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If I'd known then what I know now ...

(75 Posts)
b1zzle Thu 27-Feb-20 12:53:03

… I'd have taken more care of my teeth, never have started smoking, never sat in the sun...

TwiceAsNice Fri 28-Feb-20 14:40:49

Wished I had not married my exhusband and that I had left him much sooner than I did- so much happier now I’m on my own

Smaller things
Wished I had learnt to swim and got to learn to speak a language fluently

Biggest thing of all I wish my small son could have survived the cancer he was diagnosed with and he hadn’t had to suffer- and us also as a family

Saggi Fri 28-Feb-20 14:53:31

I would’ve thought more about my life and my future and less about what my husband THOUGHT was good for me!! In fact I wouldn’t have married.

sarahellenwhitney Fri 28-Feb-20 15:05:16

I wish I HAD stood up to the bullying. keeping to myself what I endured not only in school but my early days at work. Looking back on my life I have since questioned did this passive endurance of some pretty nasty moments that gave others such pleasure make me the person I am, and have achieved since those days.?

Tooyoungytobeagrandma Fri 28-Feb-20 15:11:21

I would not have married the man I did. I did have misgivings abot a week before but was concinced by my mother it was the wedding jitters. Now nearly forty years on going through a divorce where he is showing his true colours and reconfirming what I've known but ignored for most of our married life. Also would have paid inro a private pension so that I could be retired d and swanning off here there everywhere like stbxh

gagsy Fri 28-Feb-20 16:36:10

Not accepted that proposal and gone for the job I’d dreamt of

blueskies Fri 28-Feb-20 16:41:11

I would have had--- no! too naughty to put here.

Maggiemaybe Fri 28-Feb-20 16:53:43

I’m not one for “what ifs” and I’ve been very lucky with my choices. But this thread has got me thinking. We worked abroad and were then both offered jobs at two branches of the company. We chose to come back to where we still live, a good place but about as far as you can get in England from the sea, or a coastal town in Scotland. If we’d chosen Scotland I wouldn’t now still be hankering after the sea I grew up next to. And I’d have had my bus pass for 5 years!

jenni123 Fri 28-Feb-20 16:59:34

Billy Bob. Tell him now, he will hear you

Galaxy Fri 28-Feb-20 17:18:59

This is a really interesting thread. I hope young women read it.

Sweetpea60 Fri 28-Feb-20 17:30:33

I would of stayed single ,learnt to drive and spent more time with my wonderful father who was a very gentle quiet man who i miss every day .

grandmac Fri 28-Feb-20 17:57:39

Yes, family memories! I was supposed to be the family historian and asked my parents about their parents, but didn’t ask about their own young lives. How I regret that now.
Luckily I don’t regret much else, had a very happy marriage and 3 great kids.

Guineagirl Fri 28-Feb-20 18:07:25

Lots of what ifs here too. I look after my teeth now lol. Same as Flyingsolo I didn’t want a regret with my Mam when she was dying so I made sure I cared for her and looked after her and was with her when she died, one thing I don’t regret and glad I was there for her if I hadn’t been there I’d have really regretted it. X

ClareAB Fri 28-Feb-20 18:19:41

I'm with Helen Mirren. I would have told a lot more people to F* off!

Happygirl79 Fri 28-Feb-20 18:48:44

I wish I had learned to say no much earlier in life than I did

Esther1 Fri 28-Feb-20 19:05:51

I wish I’d had a career - it seemed when I left school that choices were Teacher (I couldn’t face the thought of being back in school) or Nurse (I was told I had to have a science 0 level) Air Hostess (I was told I had to speak a second language) Hairdresser (mother deemed it not good enough - ridiculous I know!!) Office Work (which is what I went for and gave up as soon as I married) how times have changed!

Glinda Fri 28-Feb-20 19:08:42

Hi all. Looking for advice. I'm 52 and in 2 wks time I am having open surgery on an aortic aneurysm that was discovered by chance during a scan to diagnose appendicitis in 2018. I am very worried and wondered if anyone on here has or knows anyone that has had the same operation. I also have rare Cushings syndrome. Can anyone put my mind at rest?

Marydoll Fri 28-Feb-20 20:33:53

Hi Glinda, I'm sorry to hear you are so unwell.

It would be best to start a thread of your own, under Health, which is more specific, so that more people will see it.
Forums - Health - Start a new discussion.

Good luck! flowers

4allweknow Fri 28-Feb-20 21:50:20

I wouldn't have had children. Even with them now being mature adults I not only worry about them but their families. Also just how much cost is involved in raising children was never considered and it should have been.

Chardy Sat 29-Feb-20 07:11:06

I started family history when pregnant with No 1 child. Then I had 2 relatives from 2 generations back - one grandparent on Dad's side and a sibling of another grandparent on Mum's. They were old (82 and 94) but alert but brilliant.

However why didn't I start sooner when other grandparents were still there to ask? The time to start is always years before you did!

gillyjp Sat 29-Feb-20 07:24:46

I wish I'd known that my mother had worked at Bletchley Park. I would have asked her about her work there. She died in 1974 at the age of 51 and because she'd signed the official secrets act at the time of employment, we never knew until many years later when my father told us. DH and I are making a trip there this year to see if we can find out more about it all. Mum must have been very young when she worked there during the war.

Billybob4491 Sat 29-Feb-20 08:33:41

Thank you Jenn if only we could turn back the time.

Annana Sat 29-Feb-20 08:47:19

You’re absolutely right Polnan that there’s no point in regrets but we learn from them and just perhaps we might still have time to act upon some of those wise nuggets.
Certainly, in my next life -as long as I don‘t come back as a frog or something, I will be more careful when choosing a partner and career!

harrysgran Sat 29-Feb-20 11:41:55

Paid into a private pension so I wouldn't have to keep working until 66 years old fortunately I'm in a job I love but I would still have liked to retire when I chose rather than when I can afford to

Chewbacca Sat 29-Feb-20 12:01:05

1. I'd have worked in a job that gave me the opportunity to pay into a private pension when I was younger
2. That I'd listened to my Dad and never started smoking
3. That I had never even looked at this house, let alone be daft enough to buy it.