I have become invisible

I still work (now part time yah!) and most of my colleagues never make me feel that way. They are mostly much younger, though I suspect one or two of the much younger ones are slightly in Awe. I’m 64.

When I go out and about though I do feel very invisible
I hope to continue working for as long as possible, but who knows, it has given me confidence and the feeling I still have things to offer

i think i write in invisible type
glad it's not only me *BBbevan and whywhywhy

BBbevan me too! I feel invisible sometimes too. I find young people interesting and they don't expect me to speak to them but they are fine once they've got over the shock! I'm 66 but have been growing my hair for a year and it's below my shoulders now, thick and wavy and lightly coloured. To my amusement I've seen a few men slide by and peer sideways at me and then hurry on once they realise I'm no longer a spring chicken! Young mums and middle aged men are the ones who could clearly mow me down and never notice!!

I think I must be invisible whenever I open a door for someone to pass through I never get thanked!

I know exactly what you mean, Sparkling. After years of holding down a responsible and senior job it is hard to become someone of little interest and I think old women are more likely to become invisible than are old men for some reason. And the person above who wrote that teenagers think old biddies who try and talk to them are mad is quite correct.

It's often quite hard not to feel invisible when out and about. It often seems - especially in the south of England - that there is no time for anything now , not even a greeting and a smile. Not important any more. So, after many years of living abroad (where older people do count!) I am tempted to behave a little disgracefully now and then. In England I respond and greet people and make eye contact, I never "grunt" and I always smile. It never worries me that a lot of stressed people might think "nutter". Some day we will all be old and if a very old person speaks to me I NEVER walk past and ignore them : what if mine is the only conversation that person has during the whole day? I will speak to the older cashiers in Tesco who question as to why I am buying so many boxes of Earl Grey Tea and then how do I like living in the sunshine. I don't care if her chatting to me holds up the queue - every single person needs human contact sometimes, we are not robots! Probably heading towards the 'purple coat and red hat' age now, so I don't care, but I welcome a conversation with anyone however young, however old, however short of time I am. We all deserve that. No little child will get a sour-faced response from me when they ask my name or my age and embarrass their Mum. I'm happy to entertain small kids in the Building Society queue whilst their Mothers play with their 'phones....oblivious. Invisibles can strike back! We all need to slow down and start caring and not make anyone feel invisible, ever. Do one small kind thing every day and see how are lives are enriched by that.

Not noticed it. I am 76.

The only time I feel invisible is when people constantly walk into me in a shop or anywhere really. Otherwise I feel visible enough, sometimes I prefer not to be visible .

And me

Maybe it depends on what you wear. I feel unattractive and invisible when I wear my dog-walking coat and cords (have succumbed recently due to the awful weather), but when I wear something smart and bright - and I always wear make-up - I feel much happier and less of a nonentity.

I was delighted when my friend said I'm a child magnet. I always smile when I see small children with their parents and usually they will smile back and often tell me what they are doing or where they are going.
I live in a holiday area so people out and about are generally quite happy and like chatting to the "locals" so I don't feel invisible,I just feel like me and am more confident now than I've ever been.

I've always liked being in the background and do not like being noticed. So being ignored suits me in everyday living when I am busy and need time for myself. But I am friendly and will talk to anyone who talks to me.

I always make eye contact and smile at people in the street, bus stop, surgery etc, and respond when someone does the same to me. I know it can make someone's day and maybe they are lonely or worried...and feeling invisible. I've gone on to have marvellous conversations with some very interesting people on a bus journey for example...just by commenting on the weather.

The friendliest encounters come from those on cycle/walking paths, parks or promenades [live in tourist area] and are walking for leisure. Dog walkers can be very friendly, especially if you notice and are interested in their dogs.

I think we can get out what we put in, so it doesn't hurt to try and acknowledge others, and they can then do the same for us. It makes us feel valid.

I used to dread walking past a group of workmen because I knew they'd be looking at me. Now I can walk past a dozen of them and wouldn't even get a glance. I colour my hair, wear make-up, modern clothes... but all to no avail. Not that I'm seeking the attention of young men but nobody at all seems to notice me any more.

That invsibility could be a good thing.

I remember hearing a radio interview with an old lady who lived in a very dodgy part of London.

She said that if she was walking along her road at night and saw a gang of aggressive looking teenage lads on the opposite side of the road she would cross over and ask them some innocuous question such as "what's the time?" or ""can you give me directions to ,...?"

They were always helpful and polite, possibly because she was vulnerable, yet unafraid.which is a good example to us all.

Yes I find I am expected to give way on pavements except when walking the Jack Russell. Little friendly dog but people move away as if is it were a Rottweiler!

I think you have to make more of an effort as you get older; I'd find it all too easy to not speak when I'm out and about because I'm not a naturally sociable person. I still work part time and all of my colleagues are a couple of generations at least younger than me and, surprisingly, they still seem to want to chat with me beyond work matters and that helps.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I've been feeling the same way lately. What did you end up doing to help?

I knew a woman in her seventies who said the same thing. She started dying her hair pink, then blue, so people would notice her more. I guess it worked for her!

I’m 72, still working part-time, go to the gym, I certainly don’t feel invisible 😁

I love being invisible.

I'm 70 and have been invisible for yonks and I quite like it - nobody gives a hoot about old Biddy Women so I'm under no fictitious obligation to give a toss about anyone else.

Terriffic!

haha, that comment made me laugh

There are times when I feel I have an invisibility cloak on such as when sitting in a restaurant on my own I seem to be ignored by the waiting staff and in shops when the assistants carry on talking when I am waiting to be served!! Otherwise I am happy to fade into the background😂

Sparkling sorry you feel this way. Only time I felt invisible was when I was 29 and because of my health got worse and the children where 4 and 6 months I went in a wheelchair as my walking was so bad . Plus my husband would never leave me at home . He said we will adapt to what you can do and be a normal family and he kept his promise until he died .

Until I was in the wheelchair I didn't realise you become invisible and people would ask my husband what I wanted he went mad and said ask her she can talk. Plus my husband had wheelchair rage anyone cut in front of us he went for them . Did tell him I didn't need anyone else on my lap as I had our son and sometimes our daughter as well. He always hit them .

Once the children got older and my walking got bit better . I vowed I would never be invisible again . Plus I realised how dangerous it was for people in wheelchairs and children in pushchairs as people in those days could smoke in shops and malls. Nearly got burnt 3 times.

I am 66 now and never feel invisible . And go out on my own as been widowed for 21 years. To much of a chatterbox to be invisible .

All you have to do is wish people good morning etc you never have to be invisible. But you do have to make the effort and the world opens up to you .