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A lockdown cheese sandwich!

(59 Posts)
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Artdecogran Wed 15-Apr-20 09:51:09

In order to make a cheese sandwich I have to:
1) put on gloves to pick up loaf of bread, open bag.
2) take off gloves, take out 2 slices without touching outside of bag.
3) put on gloves, seal up bag.
4) take off gloves, lift up lid of bread bin.
5) put on gloves, put bread in bread bin.
6) take off gloves, put lid back on bread bin.
7) put on gloves, take butter out of fridge, take lid off butter.
8) take off gloves, get knife scrape off some butter, tub slides all over the place, put on glove to hold tub. Take off glove, put butter on bread.
9) put on gloves. take cheese out of fridge and open packet. Shake packet till cheese slides out and lands on floor. Get new packet of cheese, shake out onto plate.
10) take off gloves, slice cheese, put on bread. Cut sandwich.
11) put on glove, hold cheese packet with gloved hand, slide in cheese with other.
12) put on other glove, fold over cheese wrapping.
13) take off gloves, open fridge door.
14) put on gloves, pick up cheese and butter, put in fridge.
15) take off gloves, shut fridge door.
Turn around and knock plate on to floor where it shatters in to pieces, just like my mind!

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sodapop Thu 16-Apr-20 12:43:20

Sounds like a plan to me GrandmaFrench shall I bring my husband to help with the catering ?

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Jane43 Thu 16-Apr-20 12:53:34

Ah yes, the good old days when we had no fridge and certainly no freezer or dishwasher. We used to have to spoon the lumps off milk in the warm weather, scrape the mould off jam and cheese and the Sunday joint was used up on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. One of my Dad’s favourite sayings was, “You’ll eat mor dirt than that before you die.”

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Maggiemaybe Thu 16-Apr-20 12:57:06

Oh, I’ll put it in the diary! There seems to be rather a lot of blank space in there at the moment, for some reason! grin

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Grandmafrench Thu 16-Apr-20 13:59:36

Lovely, sodapop - he might want to take advantage of one of Callis dicky bibs in order to bring a welcome touch of class to the gathering and I'm sure she'll be taking orders after this nightmare period in our lives is over. Jane43 you sound as if you could be better employed working on a vaccine.....with all that experience!!!!!!! grin
I look in my diary, MM and it confirms my title of Billy No Mates. Have a super afternoon all, you've given me and my DH a great laugh. x

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Bathsheba Thu 16-Apr-20 14:25:30

Haha, I'm late to this thread and was laughing my socks off picturing the sandwich making rigmarole!

It reminded me a bit of this comical video that I saw posted somewhere a couple of weeks ago.

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Alishka Thu 16-Apr-20 14:27:51

artdecgran no huddling in a corner for you! By Decree, you're going to be moved into a Round Housegrin

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Callistemon Thu 16-Apr-20 14:40:51

Hurrah! I'm Nanny, must nip off to Norland for a crash course and a nice brown uniform and hat

grin

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Barmeyoldbat Thu 16-Apr-20 15:39:56

Good for the diet though.

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