No friends

ebayqueen + oldbatty, it may be a good idea to start your own place named thread, then perhaps other people in your area would find it more easily?

Good luck.

sorry wrong end of the country for me . Anybody Manchester way?

Hello ,I'm new here,Living in Leigh on Sea.Are there any local members who would like to meet up ?
:-)

Thank you so much ....will do

Dgrann I didnt have any lessons, i guess i have just picked it up as my hearing got worse. Sometimes our bodies compensate when another part is failing.

Dgrann777
Lip reading classes are quite often run.
May I suggest you enquire at suppliers, such as Specsavers or Boots.
You might also ask at your local library or GP surgery, for example.

Thank you for the reply travelsafar. Did you teach yourself lip reading ?

Yes i have to deal with this. I wear a hearing aid in each ear and very often when in a group situation have to turn them both down as i get overloaded with noise from all directions.I find that if i am able to see the person who is speaking face to face then i tend to lip read and i then manage to get the jist of the conversation. I very often take aids out as i enjoy being in my muffled world when at home or alone. I find that the constant noise that they allow me to hear is very draining.I adjust them for one situation but it then is not suitable for another.

Does anyone else have the problem of not being able to hear properly in a group of people.....I have no problems with my hearing radio, television, one to one or even a small group but when there is background music etc or a large group I can’t follow the conversations so am tending to avoid these situations as I find it embarrassing. I have had a hearing test and told to come back in a year or two as I’m not ready for hearing aids.
I am enjoying this thread....I can hear you all ????
I think this problem heightens my feeling of loneliness as I come home feeling very down.

I have only one long term friend of 30 odd years but we only see each other about 4 times a year, we do write to each other inbetween though, and when we meet up its like we saw each other yesterday..I have people who i have geled with from the bowls club but i wouldnt say they are 'friends ' in the true sense of the word.My biggest friend is my sister who i see at least twice a week if not more we contact each other daily as well. It doesnt bother me about making new friends because i know a lot of people and when i go to my local town centre i always see someone to chat to so i dont feel lonely at all.But i can understand how someone else could feel very lonely without anyone in their life to call a friend.

Yes, I’m in driving distance from Preston pocket4321.just away for a couple of weeks but would love to meet up in July.

if it were as simple as " join this exciting club and make friends" everybody would have loads of friends.

I think you have to be in a certain frame of mind and fairly resilient to give it a go.

For example , a local charity shop was asking for volunteers. There was such animosity and pettiness between the manager ( who was under pressure to reach her targets) and a volunteer who criticised under her breathe to me , constantly. It was awful.

Bluebelle* and Katycrunch I found that too in my U3A. People should be told to make new members feel welcome. It takes a lot of perseverence and having to push yourself a bit if you're shy. I hate cliques. I hope I never behave like that. I did eventually meet some U3A members who were not like that at all.

Not sure if this has already been mentioned, but perhaps NWR (National Women's Register) might be useful to some posters??
www.nwr.org.uk/

Hi Lolly 69. I am in Cheshire and just wondered if you're local to me in Warrington?

Again I am an only child,though now married but at an age that sadly most dear friends have died, in Care Homes or moved away.
I have never been one to spill my whole life out to a friend.
However I do love writing and this really has proved to be my saving grace.
It is relatively easy to make new friends these days... via the internet,....and thereby over time those friendships can turn into solid ones.
So for those whom say they would love friends I can only suggest being bold and get your request noted on these chat sites...........mentioning your area,age and a few of your likes/dislikes.In the fullness of time you will meet and form a budding new friendship that with nurturing on both sides can grow into a nice deep relationship...........if this is what you are looking for.

But you have to make some initial moves yourself, for otherways, you remain without!

I am adjusting to loneliness and it is difficult, always had a large extended family, church activities, voltenteer work, it all stopped last year. My granddaughters moving away this month ,they are the only people I see. I miss my sisters, so hard that they live in the same town. Have to accept it.

I am feeling bereft. My best friend is moving some considerable distance away to be nearer her family. She has been like the sister I never had so she will be a great loss. I have a lovely husband and one or two other close friends but I feel that, as friends move or pass on, it would be good to widen my circle. I have used some ways - e.g. a magazine's 'Find a Friend' column but have found that this attracts single women who want to go on holidays or away for weekends. I don't want to engage in this sort of activity without my husband. I'd just like to find a few more like-minded women who would meet up for coffee or lunch and a chat on a regular basis. As Charleygirl suggests mentioning location, I am based in North East England within easy reach of Newcastle upon Tyne.

How comforting to read these posts. I have one friend since five years old who is like a sister. My other best friend died last year. We were so close for thirty years. We shared everything and laughed and cried together. I miss her so much.. I have friends at classes and I am in U3A although I don't attend much. It's not for everyone but may provide a degree of friendship. There are plenty of ways to have company- classes volunteering..... However close friendship is a different thing altogether . Some people make friends easily. Others don't. I don't. . That's just how it is. I find socialising one to one very tiring not helped by imperfect health (M.E.). I wish I had more energy but I don't. I wish I was more chatty but I'm not. If I really wanted more friends I think I would have made more effort over the years. I do wish I was different. I envy those I know who meet up most days for different activities and then coffee together and are jolly and chatty. We sometimes just need to be content. However I think it's great if people who are lonely on GN meet up. Good Luck ?

There are a lot of us out there. I fall between two stools in that my DH is still alive but works most of the time particularly at weekends. So I am not part of the retired couples lot or the single person group.
Filling my time during the week is easier than the weekends.
Our local Meetup is really good.

I also have no real friends I know such a lot of people but they aren't real friends. I belong to many groups which I enjoy and enjoy the people also. some groups I have been going to for as long as 10 years. But no one has become a friend outside of the groups. I have learnt from all this that most people have already formed there friendships or have a family member ..They are quite comfortable in there lives and don't require anyone else...Joining groups is rewarding but doesn't guarantee making friends.

True Elegran, the grief is the price we pay, very hard but never if we had never known that love what we would have missed.

I think that real friendship is based on many joint memories, so it (well for me) has become impossible to make new friends. Six months before I retired my second best friend died, and then six months after I retired my very best friend. I found it all extremely difficult (and, yes, it was about me!!). All the things we had planned to do when I retired disappeared.
I set out determined to make new friends and joined so many different local organisations. However, it was not to be - make lots of new aquaintances - but no friends. No-one I could just pop in when I felt down, or get them to come to me. I have now accepted this situation. Still have one friend whom I see about once a month. I have things I attend most days, but feel that the time for real friendships is long past.
One of my children still loves near me, and I usually have her and her daughter for a meal a couple of times a month. I do long weekends away visiting my other children and g.children.
So miss my bestie (even after nearly eight years), she and I would have a long phone call each evening, usually happily moaning about our children, etc. We had met when we were expecting our first babies and remained close friends for forty years. We knew things about each other that even our husbands did not. Nothing can ever replace that or fill that void.
Most of the time I am fine, but I do get lonely at times, even when I am surrounded by people. But have come to terms with the fact that friends are now a thing of the past.

I have made lots of new friends since I got a dog. Not a choice for everyone I know and not the reason I got a dog but I have made friendships that I know will last.

Not so sure about that Elegran - sometimes the pain can be unbearable and the loneliness after they are gone crushing.