Explaining things to my grandsons

Nankate. if your grandson asked about 'that lady' I'm wondering why you had to say he was a man. I'd have just said at once that maybe she's off out to a party or just likes wearing those clothes. Unless you thought at 8 he needs to know some people might look like a woman or man but be the other. I am not sure that matters either. After all, women wear trousers.

So happy for people allowed to just be people nowadays. And feel so sad for the years of torment of yesteryears ?

I remember taking my eldest grandson to a panto when he was around 5. The principal 'boy's was announced..here comes Prince William. My grandson stood up and said very loudly 'but that's a woman's. It did bring laughter. Yes children just accept... You did brilliantly explaining to your grand children in a simple way they could understand.

This reminds me of my youngest GD's baptism nearly 7 years ago. One of her godmother was her father's cousin, who arrived at church wearing leathers, short hair, piercings. Her partner was a very pretty petite blonde and both female
The baptism was in my church but our ministry at the time never turned a hair! When they'd arrived I'd welcomed them then had to hide a smile when told they were godparents. Neither my D or SiL had thought to warn me, but no-one was anything but friendly.

I am not sure I could take my DH seriously in women’s clothes Hildagard . You must be a very special person to accept it within your marriage . I’m just wondering if you knew about this side to him when you married/fell in love? I’m not trying to poke fun, just genuinely curious .

gillybob yes I knew about this before we married, and I fell in love with the whole person. I have the best of both worlds, a best girlfriend, husband and lover. Very interested in clothes which is great when we go shopping.

Did anyone see the racing driver Charlie Martin on breakfast TV last week - she explained transgender really well.
Grayson Perry explains his need to wear women's clothes ( a totally different thing) in his biography.
I recommend both to you.

EllanVannin
Yes, I saw that programme too. They looked a-ma-zing ?????

I couldn't take a man dressed as a woman, seriously. They almost always over-egg the egg. Too much make-up, too many bits of jewellery and exaggerated mannerisms not to mention big hands, feet, noticeable stubble and Adam's apple.
It just looks laughable.

Gabriellea54 you would be very surprised, they are among you!

Not here where I live, I guarantee that. I wouldn't be bothered if there were, there just aren't any out and about.

Bredhead59 if I looked half as good as Charlie Martin I would be one extremely happy bunny.

Thank you for your very honest reply Hildagard . I suppose if you knew about his cross dressing before you married and you were okay with it then that’s fine . If I’m honest I’m not sure I could cope/ deal with it, maybe I’m shallow? I don’t know .
I do completely understand with your comment “falling in love with the whole person” though. x

I wonder if those people who 'can't coped with cross dressing' can explain what they see is so wrong with it?

I can think of much worse hobbies/interests and women frequently dress in male attire and are not censured.

It truly is beyond me to see why this is regarded in a negative way.

I used to serve a very nice customer who had long blonde hair tied back in a pony tail and usually wore jeans and a jumper. Only her deep voice gave her away. I once complimented her on her lovely skin and she told me it was a side effect of the hormones she was taking.

gillybob my husband says , you are not shallow at all, some people can accept it other can’t. Cross dressers just have to accept that is the case.x

It is strange though that women are allowed to wear trousers and shirts but men can't wear dresses. I remember my mum being a bit shocked when I got my first pair of trousers with a zip at the front-only men's trousers had them according to her, women's trousers had zips at the side. Things have changed so much for women. Perhaps we should let men change as well.

I just can't get my head around why some people get so excercised about what other people choose to wear. What does it matter if a man chooses to wear dresses, or make up, or generally dress as a woman? Why does it matter so much to some people? I just can't see how one person's choice of dress impacts on anyone else. I'm not referring to anyones post on this thread, per se, just generally.

"men can't wear dresses" but they can wear kilts, not a dress, but a skirt at least.

My 4 year old gs was outraged when we were going on a muddy walk and I suggested that he wear a pair of his sister's old wellies, as we didn't have any others, they had an incy wincy bit of pink on them. "I just can't wear those, they're girls" he protested, I did tell him that no one would be looking at his feet and making judgements, fell on deaf ears, he wouldn't have it. Anyway I've bought him a suitably macho pair of his own with spacemen on them, only they could be space women, who's to know under the spacesuits they're wearing, but there's a blue background that's the main thing and no pink God forbid

A friend of mine lives in Brighton and she told me about a drag queen who resides there, the wonderfully named, "Betty Swallocks" perhaps that's who your grandson spotted NanKate

I’ve just checked online and found a picture of Betty Swallocks, definitely not the one who lives in the village who is about 25 tall, slim, wears turquoise, lots of make up filly matching parasol and walks his parents little dog most days. The man who runs the very nice coffee shop who looked straight to me until my DS told me to look at his very colourful pedicured nails in his sandals. I believe he just dresses up at the weekend.

I love the atmosphere in Brighton where everyone is welcome, even a couple of old pensioners like DH and myself. ??

Frilly not filly !

Chewbacca Remember the outraged ranting on about Boy George's dress and makeup choices?

I later read it made his life a misery and was, in part, why he turned to drugs - I just hope "the outraged" were proud of themselves for causing such distress.

He's now a 'raw vegan' and involved in charitable works as well as performing his music.

My motto is: if they're not forcing me to do it; and they're not harming anyone else by doing it and what they're doing is not illegal.. It's bugger all to do with anyone else. Live and let live.

I have been following this thread since it’s inception, I’d like to add my experience if I may.
I have a close cross dressing pal who I’ve known for sometime our friendship is entirely platonic warm and close I couldn’t wish for a better friend. Most of the time he only crossdresses in my home and I never thought eight years ago I would find myself where I am today regarding this wonderful person. Relationships come and go friendship are usually forevermore x

If your husband is interested Hildegard ( he may already know and not need it) the Beaumont Society gives excellent support and info for men who like to cross dress. I agree this is sometimes seen with more curiosity than the gay community