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This house eats things!

(79 Posts)
phoenix Tue 11-Feb-20 19:31:47

Evening all, and good wishes.

I'm getting really fed up with things going missing here!

A carefully drawn (by an expert) plan for the garden has been missing for years, been through every drawer, cupboard etc to no avail.

Various bits of paperwork are marked awol, just at the moment you need them, but tonight a tub of cocktail sticks/toothpicks have disappeared!

I know I put them upright in the top drawer, because we got fed up with them spreading themselves around in other places (the top and bottom of the container they were in obviously had "issues" and couldn't bear to stay with each other, so they kept parting and scattering their contents)

Some things that go missing are easily understood and accounted for, for example washing up sponges, metal pan scrubbers and rubber gloves will have been taken by Minnie, a cat who was obviously a scullery maid in a former life, and can usually be found scattered around the house "Oh do come in neighbour, kettles on, just ignore the sponge and scourer in the middle of the hall, no, it's not an art installation, nor am I a complete slut, it's the cat"

But as for some other stuff, I'm confused

BlueSapphire Tue 11-Feb-20 21:57:25

I lost an ear-ring in November, kept looking for it, went through my jewellery box multiple times, looked everywhere to no avail and got quite upset as DH had bought them for me.
Decided this morning to give some of my ear-rings a clean, took several pairs out of the jewellery box, lo and behold, there was the lone ear-ring; must have been hidden under another pair. It is now in a safe place and reunited with its twin! I am so relieved.

Doodle Tue 11-Feb-20 22:06:44

I did wonder phonix grin? I thought perhaps Minnie was into aromatherapy!

Charleygirl5 Tue 11-Feb-20 22:23:24

My house appears to make money on the side. Not a lot but when tidying stuff I often find the odd fiver and recently around £200 in euros.

mokryna Tue 11-Feb-20 22:46:39

An irate neighbour wanted me to pay for her Sunday roast, which had been delivered and left on her doorstep by the butcher’s boy because my Siamese cat had tucked into it. I didn’t.

ginny Wed 12-Feb-20 08:32:07

Certainly pens and socks . Swapping handbags last week I found my favourite vegetable knife which had been missing for months.

GrannyGravy13 Wed 12-Feb-20 09:08:12

Our house is extremely mischievous, has been hiding things for the last 33 years, only to reveal them years later in places that they could not have been all that time!!!

Auntieflo Wed 12-Feb-20 09:17:13

I thought every house had a black hole. Ours certainly does.

felice Wed 12-Feb-20 09:49:00

I bought pyjamas for DGS last year, too big so I put the in my T shirt drawer. Bright red with diggers on them, I saw them all year then went to get them on Christmas Eve and they had gone.
Searched everywhere and they are nowhere to be found, questioned DGS and DD but nothing.
They will probably turn up when he is too big for them !!

Callistemon Wed 12-Feb-20 09:52:36

This is why I don't buy Christmas cards, wrapping paper and presents in the January sales!!

jaylucy Wed 12-Feb-20 10:08:06

The Borrowers in my house have a liking for crockery and cutlery, to the point that I no longer have a complete set of anything!
My DS claims it isn't him.

chicken Wed 12-Feb-20 10:08:37

My DDs cat was being courted by a mangy- -looking ginger tom. One day he arrived carrying a pound of bacon rashers wrapped up. in greaseproof paper. They nicknamed him "Tom Sainsbury" after that. They never did find out whose bacon it was.

Outofstepwithhumanity Wed 12-Feb-20 10:13:02

It’s obvious really. Whilst you are asleep, all the inanimate objects get together & conspire. They discuss tactics & decide amongst themselves which of them should re-locate on a temporary basis or disappear permanently. I think it’s called “resistentalism” They sometimes object to being used incorrectly or ignored, so this is their method of revenge.

HappyNan1 Wed 12-Feb-20 10:25:10

Loving all these stories of mischievous cats and borrowers. Thank you all. You’ve made me laugh out loud after a long 12 hour nap got shift on a dementia unit. With lovely residents I hasten to add.

HappyNan1 Wed 12-Feb-20 10:26:02

Sorry, don’t know where the “nap, got” came from ?

polnan Wed 12-Feb-20 10:27:37

I love this thread also.... thank you for the link to Slinky Malinki

just what we need, especially after reading the thread about `orrible things... can`t remember the heading, but yes, there is good stuff out there..

more please!

Scottiebear Wed 12-Feb-20 10:28:36

We lost our upstairs phone. We rarely use it, but we both remembered DH using it a week or so before we noticed it missing. Ringing number did no good as battery probably dead. We both searched high and low, on several occasions over a couple of months, but to no avail. I rarely lose anything so it was driving me mad. One day getting ready to go out I picked something up from my dresser, which was where the phone base sat. But I dropped it. Bent down to pick it up and, you've guessed it, there was the phone staring at me from under the dresser. A place we had both independently searched behind and underneath on several occasions, as it was the most obvious place it could have fallen to. Gremlins?

Rosina Wed 12-Feb-20 10:32:40

There is a greetings card borrower in this house, and a key thief. In spite of strict orders to put car keys and door keys in a basket in the kitchen cupboard, they disappear - oh the hours spent, wasted in hunting. I bought a beautiful card for a dear aunt - couldn't find it a few weeks later when her birthday came; still haven't and she has been dead for five years now. Cards regularly climb out of the card drawer and run away.

Moggycuddler Wed 12-Feb-20 10:38:51

Whenever they can't find something in our house, DH and DD accuse me of throwing it away. It does my head in!! The items usually turn up in some weird place where THEY have put them and forgotten.

Emptynester Wed 12-Feb-20 10:41:53

Alishka one of our cats brought home a cold leg of lamb one Monday lunchtime. It had had a small amount carved off whilst hot (probably on Sunday) and I decided not to canvas the neighbourhood for the owners, though I did hear a bit of a row from next doors!

Phloembundle Wed 12-Feb-20 11:00:16

If I lose anything I call on St. Anthony. Works every time.

lindiann Wed 12-Feb-20 11:00:48

I couldn't find my rolling pin where did it turn up in the fridge ??? confused

annodomini Wed 12-Feb-20 11:01:45

My house eats and later throws up passports. One year, it was nowhere to be found. I searched frantically but gave up, two days before I was due to go to Paris with my sister. Off I went and threw myself on the mercy of very kind officers in the Passport Office. What did I find when I opened a drawer. You've guessed it. Lately, I had a fruitless search for my current passport though fortunately I don't need it right now. It has turned up in the very bureau I had turned upside down in my search,

Menopauselbitch Wed 12-Feb-20 11:04:02

Callistemon
What a lovely thought. I can see that fence in my imagination x

nipsmum Wed 12-Feb-20 11:09:16

I don't know why they would need my original birth certificate. Maybe for wallpaper, but I had to get a copy from the powers that be. It cost money too. !!!

nanamac77 Wed 12-Feb-20 11:16:33

First rule for lost things.
Look in the same place at least 5 times.
Even though I would swear I had thoroughly ransacked a possible hiding place, I quite often find something in a place which I thought I had searched thoroughly at least three or four times!
Yesterday it was my little case of bank cards, loyalty cards, membership cards etc.........
(Memo to myself - must make a list of the cards - the thought of trying to remember them all and having to replace them was VERY daunting!)