Table manners

I to hate bad table manners.
It is horrible to see so many people not using cutlery properly.
I am amazed that so many Brits use their fingers to eat I saw two adults picking roasters up with their fingers in a Toby.
Has anything good come from the USA ?.

I'm right handed and always have my knife in my left hand my sister who is left handed eats with knife in right hand.

The thing I can't abide is elbows on the table and shovelling food in with a fork.

timetogo I think you may just have insulted our American Gnetters with your question!

Bit narrow minded I think. I have arthritis and numbness in my left hand and find it easier to eat using a fork as it hard for me to hold a fork in that hand. No one has accused me f bad manners.

I should have added - get a life if such a small issue is so big for you.

Table manners vary from place to place. I have always been told that the custom of cutting all your food up and then eating it with your fork held in your right hand is American, acceptable there, but not in Europe.

In Denmark we tilt our soup plates towards ourselves in order to get the last mouthful onto our spoon. As a child in Scotland I had to remember that there you tilt your soup plate away from yourself, but a dessert plate towards yourself.

In Denmark you may rest your hands on the tablecloth, but I remember being told that in Britain they must stay on your lap, if you are not using them to eat.

Here you may pick the meat off poultry using your fingers to hold the bone, in France this would be the height of bad table manners.

In Scotland you butter a piece of bread, add jam then eat it. Some of the girls at school who came from the south of England had been taught to put a knob of butter and a spoonful of jam on the side of their plate, and butter the bread and add jam a mouthful at a time.

Hahaha! I love this! No filter! I feel the same, though. And noisy eaters who smack their lips - disgusting! And people who pronounce the letter H as ‘haitch’, instead of ‘aitch’.

Knives are for meat. Once I became a vegetarian, there was nothing to cut up! So I only use a fork to eat with. (On the odd occasion I need a knife eg scrambled egg on toast, I cut the toast into bite-sized pieces, and leave the knives in the kitchen)

I'm with Craicon and Dizzy on this. Blimey! What I really want is for our joint friends/family eating occasions to be happy and memorable. Usually successful.

dizzygran - I don't think the rules of etiquette need apply to someone with medical issues, and no-one would expect cutlery to be held correctly if someone has a problem doing so. But we're talking about the little ones, who should be taught correct table manners so they can carry that knowledge through their lives. Would you want them to one day look a fool when eating at a prestigious event with beautiful cutlery and white folded napkins?

Having a congenital deformity of my left hand, and in common with others who may not have the full use of one or other hand for visible or invisible conditions, it is quite upsetting to think that others may be judging the way we hold cutlery. I do hold and use my cutlery correctly but it was a struggle for me as a child to do so. I think that as already said, there is no right or wrong way, given different cultures, just different ways. However I agree wholehearted over feeling disgusted at people talking with their mouths full, especially when they're on the phone to you and making slobbering noises in your ear! Disgusting!

I think good table manners are very important, especially when eating out. The worst is seeing someone holding the fork like a dagger to 'spear' the food while cutting it.
Now that I live alone, I often sit in an armchair while eating. I cut up the food beforehand so I can eat it with just a fork. However, I don't do this while eating out.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

It’s perfectly acceptable to eat certain foods with only a fork held in the right hand: risotto, pasta etc

Sorry wrong post lol. Also I do think table manners important x

Sue Donim - this is the usual American way of eating and I think lots of people try to emulate this to varying degrees and I hate to see it.
As for Dilythegardener and her dil's habits they are the same as I was taught as a child ie don't reach in front of anyone without an 'excuse me' and wrists only on the table and I was very far removed from a finishing school. Strange how we all vary.

our family .always sits at a table for meals.knife and fork.ok i do admit that i pick some things up with my fingers .like chiocken drum sticks.but yes its a usa thing. but i still like my knife and fork...

BBbevan not everybody is right-handed. I am right-handed but eat 'left-handed'. I have a cousin who is left-handed who eats right-handed. Why should that be a problem? I do agree with the importance of table manners though.

We always eat at the table, never just sat with trays in front of the tv as many seem to nowadays.
One thing the GC’s do at our house is ask if they may leave the table, something I expected our own children to do, but not something my own parents insisted on for my sister and me.

I like good table manners and have all the right cutlery to use.
I am not a snob in any sense of the word but am surprised that no ones mentioned about the full set of cutlery that can be used as in silver service laying up. I had an aunt who worked in that area and she took me with her to the restaurant a few times. So the layout being fish knife and fork laid on the outside of the next course of main meal knife and fork . Then at the top you have desert spoon and fork and soup spoon if there is a soup on the menu. It looks good when set up and I do a lay out like that at Christmas although no-body ever uses the fish knife and fork but at least it's there if they want it.
These days I have arthritis in left hand and gets painful at times. I like various curries and rice so no need of knife for me as all in bite size pieces and mostly I just use a fork.
Eldest daughter can surprise me as sometimes when out at a restaurant if she has desert she will use fork and spoon obviously depending on what desert she has.
Small tip for anyone with disability in hands as I saw another post from someone who has that there is specialist cutlery you can get online for disability of the hands I have some myself.

I am left handed I hold a fork in my left and the knife in my right hand. However I also use a spoon with my left hand.
I also use scissors in my right hand but my sister who is also left handed has left handed scissors which I cannot use! If i were to stab someone I would use my right hand lol. Tennis racquet in my right hand. I would hold a golf club in my right hand, darts with my right hand. I had to learn to knit like a right handed person (the school teacher couldn't help me otherwise and I can sew and paint (as in DIY with both hands). Drawing and painting pictures with my left. I use both to pick up a drink. I confuse myself sometimes lol!

My AC has disabilities which mean that he struggles with cutlery. I'm afraid vampirequeen et al would find him very bad mannered.
Maybe people need to engage brains before being so judgemental.

Oh Silverlady333 you quote If I were to stab someone I would use my right hand lol. That's a rather horrible comment maybe just tell us about the table manners. No offence to you as you have your right to have your own opinion on your posts.

Knspol, that’s interesting. I’ve spent a lot of time in the US, as my son has lived there for almost two decades, but I don’t think it’s how all Americans eat, by any means. I’ll be observant next time I visit!

I hate eating hot food with my fingers. I’ll eat a burger or a pizza with my hands if I must but if cutlery is available, I’ll use it. I just don’t like having messy hands, never have.

My GS (9 years) used to use his cutlery as it was meant to be. Now, I was astounded at his table manners last time I saw him. Chips just picked up from plate, no attempt to use a fork, held the fork like a dagger stabbing a sausage until cut into pieces and then just speared each piece holding up like a banner. I commented to him about using his fork and knife properly and I was just told that is how he does it. His parents always eat at the table, use cutlery as we know it to be used so no idea where this has come from.