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Have been threatening....

(30 Posts)
hazel93 Sun 08-Dec-19 15:57:58

now I've done it !
After countless attempts ,since around this time last year, have tried , unsuccessfully, to get OH to go through his wardrobe and bag up stuff that either nobody would be seen dead in today or now a tad small ( being kind ).
As he will not be home until Friday and with a free morning I went for it.
Now feeling rather guilty - what do you think ?

notanan2 Sun 08-Dec-19 15:59:51

I think its totally out of order. They are his things. I would be furious with you.

Smileless2012 Sun 08-Dec-19 15:59:53

I've done it more than once to Mr. S.'s wardrobe and he never noticedtchgrin.

MissAdventure Sun 08-Dec-19 16:01:40

I'd be over the moon if I could find someone to do this for me.

Oldandverygrey Sun 08-Dec-19 16:05:07

I wouldn't like to see the disappointment on my husband's face if I took such action!

hazel93 Sun 08-Dec-19 16:16:48

Maybe I should have added that anything which I know evokes
memories or has a special significance I would not dream of getting rid of .
I'm not callous simply practical !

Septimia Sun 08-Dec-19 16:21:32

Can't say I blame you, but I'd be a bit annoyed if they were my things.

Maybe you can soften it by saying that those are the things that you think need to go and would he please check them - and that you've already kept the special things. Obviously you risk them all being kept if you do that, but even a 50% throwout rate would make a difference.

TrendyNannie6 Sun 08-Dec-19 16:24:59

I would do it if he was busy doing something else, but I would show him and ask him but would never just go into his wardrobe and throw things out, I’d have a blue fit if he started clearing mine out

Pudding123 Sun 08-Dec-19 16:25:21

Please keep us posted whether or not he notices!

Elegran Sun 08-Dec-19 16:26:37

I would put all the things into a bag that I thought should go, and ask him to look through them for any special "keepers" - emphasising that in my opinion it could all go to the charity shop, but that his is the final decision.

How would you feel if he went through all your kitchen utensils while you were away, and got rid of half of them without asking you?

Starblaze Sun 08-Dec-19 16:28:02

I wouldn't dream of touching my husbands wardrobe, I can easily shut the door on it and not worry about what is inside. I really cannot understand why anyone would think this was ok. I think it is a bit controlling and devalues the other person and their things for no real reason.

Jaycee5 Sun 08-Dec-19 16:32:31

It depends on the relationship but it seems a bit bossy and infantalising. Is his wardrobe really a problem?

Starblaze Sun 08-Dec-19 16:35:16

An element of what TrendyNannie said:

Would you be ok with husband going through your wardrobe and throwing away what he thought you shouldn't keep?

I honestly won't believe anyone who says yes.

Maggiemaybe Sun 08-Dec-19 16:37:38

I'd be skipping the country, OP. DH would go ballistic. As would I if he started on my tat precious things.

MerylStreep Sun 08-Dec-19 16:51:57

Hazel
First of all I'll say that it would never get to that stage where there had to be a big clear out as I can't stand keeping anything that isn't worn/useful/ beautiful to look at.

But if I did I would do it gradually 😉 I have been known to lie when OH has said where are my so and so shoes the ones I threw out because he obviously bought them without me being there and giving the look: meaning, your not wearing those going out with me 😄

Calendargirl Sun 08-Dec-19 16:54:08

I would never throw away other people’s stuff without asking them, as would hate for anyone to do that to me.
However, I might bag up certain items and put to one side. After a while, if he hadn’t noticed, I would show him them and point out they hadn’t been missed, so are they really needed?

HettyMaud Sun 08-Dec-19 16:55:13

I bet he won't even notice.

Oopsminty Sun 08-Dec-19 16:56:47

My husband wouldn't notice

But I'm just as bad as he is

Both our wardrobes are filled with clothes we'll never wear again

Maybe one day

Callistemon Sun 08-Dec-19 16:57:06

DH is better at culling his wardrobe than I am mine; however, he does tend to hang on to old jumpers with holes which he likes to wear in the garden.

I have been known to put my fingers in the holes and rip them until they're unwearable.

Callistemon Sun 08-Dec-19 16:59:02

He does keep hinting that I should go through my wardrobe(s) though

Luckygirl Sun 08-Dec-19 17:17:02

I am hoping to downsize soon and do need to get rid of a lot of my OH's clothes - there is not a great deal of room for stuff in the NH. I did broach the subject with him and he just said he wanted to choose a suit to be buried in. sad

cornergran Sun 08-Dec-19 17:29:42

Mr C says go ahead if I offer to ‘sort’ his wardrobe. Once sorted I present him with a pile of clothes I believe need to be re-homed. He does look, sometimes something will go back in the wardrobe more often he says they can all go as otherwise he’d have to try them on to check fit. We both know how much he dislikes trying on clothes. A bit of a game really but it works.

annep1 Sun 08-Dec-19 17:30:40

I do what Calendargirl suggested. I would never just cull OH wardrobe. Or any of his things. Can't wait to hear how he took it..

How would you feel if he went through all your kitchen utensils while you were away, and got rid of half of them without asking you?
As husband shares the cooking I don't consider them mine.

Grammaretto Sun 08-Dec-19 17:33:51

Good on you! I am with you. I found 15 slightly grubby white shirts when I ventured into DHs wardrobe. But it was the moths which really purged it. He hadn't worn his suits and ties since retiring from the office.
I probably told him but he didn't notice.

hazel93 Sun 08-Dec-19 18:01:16

Thank you !
Normally I would not dare to touch his things but even with what I consider ample storage in our bedroom, each wardrobe/chest of drawers in our spare rooms is now almost full of his clothes.
No amount of persuasion has worked so today I decided I'd had enough.
Black bags now in the garage .