Has a lack of, or an abundance of, siblings affected your personality?

I'm the oldest of five siblings and the oldest of six cousins. I think it' made me feel burdened with responsibility and added to my feelings of anxiety. On the up side we were all close and have shared lots of good and bad times. I don't see anything of two of my siblings but the rest of us are close and I love them and it's comforting to know they care about me. I'm particularly close to my youngest sister. She's my rock in times of trouble. It's the one thing I feel blessed with. We had no money but we were a large close family. I was lucky, really lucky.

I was an only child for 11 years and envied other children with siblings. I would have loved cousins too. It helped that a close friend was an only child too though.

I am too independent, don't ask for help, have difficulties socialising and can amuse myself. I like solitary pursuits...walking, cycling, reading, gardening and steer clear of clubs and groups much preferring one to one interaction.

My half sister and half brother came along when I was 11 and 17. I was then pushed to the bottom of the pile [long story], so it was all very painful. So siblings at last but still no one to play with! We do not see each other now our mother has passed away, Christmas and birthday cards only.

I would have loved just one person in my corner when I was getting the brunt of the problems at home. I would like that now too...

I have added close relatives in this post. I am the second girl of two. My sister is 4 yrs older than me. I really don't know if it has in my case I was not very close to my sister when I was young I think the age gap made a big difference.
My personality is very different to my sister but we get on ok now although she lives 100 miles away. My female cousin was also 4yrs older than me. She had a brother born when I was eight. We got on well when when we met but he went off to NZ and Austraila at 20 when he finished an engineering apprenticeship and never really came back.

I know relationships between siblings can be difficult but from what I have observed from others I feel it would be nice to have siblings or cousins about.

I had no contact with any of my dad's relatives.
We moved away from where my mums family when I was about 4 that was only about 30 miles but not many people had cars to make family visits easy.
When I was eight we moved even further away. My grandma died when I was 10 cutting off another close relative.
I really wish I had more closely related (and located) family around when I grew up.

I think there are pros and cons to both - and, of course, every individual and family is different.

I am an only child. It didn't really bother me when I was young. I got on well with older people and was quite happy to socialise with them - not feeling embarrassed, like some children are, to be enjoying the company of adults. I still get on well with people older than me. I was a bit mollycoddled but fairly happy amusing myself and am still quite comfortable with my own company.

However, now that I'm older I would really appreciate having a brother or sister so that we could offer mutual support and share childhood memories.

Still, it seems it doesn't always work out that way and I'm quite lucky to have some good, longterm friends - which I know isn't quite the same as being related and brought up together but is still quite comforting.

I do think, though, that being an only child can tend to make me not selfish but sometimes a bit thoughtless about other people's needs. Also, I think having brothers and sisters might have made me a bit less sensitive and more able to stick up for myself in challenging social situations.

Seems to be a common thread running through with only children. Independent, don't ask for help, difficulties mixing with others. Many always wanted siblings too whereas those with siblings found them a mixed blessing.
Think we always want what we can't have.

I am an only child and can relate to a lot of the things others have said. Although I enjoy the company of friends I am quite happy to do things on my own if necessary. My DH is from a family of four but isn't in touch with any of them so a big family isn't always an advantage. I do envy people who talk of their sister being their best friend but I know at least three women whose sisters are the bain of their lives, so you never know how things would have turned out.
I know when my mother developed dementia it was actually a relief to deal with things in the way I thought best. I have seen friends familys torn apart over disagreements about care homes etc

I have one sister, much younger than me.
But what I miss is brothers. My family, back one generation, has been female - dominated, and my big mistakes in life have been due to the fact that I don't understand males! Thought they were just like us, just cut their hair short.
Strangely, both my sister and I had 2 boys. Then I had a girl.

I'm an "only" who desperately longed for siblings when I was a child my cousins were all much older and didn't live locally. When I hear friends talking about their siblings I sometimes feel wistful, but at the same time am aware that it's not always the idyllic scenario I imagine. I was painfully shy as a little girl and often felt lonely so I'm sure that contributed to me having 5! As others have said I'm inclined to be independent and hate admitting I need anything, though thankfully am much less shy and more socially able these days.

I have just the one brother who barely spoke to me growing up. So I felt like an only child. We are on better terms as adults and shared care for mum in her last few years. I don't have any affection for him and wouldn't even call him a friend but we have done favours for each other. I'm so greatful for having found H. Without him and my children life would be very lonely.
I really envy my friend and her close relationship with her brother and sister. The three families spend a lot of time together including holidays. I would love that.

I'm the eldest of 4, which was very good when our parents were in their final illnesses, as we could share the load, and, when it became necessary, the decisions. We don't see much of each other as we live quite far apart, but my siblings are still special people to me.

I'm the third of four, having a half sister and bro, 8yrs and 5yrs older. Their mother died when they were tiny. I have a brother 2yrs younger. I don't see much of any of them as we live so far away. My younger brother keeps himself apart from us all, I haven't seen him for years and years, maybe 2002. He was my mum's favourite. He doesn't have a partner or children.

My older bro I see now and then but he doesn't keep in touch and after years of trying, I can't bothered anymore myself. I always did and still do adore my sister. She has been quite ill in recent years and that fills me with fear. I am in contact with her children and their families, which is lovely.

My parents were only children, so I had no aunts or uncles and just one grandparent who lived with us. I think I felt quite lost amongst so many of us, though, and the competing demands on my mother's attention.

Oddly enough I was talking today to a friend who is an only child, married to a chap who is also an only. She said their upbringings were chalk and cheese even though they lived in the same town. Her parents made their house a home and welcomed any-and-everyone into it, it was always filled with people and busyness so she didn't feel lonely. Her dh's parents were the polar opposite. No one stepped over their threshold without very good reason and he was never allowed to bring friends home or anything. In consequence he had a lonely childhood.

I have a step-brother and a step-sister who have given my more joy than my blood sister. They are the children of my father's partner and are no blood relations though we regard each other as siblings, even though all parents are now dead.

I have a older sister who has caused me and my late parents problems throughout my life. She lives abroad but visits me once a year, which I dread. However I give her a good time as life has not been good to her and I have had a much easier life. I would have been far happier as an only child. Ironically if she dies first I suspect I will shed a tear or two.

I am the elder sister. My sister just eighteen months younger. I always felt I had to prove myself especially to my mother. First to go to Grammar school, first to Uni. I like lots of time on my own and don't suffer fools gladly. Since my mother died my sister and I have become much closer and I now really enjoy her company. But then she is very similar to me

I m an only child, I hated it didn't have any cousins my age and felt I had a fairly lonely childhood with not a lot of confidence I would have loved the fun of giggling or playing with siblings l too am independent and a bit stubborn I try never to ask anything of anybody And think I carried some of my loneliness through to adulthood

Take the shine off.

I know how you feel gilly, my younger sister was more than ten years younger than me and I had to take her everywhere I went, even if I was going to a friend's house. Having boyfriend over was a nightmare, she was six when I started seeing DH and followed us around like a puppy dog. I went from childminder to mother without a break and it did the shine off my first baby.

I know Anniebach and a 5 year age gap is quite significant when I was 13 and she was 8 . Never mind. We learn from these experiences don't we? I would have never expected my son to take his little sister along with him and they have the same 5 year age gap. Best of friends, always have been but allowed to have their own space.

Having said that my sister was always very clingy. She wouldn't sleep in her own bed and insisted in getting into mine which I hated. I think my mum just wanted a quiet life.

Gilly, that was not fair of your Mum, I was never expected to drag my siblings along

I was the middle of three children and would happily have been an only child. The age gap with my siblings was enough for us to have nothing in common. I left home on the eve of my 18th birthday and got my own room in the nurses' home.
DH is the second of four and also left home for a time to get some peace and quiet. We married as soon as we qualified.

I am the fourth of five and am the third girl sandwiched between my two brothers. One is 7 older than me and one is 7 years younger. The two eldest, girls, were 12 and 10 when I was born so always seemed like adults to me as I grew up.

I hated having their hand-me-downs, which my thrifty Mum had saved. I was a real second-hand rose! I longed to be an only one, like my best friend, who was the apple of her parents' eyes - I was certainly never that! I think they had got tired of children by the time I was born!

I have a younger sister (5 years younger) and always wished that I was an only child as whatever I did, wherever I went I was forced to take her along. I remember one particular time when I was invited for a sleepover at my friends house. Sh lived close to some old disused railway lines and we loved to play there (she was allowed, I wasn't). I was so excited about the sleepover and the potential of a great game on the railway lines, then at the last minute my mum changed her mind and said I could only go if I took my little sister along, which I really did not want to do. (looking back my mum had a bit of a cheek expecting my friends mum to take my little sister too) It was a case of either take my sister knowing she would cramp my style and "tell" about playing on the railway lines or not go at all.

I am eldest of five, had two homes , one with parents and siblings, three sisters, one brother. Abother home with Grandfather, uncle , aunt and cousin, so had best of both worlds, have a great friendship with my siblings and adored my cousin , he died three years ago and I still feel lost without him, he was my brother-cousin , so had two sets of parents and five siblings

I'm an only too. I'm fiercely independent and quite tough in some ways. I won't ask for help either, but I'm always being asked to help others. I don't mind. I hate to think people are thinking of me as needy.

The downside for me was having to deal with relatives' deaths on my own whilst having a very young child in tow. I regretted it then, I think.

DD is also an only and I'm terrified of being a burden on her.

I am/was an only child (an orphan now my parents are gone). I always wanted siblings and feel I might have had more confidence and been better at communicating when I was younger. My husband is the middle child and has nothing in common with his older brother but is very close to his younger sister and I look on her as the sister I never had. They often reminisce about their childhoods and it makes me a little sad that i have no one who knew me then. However I am very independent and also won't ask for help unless there's no choice.