Robbie Williams and surrogacy

Bibbity, I am not burying my head in the sand.

I’m telling you that this attitude is quite “othering”. Most people don’t like to be defined by the trauma they’ve experienced.

As an adopted person, I’m finding this all pretty demeaning.

Good heavens! What a dreadful thread this has turned into regarding adoption.

I will leave it and leave Gransnet altogether. What an uncaring place this is.

So many experts here, telling adopted people how they felt as
children, how they feel now.

The evidence based best practice in adoption services is there so that people arent defined by early attatchment trauma.

In order to do that and put in the appropriate support, it first has to be acknowledged that it exists. Which it widely is in countries that have more ethical "best practice" adoption services

So many experts here, telling adopted people how they felt as
children, how they feel now

Nobody has done that
And attatchment trauma isnt a "feeling" its a physiological response. Its biology.

I'm out off this thread.

Babies do have a phsiological response to separation from their birth mother. Regardless of whether they are a good mother or not. Regardless of how happy their adoptive life is. Its a biological response that affects and changes the body.

As said upthread, we accept that it reduces health and wellbeing outcomes for other mammals to be separated from their birth mother soon after birth. Humans are mammals too.

I agree summerlove Let's hear it for all those of us who had happy non traumatised lives as adopted children.

Don't leave lavenderzen we need posters who care .

Summer. Stop taking science so personally.
You can’t argue with what’s been proven.

Take it up with the facts.

lavenderzen please don’t leave

When people say they are going to leave GN, I have an overwhelming urge to say ‘Don’t forget to close the door on your way out’.

Just comeback to this thread and my goodness what a racket. GN telling others, who have the experience of being adopted how it they should be feeling. Why not just listen to those who have been adopted.

Back to the thread of RW may feelings are still the same, its a disgrace that people can just buy their way through childbirth and get someone else to do all the hard work, along with the risks for them.

The surprise suzie is you are able to control that urge

I’m not telling anyone how to feel. But you know. Don’t let science and facts get in the way of being offended.

No one knows how the children of surrogacy are going to feel when they are older and know how they were conceived. I know of two families that adopted two children each, in both families one if those children sought out their birth mother and reunited. So one of each family accepted and one didn't.

The definition of trauma is widening to include some behaviours and situations we previously regarded as bad luck.

They are doing the same as Elton John and numerous other celebs the difference in this case is the baby is biologically theirs.

And I can relate from experience just how damaging contact with the birth family can be for adopted children. In the case of my grandchild, contact with the birth family caused huge behavioural problems, and huge upset with our grandchild who was asking for reassurance from the adoptive family, that he would always live with them. This caused my son and his partner to stop all visits to the birth family, simply due to the degree of distress that was being experienced by their child. The school reported similar behaviour to them aswell, so it certainly wasn’t their imagination. Our grandchild has no memory of his birth family and being expected to meet up with them caused huge and damaging distress, even though the adoptive parents did everything they could to prepare him. Do not assume that you know what is best for every adopted child, the parents are the best people to judge what is best for their child.

Science or not, the words being used are quite demeaning.

It’s not about choosing to be offended, but about my actual experiences.

In the zeal to protect Figurative babies, people are forgetting that there are Actual adopted people here. Who are reading about how you and science think we are traumatised and damaged.

Science might say it, but the words being used here, and the demeaning of people’s feelings is deeply unkind for people who are acting as advocates so others aren’t hurt

So why arent we allowed to sell newborn puppies/foals then?

A newborn puppy suckles, can anyone buy a week old puppy
and let the puppy continue to suckle ?

Animal formula is available. Its not just because of that.. ask any vet or breeder

If an animal mother neglects her offspring notanan2 the offspring will be given to another animal or hand reared-adopted then!!!

When we were young he used to take loads of drugs and fetch girls to queue outside his room so he could shag them one by one