Looking back as a parent

I would change a few things, but not anything major.

When I look at how they have all turned out, I consider we must have got it all pretty well right. At the time we just sort of muddled through.

I look back and think I could have done better, but on deeper reflection I know that I did the very best I could at the time.
However, I did make sure that my kids knew that they were totally loved no matter what happened.

They still love me and show it, so I can't have been too bad!

Nobody's perfect.

Yes Mishap, I do look back and not exactly wish I'd done things differently, but perhaps been more aware of their feelings, and made more time for them.
There were times when I felt almost overwhelmed by other responsibilities - my work, DH working away from home, DM becoming dependent on us, so that the DCs took not only second place but third and fourth place at times.
Not good perhaps, but we did the best we could at the time and I'm sure you did too.

My ex-husband left us when my son was 8 and my daughter was 5. We had been living a comfortable life in New York and we had to return to the U.K. It was hard on all of us. Finding a home, a job around school time and being a lone parent. We had to do without family holidays and a car - my kids used to fly over to NY or he'd come here every other year. We lived in a small flat but luckily we lived by the sea, so although no holidays we had the beach, the countryside and the New Forest to play in. I was, still am, lucky to have wonderful friends who helped and who propped me up. Eventually I got a better job with better pay. My son went to Uni and my daughter to college. Both are doing really well in their careers and my son has presented me with 2 wonderful granddaughters.
I honestly don't think I could have done any better. I worked hard at being a lone parent and I'm now reaping the rewards. My ex said recently to my son that he envied my relationship with our grandchildren. Serves him right.

What a bad situation for all of you Mishap. Yes, there can't be many parents who can look back and say 'Wow! I got it all right, aren't I wonderful?' I often wish I could go back in time and do everything [just about, ]in a different way.But we were busy, working, looking after all of the children and possibly other family members as well, feeling tired, and with hardly any time for ourselves.It's better really, to think about the times when we got things right and not dwell on the times we did it wrong.Being a parent and not just ourselves, doesn't come with a handbook, and neither does being a grandparent.We all muddle on doing the best we can, often under difficult circumstances.