Gransnet forums


Is anyone else glad it's over?

(150 Posts)
absent Fri 27-Dec-13 04:41:33

I'm not complaining about Christmas. Absentdaughter and her husband were faultless and generous hosts, the children behaved impeccably and appeared to love all their presents. Just somehow it all seemed a bit unreal and I just had that feeling that it was all too much for too long. I am not doing a retrospective bah humbug but I'm just relieved to get back to what passes for normal in my life.

Am I the only miserable and ungrateful old bat on Gransnet?

Mamie Fri 27-Dec-13 04:58:21

I agree absent. I am always glad when Christmas is over and the world wakes up again. It is much better here in France where it is only one day, but I have always fretted about all of the arrangements, everyone getting to their destination safely and Christmas going smoothly. I think it probably goes back to my childhood where relationships were very fraught and difficult and my mother was always exhausted from holding it all together. It was always fine in our own family, but there is something about the weight of expectation that makes it hard. I don't have anything to worry about now as it is only OH and I and we keep it very low key, but yes I am still glad it is over.

Granny23 Fri 27-Dec-13 05:50:03

Over? Lucky You smile After having 8 family for Brunch today, we are staging another Christmas Day tomorrow when DD2 and DGD1 return from 'Dhan Sauff', with presents, meal, the whole shebang again, and, being Scottish we can look forward to all the visitors and visits, big family meal (steak pie this time) next Wednesday. The Ho!, Ho!, Ho! is wearing decidedly thin.

Mamie Fri 27-Dec-13 06:20:14

Well not over in that sense Granny23 because we are just about to set off for the UK to celebrate DD's 40th birthday. We will be there for New Year, but we always ignore that anyway.
No, it is more about the intense weight of expectation about Christmas itself. There are lots of threads on here and Mumsnet that suggest that quite a lot of people find it a stressful time for all sorts of reasons. Looking at it from across the channel it sometimes seems like excessive consumerism gone mad in the UK. That must be pretty hard for people who are struggling to cope financially or emotionally.

Ariadne Fri 27-Dec-13 06:28:30

We were with DD for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day; are doing Christmas with DS1 and family in Hampshire now (watching Thomas the Tank Engine!) then off to DS2 in Cheltenham later. Quite a bit of travelling, but I haven't cooked! Then they are coming down to Devon on Sunday for New to check Sainsbury's online delivery times. But DDiLs will bring remnants of cheese boards etc. Have vague menu plans, once I know what everyone's plans are!

So I will answer the OP sometime next week. tchgrin

Nelliemoser Fri 27-Dec-13 07:06:46

No Absent you are not. Granny23 me too.
The enforced Xmas jollity is now off. Correction it was never here these last few days. Not quite the Fairy tale of New York but getting near.

However the family bit is only just starting. Weather permitting DD & Co are coming from Yorkshire miles and DS and his woman from deepest Sussex. To put it mildly I have not had the most harmonious of Christmases.

NfkDumpling Fri 27-Dec-13 07:32:35

We've had a very pleasant two days. Just right. Presents are now exchanged only with close family and cards are only sent to people we hardly ever see so we can catch up on each other's news. So it's pretty hassle free. We have our annual complete family gathering around Easter (better weather, four days hol) so the pressure of who's turn it is to go to whom is off as well.

I for one though am really glad that all the media hype is over for another year. Now we've just got to get through all those looking back on the year programs on TV.

Aka Fri 27-Dec-13 07:38:48

Glad it's over? Only in the sense that the worrying if everything would go to plan is over tchhmm
I think us, in the northern hemisphere at least, need something to break up the dreary and short days of winter and Christmas us as good as anything. Now we just have to get through January and February.....

NfkDumpling Fri 27-Dec-13 07:43:07

Nellie, I'm sorry your Christmas Day was a nothing day and do hope your belated Christmas is a success. All the hype of families being together when in fact it's an impossibility. Perhaps that's the real reason why, in the Good Olde Days, to give time for everyone to get around to see everyone they had twelve days of Christmas and not just one. (Think of that Absent. Media overload!)

harrigran Fri 27-Dec-13 07:43:24

I agree with you absent. I do like Boxing day because DH and I have a lie-in and then read a book or watch a little TV. Meals are usually some tasty morsels from M&S and cold turkey and vegetables. No cold calls at all on Christmas day or Boxing day, it was heaven tchsmile

12Michael Fri 27-Dec-13 07:52:23

yes, galds to see the back of it ,and will be glad to see the back of 2013 as well, as my year has been a mixed one of problems and things.
Xmas wise my neice over from CANADA who stayed at sisters , and I spent 2 nights in a local B & B , had a upset stomach ate something that disagreed plus taking 2 lots of high blood pressure tabelts.
But feel sorry for those in the UK who have suffred thanks to the will caeron ask for foriegn aid to help Uk ? clear it up.

Kiora Fri 27-Dec-13 07:54:58

Here's a resounding YES from me. I'm glad it's over. The shopping, the wrapping, the planning, the cooking, the visitors. Phew. Yes it was lovely to see all my children and grandchildren. Yes lots of happy memories have been made to pass down the generations "do you remember the year Nanna forgot etc" All lovely but exhausting.

glassortwo Fri 27-Dec-13 07:59:50

Its good to get back to some normality even though this year we have had a very laid back couple of days, and I didnt cook a thing yesterday we all went out for a meal. Poor DH is back to work today.

lucyinthesky Fri 27-Dec-13 08:00:08

Totally agree Absent. Thanks for starting this thread as I did want a rant of my own! Am SO glad Xmas Day is over.

DD2 and I were invited to spend Xmas with DD2, SiL and GS (age 15 months) in their new house. It is the first Xmas for 6 years that DD1, DD2 and I have spent together for 6 years as DD1 goes to her inlaws in Wales every year but now is doing the one year there, one year at home routine.
There is a huge family in Wales unlike ours) and DD1 in her own words 'doesn't have to lift a finger there' so really enjoys going. As a divorced single Grandma I can't offer that.

Having read threads on Gransnet prior to going I knew I had t keep schtum if I didn't agree with anything that DD1 insisted upon - their house, their routine etc etc. but DD2 found it very rude when SiL didn't thank her for the expensive book on climbing that she had thoughtfully found for him (he is besotted by climbing) and while I am a doting Grandma is it normal for newish parents to be quite so baby centric as my DD is?

She doesn't ask anyone about their lives and when DD2 and I tr to veer conversation away from b'/feeding etc and talk about exhibitions or films, DD1 interrupts with baby talk! And the number of gifts for DGS was gross. No child needs so many toys.

DD1 wouldn't have anything on TV except CBeebies so no trad Xmas TV at all but the absolute worst moment for DD2 and me was when we were watching Dr Who and just before thend end (yes the moment when Peter Capaldi was about to appear which 10 million viewers watched!) DD1 turned over to Downton saying that 'no-one's watching Dr Who anyway' even thought DD2 and I protested loudly that we were she refused to turn back and we were left watching flaming commercials.

Luckily DD2 was working on Boxing Day so we left at 9.30 and both cheered up in the car driving back. DD1 was in blissful ignorance that we hadn't enjoyed ourselves as much as we might have done, although SiL's turkey was cooked very well :-)

Thanks for reading my rant.

Kiora Fri 27-Dec-13 08:10:08

Your welcome Lucy reading your post I can assure you that you sound like a normal lovely family to me. These are little niggles that make up a well balanced family life.

kittylester Fri 27-Dec-13 08:19:02

Nellie I hope you enjoy the time with your family and I am sorry your DH is so miserable. tchsad

We had a peaceful and calm Christmas Day with just DS1 and my brother and his wife. DS1 came again yesterday but I just cooked steak and potatoes with salad.

But now the fun starts! DD2 will arrive in a while with her DH and two daughters. They are staying until Monday. On Saturday, three more children and their families plus DH's brother and his wife are coming for a present opening fest and a Boxing Day buffet - should be fun and chaos.

But then, all of next week it is just DH and I. Bliss. sunshine

I'm a bit of a control freak so I am really looking to January 7th when order is restored.

dollie Fri 27-Dec-13 08:19:26

you lot dont know how lucky you are being able to spend xmas with loved ones...i for one would have loved being in your shoes ...

lucyinthesky Fri 27-Dec-13 08:22:50

Hi Dollie I think the problem with being with loved ones is just sometimes so stressful as everyone is expected to enjoy themselves and be on their best behaviour simply because it is Xmas. Sorry that you weren't with loved ones yourself.

lucyinthesky Fri 27-Dec-13 08:25:30

Thanks Kiora but we already know that next year will not be so high in expectation as we won't all be together on Xmas Day. But the hurtful thing for me is that DD1 prefers going to her inlaws anyway, (and not my small flat).

shysal Fri 27-Dec-13 08:30:29

I still have 10 coming for lunch on Sunday, but I feel relieved that Christmas Day is over. DDs were both welcoming and lunch and time with GCs were great, however I couldn't wait to get home and have a good cry! Silly I know.
I am not keen on New Year celebrations either. I shall go to bed (alone) and be woken up by fireworks, which in my opinion are an obscene waste of money.

jinglbellrocks Fri 27-Dec-13 08:43:13

I won't let it go yet! Love it too much.

I hate it when grandsons go. I've only been allocated a couple of days this year. Still got today before they set off for their big annual friends meet-up.

rockgran Fri 27-Dec-13 08:47:45

You can always have a good rant on GN - very therapeutic. grin

I always enjoy things better in retrospect - I love looking at photos of events rather than the actual experience. That way you just get the edited highlights. I was dreading our first Christmas with the grandchildren overseas but actually it was very low key and pleasant with a nice FaceTime as the main event. Too much chocolate was eaten by me, I'm afraid.

However, I am definitely ready for "back to old clothes and porridge" as my dear old dad used to say.

Mamie Fri 27-Dec-13 08:52:03

Isn't it just that everyone makes so much fuss about Christmas and getting everyone together that makes it hard for people who don't see their families though? As I said on another thread I haven't seen my DS for Christmas for about twenty years and have never seen those grandchildren at Christmas, except on Skype. We all get on well but the practicalities of short Christmas holidays where they live and the need to travel 1000 miles makes it just too difficult. I do mind that I don't see them very often, but I am not fussed about Christmas because the journeys would be so stressful.
There is so much hype in the UK with decorations up from the end of October, masses of advertising, crowds in supermarkets, huge piles of presents and then the sales. Is that really a good thing?
I am feeling very bah humbug this morning...

Riverwalk Fri 27-Dec-13 08:55:42

Not over for me - my two grandchildren arrive from Somerset today, weather permitting.

I'll have them for three nights! tchsmile

mollie Fri 27-Dec-13 09:34:54

It's not over for us yet either, but it has nothing to do with more family gatherings etc. This year its just the two of us by choice and we are a quiet pair so no partying etc. We both hate crowds and the chaos of the run-up to Christmas so I start to hibernate about a week or so before the big day and of course that continues through Christmas, New Year and until the world returns to work and school and the sales stop. By the end of the first week of January MY world gets back to normal and right now I'm longing for that to happen... I know, I'm odd, but I'm harmless.