Gransnet forums


Bully made to run to school

(55 Posts)
MissAdventure Mon 12-Mar-18 08:22:51

A ten year old boy was banned from the school bus for three days for bullying.
His dad decided he could run the mile to school, and posted the video on social media.
He has had mixed reactions, but has said he believes he has done the right thing.
His son also agrees with him.
What do you think?

Iam64 Mon 12-Mar-18 08:29:10

I can't help wondering if having a father who behaves like a bully influences this boys behaviour.
Of course there should be consequences for bullying behaviour but public humiliation? No.

MawBroon Mon 12-Mar-18 08:29:30

I think posting a video on social media is about as low as you get.
By all means support the punishment imposed by the bus company but surely public punishments like executions went out a couple of centuries ago?
There is also the risk that he may feel his “moments of fame” make it all worth while and feel something of a hero.
Neither scenario seems to be the right one.

sodapop Mon 12-Mar-18 08:34:31

Like Iam64 I think the punishment was needed but not making it so public. Seems to be the norm now that every aspect of our lives is put out for public consumption.

MissAdventure Mon 12-Mar-18 08:35:34

BlueBelle Mon 12-Mar-18 08:35:58

Well thats a bullying punishment so he ll learn nothing only how to bully better
no wonder the chap was a bully obviously his fathers is a bully

wildswan16 Mon 12-Mar-18 08:38:51

I have no problem with dad telling him to run to school. I do have a problem with dad posting it on social media.

janeainsworth Mon 12-Mar-18 08:50:21

I agree with iam that the bullying behaviour by the father is likely to perpetuate bullying behaviour in the son.

But I’d also like to know what the school does to prevent bullying and how it deals with it when it happens.
It isn’t only the parent’s responsibility and although I’m not condoning the father’s behaviour, maybe he felt frustrated that the school wasn’t doing enough to help his son’s behavioural problems.
Just being banned from the bus isn’t at all constructive.

Chewbacca Mon 12-Mar-18 08:52:50

Easy to see where the child got his bullying tendencies from isn't it? The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

Oopsadaisy12 Mon 12-Mar-18 08:54:17

As Chewbacca says, poor child, he will never learn with a parent acting like that.

MissAdventure Mon 12-Mar-18 09:13:52

I don't think there is anything wrong with the punishment.
Its harsh, but fair.
His dad says there isn't any way he was going to drive his son to school, as that is an occasional treat for the children, so would be inappropriate.
I can't bear everything being posted on Facebook though, so wouldn't have done that.

Anniebach Mon 12-Mar-18 09:22:20

modern version of the stocks

gummybears Mon 12-Mar-18 09:54:53

I wouldn't have made him run, but a nice long walk in the fresh air twice a day would give ample opportunity for reflection on the need to not be an arse on the bus.

I don't believe any form of child discipline, consequences etc should ever be put on social media. That is absolutely private between parent and child.

GrannyGravy13 Mon 12-Mar-18 09:57:08

The Father and Son were on GMB this morning, I thought the Father was overbearing, the Son looked forlorn and intimidated, it was not nice to see. Why any parent would want to publicly humiliate their child, I do not understand. Is this part of the "2 minutes of fame" culture?

ReadyMeals Mon 12-Mar-18 10:06:53

Well the mere fact the boy accepted his punishment and ran to school means he is likely to grow up a decent caring law-abiding human being. The ones who are going to be real problems would have either stood there defiantly or kept turning round and whining etc - or in some cases (if they were with a single mother) actually hit the parent.

janeainsworth Mon 12-Mar-18 10:10:53

readymeals I don’t understand your reference to a single mother. What do you mean exactly?

BlueBelle Mon 12-Mar-18 10:16:04

Well we weren’t in his home so really no idea how the lad reacted to the punishment at the time Readymeals I m sure he would seem intimidated on TV, which is further bullying showing him up before thousands of viewers what next walk round with a notice round his neck
Let him walk to school fine
Making him run and posting on social media extremely bullying and going on TV is dreadful a very very poor reaction on the fathers behalf as he is just perpetrating the bullying and showing him up
The other thing is did anyone bother to find out what the boy was bullying for it could be that he was standing up to some bullies or even got caught up in some action himself

ReadyMeals Mon 12-Mar-18 10:22:36

Jane, I mean kids who do hit parents rarely hit their fathers, or their mothers if the father defends her. Usually the parents who get hit by their children are mothers who are either alone or are not respected by their husbands.

radicalnan Mon 12-Mar-18 10:41:33

I was shocked by the punishment and the broadcasting of it.

To see the boy on television this morning was mortifying for me, what sort of person have I become that I can watch that display of ritual humiliation? I was just sucked in to it all.

The father is a bully, clearly his ego is boosted because he has had all this publicity for his parenting 'skills' but his child's face told us all we need to know.

It would not surprise me if the boy doesn't have a break down or become really violent later.

He is a young boy, making him walk to school was enough, to reduce him to a figure of ridicule is cruel. What can he have learnt from this ?

Clearly his dad sees himself as some sort of hero, all at the expense of his own child. No wonder kids go berserk and run about with guns if this is the power politics that go o at home, where does a child have to go for guidence and comfort in a family like that.

I would have been furious with a child of mine bullying but that would have been between me and them and their victims. I don't think we ever had that problem, plenty of other problems of course that were just dealt with but that poor boy, just makes me want to weep.

OldMeg Mon 12-Mar-18 10:51:57

Making him get to,school under his own steam, fine!

As for the rest of it, no wonder the boy was a bully if that was his male role model. What’s mother got to say about this - if indeed she had any say?

Aepgirl Mon 12-Mar-18 10:58:33

My heart goes out to this lad. Parents can be embarrassing without meaning to, but to show a boy up like this is inexcusable. No wonder the boy is a bully - he is just copying his father.

Lynnebo Mon 12-Mar-18 11:00:41

Oh for heavens sake, his father isn’t a bully, he is using discipline, which is rarely seen these days. Would you rather the child had been beaten in private?
By posting it on social media the family of the bullied child could see the bully hadn’t got away with it. Check out the Father’s facebook page if it bothers you. That boy isn’t intimidated at all and accepts his punishment.
I’d bet he won’t be bullying again!

OldMeg Mon 12-Mar-18 11:05:52

Totally disagree with you Lynnebo there’s a difference between giving out a punishment and glorifying in the publicly.

“Look at me! Aren’t I the strong parent?” 🤔🙄

Wonder if he was paid a fee?

barbaralynne Mon 12-Mar-18 11:21:21

I didn't see GMB so just checked it out. This family live in Virginia, USA. I kind of think that if that father had been living in the UK, he might have had a different reception from our social services. People in this country (UK) tend to look on that sort of behaviour more as child abuse and unacceptable.

M0nica Mon 12-Mar-18 11:22:35

Not helpful at all. At least the school now know why the boy is a bully.