought before the last price increase so I am not sure how much they cost.

Hand deliver where possible, anyone on email gets electronic wishes and the postage money saved goes to charity. Much better use of the money.
Elderly relatives and non email still get posted card, down now to about half dozen. Merry Christmas all.

I send several to friends from long ago (even school; cue Flintstones music) with a brief update, and really enjoy getting the same from them. On the rare occasions we do meet, it means we don't have to go right back to the 60s or 70s to catch up! It is a bit daunting before I start, but I'm always delighted to get it finished, so that's a bonus. We also send to friends locally either by Scout Post or delivered by hand. Sometimes I wonder why we send to some friends but not others, but by this time of year that becomes too big a question to answer.

This year I am finding it a bit more difficult as DD's marriage has broken down and I don't want to inflict that on people as they read their Christmas card, so it's not possible to say that everyone is fine. Also, I am still a bit down about it all, which makes it more difficult to be cheery! However, this week I have heard about much more serious problems that 3 friends have, and so perhaps I will redevelop a sense of proportion.

and [hugs] for those who are finding it so difficult because of bereavement. The hurt will never go away, but one day it may become less sharp - I hope so for you all.

I hate writing Christmas cards and a couple of years ago cheated by ordering a small rubber stamp which gives a Christmas message and the family names and a small present picture! This saves me loads of time as I only then have to add the persons name at the top and address the envelope. I stopped giving cards out at work and instead donate £10 to Cancer Research instead.

I like sending cards more since retiring. More time? more interesting life? I know that people, family, friends matter more, perhaps I'm finally getting the balance right

well I have made a start on my cards .
It is not as onerous as I thought it would be !!

I only give Xmas cards to close family but DH insists on sending cards to every acquaintance made over the years, so I let him carry on. Keeps him occupied for a while.

I loathe writing them and do most of them, but insist DH does his whack of his friends/contacts from way back. I never really know what to say when I write the cards - agree with Maggiemaybe about SH in the Guardian, so don't do the round robin bit ever. And can hardly bear to read the r robins we receive - DH reads them but they enter the recycling bin rather fast after that.

Family, close friends get them posted. Neighbours/nearby's go by hand. Last year's big cull brought this year's down to manageable numbers & postage costs. The others I still send to receive very classy ecards - but I still spent quite a while yesterday selecting the most appropriate ecard for each. The spin off is enjoying looking at the animations & listening to the music myself before I send them.

I love January, preferably just after 12th night when all the Christmas clutter goes away and there is clear space in the house once again. Oh dear, just realised tree & clutter will descend from the loft this week for the annual dust-gathering airing.

I have discovered 2 really annoying facts about this year's Christmas cards. The ones that tell you someone's new address arrive after you have posted their card.

And, despite my leaving notes all over the house, DH still hasn't written his onecard.

I do about 60, plus of course quite a few e-mails. Got the overseas ones away (7 in all) at the end of November.