A moving piece

I thought it was very well written. It made me think about all the things that I take for granted.

Obviously the writer was "going on about it" because that's what she was writing about, and it focused on her because it is her experience.

Thank you thatbags I enjoyed the article.

And to you Ana.

I found the initial style rather ponderous, but otherwise it contained a lot of truth.
I rarely bother with lipstick, but earrings are a must! Oh! And pearls!

Happy Easter Jingl (and everyone!)

Hello soop. [Bunnysmile]

I don't expect anyone to be stoical about anything. I only read it, and commented, because it was on a thread on GN.

And thanks for your polite ness in returning my good wishes.

GN is really not worth it.

jingle

Being stoical about one's own problems is admirable, expecting someone else to be stoical about theirs is not.

Jings People "go on about it" on this forum, too, about all kinds of things. They vent their frustration and others sympathise/empathise with them or ignore it, as they want. Some who suffer from the same problems are comforted by the recognition that they are not alone. It is the same with this blog. Reading it is not obligatory, neither is expressing sympathy or recounting one's own similar troubles. She wanted to tell it as it is for her.

GK The lipstick is only one aspect of all that is impossible to some people in the grip of MS. Your friend has enough control of her speech to tell you to slow down, enough control of her legs to walk, albeit in callipers, enough control of her hands to get lipstick approximately right, enough control of her brain and her life to hold down a demanding job. She is up-beat and capable. I am pleased for her.

Elegran, her lipstick is sometimes squiff, and if I'm with her I will wipe the edges. It doesn't make her look like "a drunk" possibly because she isn't one. Also why would squiff lipstick make someone look like "a drunk"?

Elegran she can go on about it as much as she likes when talking to people on a personal level. Entirely up to her. I'm not judging that. Just don't like the article. Too much about her.

Bags unshaved legs on an ugly woman would make the matter worse.

Happy Easter Bags and elegran btw. with bunny ears. (and everone else of course)

Specially soop.

GK - your friend likes lipstick. does she put it on herself? If she does, is it accurate, or does it go all over the edges and make her look like a drunk?

I know quite a few people with MS (I was a volunteer for 10 years at an MS therapy centre) and I can vouch for it being one hell of an illness for some. It can invade every part of your life, depending on which nerves are affected, those serving walking and balance, those involved in fine movement and touch, those triggering bladder and bowel action, the optic nerve, and the cognitive processes, and all combinations and permutations of them.

I am not surprised, Jings that she "goes on about it" It is with her at every moment of the day, and whatever she is doing. In fact, what she is complaining about is the attitudes of the general population, which make her feel that her inability to do all the things that are labelled "grooming" make her somehow a second class citizen.

Frustrating is a very mild word for her position.

That should be "worked" - she retired recently.

I found the article a bit heavy going. I have a friend who is severely disabled, she wears calipers on both legs having had polio as a child and walks with great difficulty with the aid of two sticks. She works at a very demanding job and we would often spend days travelling up and down the country on trains. She's retired now, at 65.

I don't know whether she shaves her legs or not but she likes lipstick and bright coloured jewellery. Her favourite orthopaedic boots are electric pink.

Mostly when I'm with her, I completely forget that she is disabled, so much so that she sometimes chides me for rushing ahead, because she moves rather slowly. As she says "Don't diss my ability".

I thought it was a very moving piece of writing. No-one knows (unless they have experienced) what it feels like to be confined in one's own body, and the frustrations which must be felt. I just think shaved legs, etc., were really given as an example of the minor irritations in life which people with a disability are unable to do, and which lead to the bigger picture of the feeling of loss of independence.

Made me think, that article - thanks, bags. So difficult to get out of that habit of evaluating women in terms of what they look like, rather than who and how they are to themselves and others.

Shaved legs on an ugly woman do not make that woman not ugly.

Ugliness is in the eye of the beholder.

Nothing "porn-influenced" about shaving your legs.

Seems a very 'poor me' article. I'm very sorry that she has MS, but can't see why she has to go on about it like that.

And there is nothing wrong with a woman wanting to look good.

Sick of these women feeling the need to be hairy and "au naturel". Probably because they are ugly to start with.

A timely reading of this, as tomorrow I'm spending the day with a friend who is blind. I'm sure she'll be very interested in discussing this.

Heather Downs gave me a strong and clear look at these two social aspects of womanhood, which I hadn't previously co-joined in my mind.

Yes, I agree, a moving piece.

I hadn't come across 'a Room Of Our Own' before. I've now bookmarked it for further readings.