My sister Margot, the labrador and the cake.

Yet another labrador story.

20 years ago we adopted a labrador to keep our other, female lab company. The new addition was a male, from the Queens Sandringham kennels. He was a very pretty boy, but DIM!

Our cats, initially were terrified of the great, galumphing dog. He was SUCH a contrast to our well behaved, dainty female lab. The female dog loved our cats and mothered them, when we got them as kittens. The male, was also fascinated with the little kitten we had when we adopted him, but not in such a good way. We were very careful not to leave the new big boy alone with the kitten, but once, forgetting, I left the french doors open and the kitten wandered out into the garden with the dogs.

When I got outside, the kitten who was still tiny, was nowhere to be seen. The big boy lab was looking very suspicious and when I went over to him, found he had the kitten IN his mouth! I'll never know if he was carrying it or trying to eat it.

Kitten was fine though, and grew up to be a greedy monster too. Was the ONLY cat that would go near the big slobbery male lab when he was eating. That cat would put its head INTO the bowl the lab was eating from and share the food. He'd come out covered with dog drool and have to be cleaned up by the female dog.

We had a golden retriever with only one restriction. There was a white sofa in one room so DH insisted she could not enter due to shedding. She seemed very compliant. One day I removed all the cushions to Hoover and found her hidden treasure trove of kibble! She just asserted she could enter the room without our permission!

We had a beautiful but greedy Doberman bitch, who would have stolen the fillings from your teeth if she'd thought they were edible, and pilfering food was just part of the delight of living with her. On one occasion we were away in our caravan, thought she was safely contained in the caravan, and we went off to get water. On returning , we saw her sneaking out of someone else's awning, smacking her chops having clearly pinched and eaten something from someone else's awning. I've no idea how she got out, but we got her and ourselves back into our van before we were spotted.
We did try to deter her from her thievery by deliberately leaving dog choccy buttons on the kitchen worktop, liberally coated with mustard, hoping it would be so unpleasant she'd desist in future. Clearly a futile exercise, as all she did was scoff the mustard coated chocolate, then washed it all down with water to cool her mouth down.
On her hind legs, she stood eye to eye with me , and would often stand up alongside me when I was making meals, her front paws on the worktop , the whole process was punctuated with me smacking (not hard) her front paws to get her down from the worktop, always followed by her bouncing promptly back up. A true character, long gone but still loved and reminisced about.

Our lab used to pinch the veg from our veggie box so I put it on the kitchen counter. Unfortunately it was quite close to the gas cooker, and when she jumped up to try and get at the veg, she managed to turn on the gas tap which set the veggie box on fire. We were all in bed at the time, but luckily our next door neighbours saw the blaze from their bedroom window and managed to wake us up, so the disaster was averted

Love the thread title fatgran
You should use it for your memoirs

My grandson was living with me gir a while and we rescued a stray lurcher cross. He'd made and apple pie and we left it cooling on the kitchen worktop. A bit later on he went onto the kitchen and found the dish completely empty. He was sure it was me hiding it. It wasn't until our lurcher brought up the whole apple pie that we realised it was the dog. Nothing was safe. Tiger loaf, half a joint of beef also half a cooked chicken. We were lucky he didn't kill himself with that. He was quite I'll. We learned our lesson.

Time for a cat story.

When I was a child we had an old black cat called Randy ( nothing to do with his sexual prowess, he was born the day Randolf Turpin won a big boxing match).

One day, there was a terrible commotion in our back garden: Randy was rushing up the path hotly persued by one of our neighbours, pussy having popped into their house and taken their budgie in flight.

The cat , with Joey firmly clamped in his mouth, took refuge in the outside lavatory and tried to hide behind the pan. Neighbour folloed him in and though Randy fought valiantly to hang onto his prize, she managed -not unscathed- to wrest the bird from his mouth.

The poor traumatised bird was carried home and I wish I could say that it all ended well, but unfortunately the owner decided to revive Joey by giving him a few drops of brandy, after which he dropped dead.

My terrier often buries food, presumably to soften it up before eating it, regrettably that includes the odd rabbit or a bird - not a nice dog at all.

oldgoat not a happy ending then. Poor Joey he "Taut he taw a puddy tat" right enough!

I’m reminded of the time a very foodie BiL brought some soft cheese from France. It was so over-ripe it honestly smelled like one of those dirty nappies that have been festering for hours before you come to change it in the morning.

BiL of course pronounced it delicious, but TBH he’s the sort of person who’d pronounce absolutely anything delicious if someone told him it was a delicacy of the Dordogne.

We later offered the stinking remains to our normally dustbin dog, but even she turned her nose up!

Said dog (RIP) was always burying something in weird places, which is why I once had a loud call from a dd upstairs: ‘Mum!! Will you please tell your dog not to bury her bones in my bed?’

Reminds me when got into bed years ago, still married then, husband said you smell nice, got comfy, pillow not right, underneath was roast leg of lamb bone left in a safe place by our 57 variety dog?

We used to spend our summer holiday at my Granny's house in Fife. As soon as we arrived, she would produce a juicy bone for out boxer who would take it out and enjoy it in the enormous garden where it would eventually disappear. We had no idea where she had buried all those bones until we noticed a revolting stench in the summerhouse and found that she had undermined the building to create a hiding place for her treasures.

Nannylovesshopping ?

Our lovely no longer with us black lab us had a penchant for big fat cruchy slimy snails?... she caught lung worm.
This didnt deter her,she also ate a drawing pin that didnt deter her.
She loved all the animals we had,and there where lots.
Poor Ellie was a bit of wonky donkey,and in one of the many cancers she had ,meant that half her jaw was removed,which meant her tongue was left hanging outside of her mouth at times.
One of our chickens wandered in and took a swipe thinking no doubt juicy pink ham and attempted to pull on this,until even the mild mannered Ellie decided to snap....xhicky just sauntered off to munch on Ellies dinner instead.

Fergus (my ginger cat) was an inveterate thief. We lived across from a primary school, and F. often came home with crayons, small toys, lego etc., One day he carried a lunch bag with a cheese sandwich and some fruit. He ate part of the sandwich and took a bite out of the apple. Another day he stole a frozen lamb dinner from the local Co-op which he dragged up the street, and opened up in the front garden to try. Socks and knickers were also fair game to be displayed.

My 40 and 35 year old daughters recently admitted that when they were young she used to get the squirty cream out of the fridge before we were up and about. Apparently our cat used to stand with her mouth open and they squirted cream straight into her mouth before they both helped themselves to a squirt! Good grief!

We were at a wedding recently. The wedding cake was cut and some served for dessert. The next day at the venue it was discovered the neighbours dog had eaten the other tiers.

Evie64