causing offense?

For those of you who still don't get why terms such as ginger nut are offensive, please read this. www.unilad.co.uk/featured/why-is-ginger-bullying-one-of-the-last-acceptable-prejudices/

I don't think people are more offended nowadays over this than they used to be. What's new is that people feel more able to speak out about it offending them. I was a shy child and being pointed out as having an unusual colour of hair was excruciatingly to me, because I hated the attention focused on me.

Also, it's never just the one person that makes these comments. It's every bl**dy day, it never stops.

sue people don’t care that they are being offensive though. they meant it nicely and anyone offended just needs to get over it.

Basically, unwilling to change but blaming it on others.

I mean I get it. It’s hard to change.
It’s much easier to be rude, and then blame people for being offended

Ain't that the truth, Summerlove.

If someone is really lucky, they get the Triple Crown, they get to be rude they get to be offended that someone thought they were rude and then they get to feel bullied by people telling them they were rude

Men have always been allowed to be rude. They feel it’s their birthright, women have never been allowed to be rude until they hit a magical old age. How dare we try to take this away from some women. They’ve been waiting there entire lives to hit this magical age where they can be rude and everyone just has to except it

Oops sorry summerlove confused them with the embarrassed emoji?

Triple crown!

Yes, extremely ofensive.

d comment | Report | Private message Summerlove Sat 05-Oct-19 19:36:58
Men have always been allowed to be rude. They feel it’s their birthright, women have never been allowed to be rude until they hit a magical old age. How dare we try to take this away from some women. They’ve been waiting there entire lives to hit this magical age where they can be rude and everyone just has to except (sic) it

I can’t accept this summerlove
Fortunately the men in my life - father, brother, Paw and my three SILs absolutely do not fit the stereotype you describe. I am not sure what it says about your experience but if you have hadvto put up with this sort of behaviour, you have my sympathy.

You’re fortunate then Maw!

I didn’t say that all men are rude though, just that they have always been allowed to be. Nobody ever called them on it.

the pigeons , the, someone, amongst, times, fun, set, cat

I an not a redhead but would find that rude.
A simple comment on his lovely hair and how yours used to be the same would be much better received.

Everyone is entitled to their view without the bitchy comments. If you feel you're being targeted....report them.

who?

This is getting out of hand and a long way from OP - who most of us think could have chosen her words more carefully.

I always called my oh ginge has he had a lovely head of red hair. Can't call him that now as he hasn't much hair and it's gone grey. Still love him though. That was his nickname and no offence was taken .

Fennel, if you were called many teasing names at school, why oh why bring up the same thing?

I think that has been explained.
So, the thread shows that some people are offended, some not.

Probably wiser to err on the side of caution.

Many of the people on here who have red hair or whose children/grandchildren have red hair do not like the terms "gingernut" "ginger" "carrot top", etc. A few don't mind.

Given that many people find it hurtful and offensive, why use any of these terms? And do the people who keep moaning about the "PC brigade" feel that any way they are addressed or described would be OK for them - "old dear", "elderly" "OAP" "pensioner", etc. etc?

Sorry Fennel the PC brigade are clearly out in force on this thread - there is nothing inherently wrong with "ginger" to describe a readhead, especially when used by another redhead. The upshot of this discussion appears to be that nobody should ever say anything about anyone's hair ever! I have several redheads within my family who really wouldn't care about being called "ginger". Overreaction much?

well, either you care about other people's feelings and want to inform yourself so as best to respect them, or you don't.
seem to be two tribes.
I find the couldn't care less, it's their problem if they're offended, tribe to be exhibiting micro-aggression, which must wear people down if you're on the receiving end.
it' s like everyday sexism; too little to complain about, too frequent to be insignificant.

A poster said that a female commentator complaining about a male commentator calling her "love" was being silly.

I absolutely disagree. It implies one person having some sort of authority over another, rather than them being on equal footing. Would a man usually call his male colleague "love" or would a junior employee call a senior manager/director "love"? (Not that I think such terms are an acceptable way for a senior employee to address a junior one - just pointing what the use of such familiar terms implies.)

To me it's a ridiculous argument saying "I was always hit/caned/shouted at/called names, etc, etc when I was a child and it hasn't done me any harm".

One person may well have experienced one or more of these things during their childhood and come out relatively unscathed but we are all different and another person may have been deeply affected and damaged by such events. And sometimes those who are so emphatic that "it never did me any harm" are not the best people to judge.

The point is, why use terms that many people find offensive and hurtful?

notanan your nut is your head so why would you think ginger nut referred to public hairs which are not generally on display?

Yes, I suppose it could be considered derogatory but it was more often used in an affectionate way.
DS still calls his sister ginger nut and she will give him a friendly shove in response.

Don't worry, Fennel, it was meant in a kindly fashion.