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I just discovered I like tormenting my neighbour

(108 Posts)
vampirequeen Mon 27-Apr-20 11:09:01

Well not really tormenting but.....well I'll explain.

I have a rather odd neighbour. She bought her flat and is now trying to sell it. It's been on the market for a long time (well before lockdown) and no one is interested.

Now it could be explained by the price. For the same or even less money you could buy something bigger, freehold and with off street parking.

But she seems to blame us. She chose to buy a leasehold council flat years before we moved here. We're council tenants and she seems to think that having council tenants next door is putting people off. We're very well behaved....not the DM chavy version. I'm a bit dim when it comes to people being nasty. I tend to either miss it or excuse it. I was a bit surprised when she stopped talking to us just after the council put our new bathroom in but at first I just thought she was busy, not well, distracted by something in her life. But it's become a bit daft now. Recently she shouted at me for putting a pot of tulips near 'her' tree (communal garden). I don't like upsetting people and it is a shared area so I moved the pot. I should add that when we moved there was a weedy, messy area that a previous tenant had, at some point, tried to plant up so I just tidied it up and added a few bits and bobs. Nobody complained because most people like to see a few flowers and anyway it was better than the mess it was. Later she complained/shouted at me because I put the tulips near the birdbath so I put them elsewhere.

I finally cracked the other day and accepted that she was indeed trying to ignore me when she wasn't shouting at me. So I decided to wind her up. I know I shouldn't be I can't stop myself. I decided the best way to wind her up was to pretend that I didn't know I was being ignored. You see she makes it rather obvious by looking away and even crossing the road. So now when I see her I say 'Hi *. Y'all right?'. This puts her in an awkward position. Does she carry on ignoring me now that I've greeted day or does her Englishness force her to be polite and reply? Oh the pain on her face when she says 'Hello' in reply. grin

Jishere Tue 28-Apr-20 10:25:16

This does seem so petty in the scheme of things. She may have loads going on in her life, that you don't know about. She may be suffering from a mental illness and just trying to get through as best she can. But rest assured eventually your have new neighbours.

Why waste energy on someone you don't really know

jenni123 Tue 28-Apr-20 10:21:08

I live in a rented sheltered housing flat, owned by a HA, right opposite is another block also owned by the HA, it is so close to us that you can just get an ambulance or dust cart down between the buildings. The other block are leasehold and several residents from there will not talk to us, one man even told others in his building not to talk to us as we are 'council scum'. We are all elderly and well behaved......

Jess20 Tue 28-Apr-20 10:15:37

Yes, I think behaving with good manners and saying hello etc, acting as if nothing is wrong and the person behaving like a tosser is your dearest friend, can be the biggest wind-up ever. It forces them to behave in very strange ways, especially satisfying if its in front of other people. When I was yound I was all into being 'honest and genuine', these days I realise that isn't always the best way to carry on in a difficult situation, and have much more fun.

Hetty58 Tue 28-Apr-20 10:14:01

I've had big trouble with a neighbour. They've built on my land, swamped my garden with their pressure washer, shouted at my guests for parking across my drive, etc. etc. in fact, a long list of incidents.

I am hopping mad with them really - but never, ever let it show. I'm surface-friendly, outwardly concerned, always happy - it's the very best revenge!

Cambia Tue 28-Apr-20 10:12:49

Nothing is more fun than being extremely nice and smiley to people that disapprove of you! I read somewhere that the best revenge is to look as though you are having fun and loving life! It drives them mad!

Soozikinzi Tue 28-Apr-20 10:10:33

My husband followed this tactic with a an ex neighbour of ours who no one else in the cul devsac spoke to . He made sure he got right in his eyeline and the said hello loudly. It is the best way with these types it really confuses them !

T56ers Tue 28-Apr-20 10:10:08

That's given me a giggle this morning. By the way, when she eventually sells up and moves will she be taking "her" tree with her?

kangaroo73 Tue 28-Apr-20 10:09:57

You’re a woman after my own heart ! Inverted snobbery for no reason whatsoever on her part. She’s a sad person and you’re lovely vampire queen ?

sazz1 Tue 28-Apr-20 10:07:45

We bought an ex council house here and have lovely neighbours. Came with a card, wine and chocolates when we moved in. Don't know if it's council house or bought but don't really care. Second excouncil house we've bought over the years. Our last house was private and had lovely neighbours one side and a miserable old lady the other. She complained about our dog barking, said she was going to make an official complaint then saw our dog was sat quietly next to me.and it was the dog 2 doors up. I told her go and complain to them. Rough family whose dog it was, bet she didnt say anything to them.

Paperbackwriter Tue 28-Apr-20 10:06:23

Well you know what they say, "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer"!

polnan Tue 28-Apr-20 10:06:23

Love it! love you vampirequeen.. that`s the way to do it!

Keep us up to date please, I love your story

25Avalon Tue 28-Apr-20 10:05:45

I don’t think I could be faffed to take any notice of the neighbour who seems a bit of a daft cow. Just leave her to her misery. If it makes you personally feel better however then it’s up to you but I wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of knowing she had got to me. But that’s me. Why are you moving your tulips around anyway?Put them where you want them.

Esmerelda Tue 28-Apr-20 10:05:32

Thumbs up vampirequeen ... that's the way to do it. She may even become a nicer person because it's hard to be sour when confronted with someone being pleasant.

MarieEliza Tue 28-Apr-20 10:04:19

I remember reading about a man in New York who went to the same grumpy newspaper vendor each morning on his street and he always returned his grumpiness with a beaming smile and a positive word. When asked why he did this he replied that he wasn’t going to let someone else decide what day he was going to have ?

sarahellenwhitney Tue 28-Apr-20 10:03:48

VAMPIREQUEEN
It was HER choice to buy a council leasehold flat.No doubt her asking price is more than what potential buyers are prepared to pay. No worries bide your time as you will I am sure have the last laugh /grinonce she sees the light and forced to reduce her price.

polnan Tue 28-Apr-20 10:03:05

Sorry VampireQueen, I just come here, got my first coffee of the day,, and started to read your post.

only read the first couple of sentences,, your neighbour thinks YOU lower the tone, price,, as you are council tenants

oh my! I nearly, not quite spilt my coffee with sniggering

does that attitude really still exist.. oh my! oh my! you have really made my day... I woke feeling a bit down, to be honest..
and now I am smiling all over and giggling inside

now I have to go back and read the rest of your post, and hope you are , indeed, tormenting her!grin

Leah50 Tue 28-Apr-20 10:01:04

Oh, I loved this post! Our neighbour objected to my daughters fiance parking his perfectly nice car outside in our shared layby, (we don't have a car). I took great pleasure in telling her we were putting our house up for sale due to the bad feeling, & that we already had interest from a family who competed in Banger Racing & Demolition Derby as they wanted to be near our local Race Track. Amazingly by shifting their car up a bit there was plenty of room for our one visitor.

Froglady Tue 28-Apr-20 09:57:59

That was supposed to say a brief 'hello' - that's the problem with predictive text! It comes out with weird and wonderful things sometimes if it thinks you've made a mistske. And my mistake in not checking the post before I posted it!

LJP1 Tue 28-Apr-20 09:57:41

Keep being nice. Don't let her take away your humanity.

Froglady Tue 28-Apr-20 09:55:12

On a sort of different theme but similar , at a church I go to on a Tuesday morning, the then vicar used to sidle in, ignoring the group of women at the back of church, which I thought was quite rude - so I made a point of saying 'morning's to him when he came in! After a few weeks of this, he starting acknowledging us. It wasn't that we wanted a long conversation with him, just a brief 'groom's - so I see where you are coming from.

Lindylou23 Tue 28-Apr-20 09:52:45

My OH doest his to any one he knows doesn't speak to him. He will go out if his way to talk to them, as you say the look on their faces.... Priceless

Lucyl Tue 28-Apr-20 09:50:52

Thank you for sharing this, it makes me feel so much better. I am in a social housing property and my neighbour who owns hers has made numerous complaints about me, for having bird feeders in the garden, which is true but it’s not excessive and is allowed but apparently the birds then pop in her garden, damaging the fence, the HA have been out and can’t see any damage at all, having the shed too close to the fence, it’s been in that position since these houses were built and suddenly bothers her now, fortunately I took photos when I moved in which proves the shed was there before I was, all the other peoples sheds on the street are in the same position to their fences. The HA have been very good and can’t see what her problem is but it makes me very anxious as being a tenant I could get evicted if she kicks off, although they’ve said she has no grounds to do so.
She has also regularly blocked my drive despite having a double drive herself but as she owns her house apparently there is nothing I can do about that!
Rant over hope you’re all keeping well x

Elderflower2 Tue 28-Apr-20 09:49:36

This is what happens when boredom sets in, tread carefully lest it escalates. Keep yourself busy with other things and don't concern yourself with her.

Gemini17892 Tue 28-Apr-20 09:47:24

My thoughts for today ( a good day so far )

Cut everyone a bit of slack. You don’t know what’s going on in someone else’s life.

Now if you had asked me yesterday ......?

RosesAreRed21 Tue 28-Apr-20 09:46:05

Let’s hope she hurry's up and sells her place - for your sake. You might get a very nice new neighbour