other women!

Spot on Mamie.

Soutra I agree with what some others have said. Sit back and enjoy the show.

Or once the bit you like is over, say "Oh I have to dash because (fill in white lie) - let me know what you decide and I'll just go along with it"

I think your idea of cutting and running is a good one jess I could plead what Terry Wogan used to call " a subsequent engagement". Some people do have too much time on their hands and a "meeting" makes them feel busy.

Soutra maybe at this time in your life you are just not a committee type? We did loads of things earlier in our lives and just simply outgrew it. Now we will help with anything on an ad hoc basis but not actually join. We are happy to donate the 'subs' and do anything else we are asked to but do not feel committed. It is so good to feel free.

Good point nonnie I have not quite acquired the knack of keeping my head down though at the critical moment! And when I see faffing and fussing and vagueness I unfortunately tend to offer rather than see them go round in ever- decreasing circles. In a small community it can be hard to escape and I do actually like my book club friends when they are not floundering in "senior moments".

I've become a volunteer at a type of museum (can't say too much for fear of identification)! I've been quite happily 'being there', walking about and generally doing what volunteers do. However, I was persuaded to attend a meeting to discuss the founding of a committee. I was quite amused to discover how suddenly quite mild-mannered ladies became quite stroppy and wanted to take over certain areas of the volunteering group, criticising the other volunteers - which is when I made my excuses and said that I couldn't be involved, due to lack of time, and the fact that I didn't 'know' committee stuff!
I actually now quite dislike some of these people - and what's so good about it is that I don't HAVE to be part of it, because I don't get paid!

I wouldn't accuse only women of dragging out committee meetings unnecessarily. In my experience, some of the worst culprits have been men who like the sound of their own voices and who focus on minor or irrelevant details, to the detriment of the main purpose of the meeting. Strong chairmanship is needed, including an ability to tell them - ever so politely - to cut the c**p. I have ceased to be on committees and, for that reason, avoid AGMs just in case someone wants to twist my arm!

I was the only woman on a large committee which organised a works leisure club. Meetings were hilarious. Only about half of them would turn up to each meeting. The chairman was deaf, and could only hear those nearest to him. He wrote his own minutes, so while he was making notes those at the other end of the table discussed everything without him. The minutes bore no resemblance whatsoever to what had actually happened, but that didn't matter, because at the next meeting those who had been present were usually absent, and those who had not made it to the previous meeting turned up and reversed all the decisions they had missed.

Wonderful description, Elegran!

Fantastic Elegran

All so familiar, Elegran. Ours were like the parish meetings in the Vicar of Dibley

, Elegran!

The most heart sinking sentence is:

Point of order Madam Chair

When I joined a school governing body (all male to that point) I really did feel like the V of Dibley. Fortunately worst offenders left. (One because i told the local authority it was not helpful to have an LA governor who wrote letters to the local paper criticising the school!!!!! So they did not renew him for a second term. )

I loved your post Elegran, very Vicar of Dibley

Elegran, sounds like the committee of the charity I used to work for....I would add that at the last meeting I was at, three of them went to sleep!