Missed Opportunities (or if only I had known)

I'm off to work, shortly, washing bottoms, for the most part. I could have easily worked my way up the career ladder in this role, but didn't want the responsibility. It is what it is.. note to self: remember that when I'm complaining to myself later.

So, so many, but it's wasted effort crying over spilt milk. We have to make the most of the here and now. The clock can never be turned back.

I heard an election candidate, who polled around 200 votes, say his motto is "Whatever is happening now is just perfect."

I always wished I'd had decent career advice (not much of that for girls, where I was) and been encouraged to go to university. My parents wanted me to go but accepted me saying I didn't see the point, without coming up with any reasons why I should.

Still, there could have been some disaster in store for me, or just other regrets, if I'd done that. Who knows.

I have regrets. Everyone does (I had a poor childhood, lacked confidence and carried a lot of anxiety into adulthood, poor marriage etc) but missed opportunities, no. This question has actually made my day as, now retired, I realise I achieved everything I set out to do, both in my career and in getting a divorce 9-years-ago and subsequently marrying the love of my life.

Sometimes i think marrying the wrong man! Then again if I hadnt I would not have my lovely DS, DDIL & my wonderful DGS & DGD.
One thing I would change for sure was the accident I had at school resulting in 3 hip replacements & early medical retirement! Then there are many so much worse off than me so shouldnt complain should I?

My earliest regret is not going to a grammar school when i passed my 11+, instead went to a secondary school, where all my friends were going,
My life might have taken a different path,
Second regret getting married at 17, to an abusive man as i found out after marriage
Dont regret my children of course, third regret is getting married a second time to a worse abusive and violent man

I lack confidence thanks to childhood and lots of put downs; I see now that I could (possibly) have achieved more, but then who knows? I urge my children and grandchildren to go for everything they want to try because they are amazing, special, and 'anyone can do anything' if they try hard enough. I just hope that my encouragement, sprung from the knowledge that praise is a wonderful fertiliser, will help them achieve.

Sorry, went off the thread here. My greatest regret, not moving with my bank job to London and marrying badly instead.

Thank God he isn't - more austerity! Perhaps he only took the job at the Evening Standard so he could undermine Theresa May at every opportunity. She publicly humiliated him but he can do the same to her on a much greater scale. It will take the Conservatives a long time to recover from recent events, it was only a question of time before their austerity measures came back to bite them on the bum. Just look at the damage Clegg did to his party, and this deal with the DUP........... if it ever happens will end in tears.

I truly believe that we take the path we are supposed to...

I have had a whole host of missed opportunities. I was going to be a policewoman, and passed the exams to go to Hendon. Changed my mind.. and so on.
Then again, I mainly missed opportunities because I found I couldn't be bothered - so maybe I wouldn't have made a good police officer/social worker et al anyway?

Studied the wrong subject at university, but then if I hadn't, I might not have met DH and had the family we are so proud of, so was it wrong after all?

Another one who wishes she had more confidence in her youth. As the old adage says, youth is wasted in the young.

Bit like KatyK I wish I had been more confident. I thought other people must know more than me because they sounded so sure.
Now I know they were just more confident about expressing themselves.

I don't regret any decisions that I made when following my instincts and emotions, but I do regret some decisions I made because I thought I was being sensible instead of doing what I really wanted.

Oh and I was asked to be a 'go-go' dancer on a very popular TV show in the '60s but obviously refused through lack of confidence. Hey ho.......

No

I know Trisher , but I wouldn't change anything else , and I might have lost those positives in my alternate life :-)

I wish I hadn't let my frightening childhood strip away my confidence and hold me back from doing anything but mundane jobs. I knew I had more in me but never had the courage to do anything more. I never felt as good as other people, which I now know at this late stage in my life is ridiculous.

My one regret is not emigrating to New Zealand. I had all the necessary qualifications, a large mental health hospital in Wellington was recruiting nurses from Britain, but just before we were ready to sign all the paperwork my DH got cold feet. His mother had breathing difficulties and was becoming physically frail and her didn't want to leave the country. As it happened, she went to live with her daughter. By then my daughter had a place at university and my son was in high school. Where would we have been, and what would life have been like if we'd gone? I'll never know.

Me too Tizliz (the getting pregnant at 17) I had to give up a decent job too and move into one that earned more money without the prospects. Like you I would be looking forward to a nice retirement (like many of my friends of the time) instead of working in this damned awful place, all on my own for washers and NO prospect of ever retiring. (DH's and mine own business too) I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy!

Getting pregnant at 17, only because I had to give up my place at library college. Never really had a career after that, just admin type jobs. I could be retired now on a nice pension instead of still working (own business admittedly).

So many! Not big ones, just little ones - if only I had been more assertive and stood up for myself. I am only just learning to do so and this morning stood up to a bully who stomped off in a very childish fashion. Instead of feeling I had caused a problem I told myself that it should be possible to have a reasonable discussion where we disagreed without her losing her temper at me. Must do more of this.

Funny isn't it, but if you believe in multiple universes there is somewhere a you with a Computing Degree.

Great question Trisher.

There's pretty much only one missed opportunity that I'm sorry about .

I took an entrance test in 1977 for Computing Science at the University of Belfast . I passed and they offered me a place on their first ever computing degree. The very day I got the results I was offered a job as Head of Security at the Queens Residence . We were newly married , living on a military salary and the money was too good to turn down.

So I gave up my place at the university.

I did go back and do a degree in 1991 but that took me on another path. I wonder where my life would have taken me getting in on the ground floor of a technological revolution. Not a regret but I do sometimes wonder.