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Town or country for retirement?

(85 Posts)
Menopaws Wed 16-May-18 20:18:16

We are not retiring yet but discussion happened today as we went to a funeral in what, I considered, was the perfect village. Pub, church, beautiful little stone cottages, brook running through etc etc. I said how much I would like to live somewhere similar but husband said he would rather move to a town. Now I did know this but that was years ago so no big surprise but still interesting.
We are happy where we are so not cause for a marital but what do others think if this was or has been a dilemma?
I do like a town and he likes country but it's a long term move that made us think.

Nvella Sat 19-May-18 08:37:25

I live in the middle of London and as I get older I realise it’s perfect - brilliant transport, large teaching hospital at the end of the road (!), every kind of shop, restaurant, cinema within walking distance. My son and family live in a small village and I would go crazy there within weeks.

NfkDumpling Sat 19-May-18 09:19:51

We used to live on the outskirts of Norwich backing woodland. A lovely city and a good bus service just outside the door. But - we needed to drive to shops, doctors, etc., etc. So we moved when in our early 60s to a small market town in north Norfolk. We’re so glad we did. Now there’s a large estate just the other side of the wood where there was open fields and the road is a nightmare. We moved at a young enough age to make new friends and settle into our new area but close enough to keep old friends. There’s a reasonable bus service into Norwich and out to the coast. It would be perfect except that the only property we could agree on is a house with no downstairs bedroom. Still it stops us getting bungalow knees!

NfkDumpling Sat 19-May-18 09:21:56

A friend, also wanting to downsize, moved into the centre of Norwich. It’s a lovely new property and, as she says, she can hop on a bus to the countryside or beach anytime. It’s horses for courses.

jackie74 Sat 19-May-18 15:04:20

I have been married for 54 years and now my husband and i are retired , its not turning out to be the dream I imagined.
We are not getting along very well although we both have activities and hobbies so its not that -the problem ( which if I'm honest ) has always been the he will not talk or discuss things to sort rifts like we are having at present. We either row with each other or descend into long unbearable silences , which on a beautiful day like today is making feel awful. Would be glad of anyone who can help me to feel better. As my husband has always ben this way I don't think he will change now and being 74 I think there is no other option than to endure this lifestyle.
What do you think?

glammanana Sat 19-May-18 18:49:04

We live in a quiet area very close to the River Front on The Mersey and are very lucky to have all amenities close by to our home.
There is a really good regular bus route which takes you over to Liverpool then on to Southport/North Wales so we are very lucky.
The local shops have a good chemist who delivers if needed and our Doctors surgery is close by we also have 2 really 1st class Hospitals just off the motorway which we can get to within 15mins,we have always lived in this area both being born and raised nearby I would never consider moving as we have the best of both worlds.

annep Mon 21-May-18 09:03:38

We live in a nice house South facing garden but I don't like the small town we live in. This is where we started our life together about ten years ago. ( both 67). Plus side is its close to good public transport- short walk to trains, shops etc. My husband is not very open to anything new/departure from routine etc so no chance of him moving. Both people are important in a relationship however. Our compromise was to buy a very nice mobile home in a lovely area beside sea and mountains where we spend time from May to end September. Not too expensive and gives me something to look forward to.

HotTamales Tue 22-May-18 12:57:32

My post will echo a lot of previous posts.

I was born and brought up in the middle of nowhere, in many ways it was idyllic until we were teenagers and wanted to get out more.

Now DH and I live semi-rurally, I would love to live out in the sticks again, we’re only mid to late 40s and we’ve agreed that our next house move will be our last. We talk about living in the countryside properly, I would love to.

However, DH is pragmatic. His parents moved from a city to a well known national park which is very isolated. It is lovely but there are no public transport links and when FiL developed a health problem in his mid 60s things became very difficult for them.

MiL won’t drive in the dark and the round trip of getting to the hospital for visits took all day. It’s the same now that he needs regular check ups.

I think a large village/small town very close to a larger conurbation with a main hospital and good transport links is a good compromise. I really don’t wish to sound morbid!

We live about 20 minutes from our DGCs and I wouldn’t miss them growing up for the world. That is another consideration for me.

Belgravian Wed 23-May-18 09:36:25

I've retired early but was struck down and hospitalised last year.

I had not long bought my forever home. I appreciate having the best of both worlds by being near to amenities such as shops, doctors, hospital, motorway all within reach but also very close to beaches, woods/forests and country parks as my dogs are my passion.

Before I moved I was interested in living fairly remote but I'm glad I didn't as being ill made me realise how much you need to be near civilisation!

Belgravian Wed 23-May-18 09:37:54

Sorry, struck down sounds like I got hit by a truck! grin. I meant that out of the blue I was suddenly struck down by illness.