All grown up children nowadays with few exceptions, seem to expect support from their parents however old they are ..I don't think they 'see' or want to seem the fact that parents are getting older, and often will health problems, In some ways, it probably is true ,,,it's the way we bought them up ,,,we were generally as a generation, always there to sort out problems help with finances ..be it rent at Uni, help to buy a house (or return to live with us), help towards buying a car, childcare, etc etc .....but whereas we generally expected to look after or help our parents this generation feels no obligation to do so ....I have seen examples of grown up children looking after parents in their home (but usually not in the British culture !) ......or they complain because the parents house will have to be sold to pay for care when they cannot or do not wish to, care for their parents. I was speaking to my cousin just last week who is concerned as he and his wife are no longer in good health and cannot drive to see their son in Newcastle as it is a seven hour journey .....the daughter is a Consultant in the NHS and has no spare time to drive down to see them except for maybe a few days of her annual holiday....the son has a job which involves him travelling the world at the drop of a hat, and my cousin is now concerned as to what will happen to him and his wife as they get more dependant and frail. They would not expect to live with either child, but would like to think the children will still bother to come and see them ....they excuse them by sayig 'oh' they have busy lives, but so did they when their children needed help with child care (driving miles to do so) help with finances through Uni, etc etc .....in my husband's case his daughter has only phoned once since Christmas, and whenever we phone she is on answerphone and doesn't ring back ! I e mail her from time to time asking if she is ok and if there is a suitable time to ring for a chat ...no answer ! I am trying to tell her that her dad has just been diagnosed with Parkinsons Disease and is not very good ....don't want any help from her, but just think she should know ! but there you are ! My own daughter has not spoken to me for ten years since we sold our big renovation project and built a much smaller bungalow (DH is 84 and I am 70 but a three time cancer survivor so we never know how long we have !) ...as she decided it wasn't worth her while as there wouldn't be much money in her 'inheritance' ....makes you wonder where we went wrong ! In my husband's case his MiL lived with him and his late wife until she died .....despite becoming more erratic as time went on ,his own mother lived until she was 98 but his sister lived nearby in London (we lived in Spain, but his mum and sister used to come and stay in the summer ) so she was the main hands on carer, but the rest of the family chipped in to help ...what hope for us ?