Children or best friends

I think of my AD as my best friend. We are very close and talk about everything (except our sex lives!)

You can say anything to a really good friend, not to my daughter

Really, justanotherwannabe? I’m just as careful what I say to my friends as I am to my family. Why would you want to risk hurting someone’s feelings by just saying anything, without thinking about the impact your words might have on them?

Friends can come and go. As a parent you have/had a responsibility to nurture and maintain your child. Reaching adulthood you have done your job though at times it seems it never ends! No, not a friend but still have a listening ear and a few guiding words when needed.

I would never choose my children as my friends .... they are so different from me! My friends are my choice....
my children I would literally die for.... ( well at least give them a kidney) ..... they choose they’re own friends, all I ask is respect .. and I think they love me . Good enough.

Although I would say that I am lose to my son, I don't really class him as a friend and he certainly doesn't class me as his friend!
My SiL and her daughter are friends- they used to work together as well as go out socially, but not so much since my niece has had children and my SiL has had to stop working due to her OH's ill health.
It's a bit like history repeating itself - my SiL seemed to do just about everything with her own mother, including work together which worked well for them, until there was a big fall out over something trivial- my MiL didn't speak to SiL for several years and didn't even want her own daughter to be told when she died!

Same here Septimia.

Im not on facebook though,or the snapchat or anything,so they have their 'real' friends on all that,but they know im there as a parent,friend,advisor,etc whenever they want- i went to a hotel/ spa last wk with one of my AC,my middle daughter (with GC though too) but we enjoyed it so much we're going to another on our own nxt mth.& i often invite my youngest daughter( 27) on holidays.so yes we are friends too

Quite a few Gransnetters have said they don't discuss sex with their adult children - well I don't discuss my sex life - but sometimes things about their sex lives have come up and I am happy to discuss and advise if I can. One of my daughters had to have a repair 10 months after the birth of her child and we discussed that in full - whether she would have the op, how it would make things better for her sex life, and afterwards how she felt. I even saw the repair job which was amazingly well done. As others have said, I am always their mum - but we are friends and do things together, but I don't burden them with my worries.

Children and friends are quite different and should be treated as such.

No, my adult children are not my friends. The bond is even deeper than friendship but of a different and visceral sort.
My friends are not the same as my family but I love them all.

I have 2 sons and one daughter, was a single parent mostly, and when young they were all taught respect and boundaries. They have always been able to talk to me about anything at any age, it’s what I’ve encouraged, even tho it has been a little uncomfortable at times, that’s what parenting is to me .... I still feel it’s very special that they are able to turn to me with absolutely anything even now that all 3 are in their 40’s.

No....

Must say I have a close relatio ship withmost of my children and love them dearly we are not friends!
My daughters partners 5 year old tell his dad hes his best friend and the dad tell the child he is his best friend, I don't agree with this as he is his father.

No. We are polar opposites in our views, and get into heated arguments when I want a peaceful life.

Children can be your friend . As long as there are boundaries and they know right from wrong . They know that you are there parents and there are rules that need to be obeyed . Wouldn't you want your child to come to you if they have a problem or needed advice . I always told my children tell the truth and I can always help you . Lie and your on your own . My youngest daughter is now 25 , we go on holiday together and we class ourselves as best friends . I have to say I trust her more than any friend .

No ,I get on really well with my son and daughters all adults, we chat we laugh etc. But there are some things I don't want to discuss with them, which I wool 6 discus with my friends. And visa versa with my children, I'm sure there's things they don't want to talk to me about,

My children have many friends ... but only one mother!

What a very interesting and intriguing question. I had to ponder and the answer is a definite no. There are some no go areas for my children and same but different for my friends. Hadn't ever really thought about this until today. Rather thought provoking. Thanks, opener.

Yes. In that, despite the fact that I am in charge and make the rules as an adult, I listen to them, respect them and talk to them with the same love and respect I would give to another adult. They have always been my friends and I think this led to them being able to talk to me about anything, and to maintain a positive relationship through the trickier teens.

I love my AC dearly (and we can talk about most things) but the parent/child relationship is always there. The relationship I have with my friends is definitely different, and for me, that's as it should be. (I do appreciate that it may be different for other people.)

My daughter is 50 and my son is 45. We all do things together. I regard them as my children but I reckon we are all good friends, so the answer is, 'Yes, I do treat them as friends'.

We have a close bond, but all different with my 3 children. They are my children not my Friends that is a different relationship, surely your children do not want to know about Mum n Dads personal life and sometimes some things are best kept.
We have raised these people we must not burden them and make them feel uncomfortable around us.
My Children enjoy our company as it is ......attached by the umbilical cord lol xx

Aep "^Children and friends are quite different and should be treated as such.^"

Opinion surely? Not appropriate for a dogmatic general statement like this.

Young children - no, not really, although encouraging communication could be considered 'friendly'.

AC? I don't see why not. I can talk about anything with mine. We will socialise, drink and share jokes etc. The same as I do with my friends, so yes - I think we are friends.

I socialise with my adult children too, and ask their advice sometimes. We can have a really good laugh together.
I would not burden them with any emotional problems of my own though.