The Old Argy Bargy Bar.....a new lease of life!

How very dare you cast aspertions on Big Jim's............

I know that man (in the biblical sense) very well! We were secretely married ????on the Argy Day trip to Vegas! ??

No really.......?. Are you sure Marydoll. Was that before or after your fling with Santa.

Oh no! ? I've made a spelling mistake! Aspersions!!!!
The school inspectors will be on the case now.

Doodle, that is for me to know and for you to find out!

I always cast nasturtiums mary......surely mine is the correct word/spelling? ?

Got my shovel and bucket, well sort of ? Doodle, it's a bucket and spade I swiped from a girl at the beach ?. They were just laying there, that my defence (if need be in court) ?. I'm a good gal really, I have brought some fly killer (squirt, squirt). Oops ... picked up the red paint spray instead ?

So much for my pathetic attempt to bake a few pies. Even the birds won't touch them. That's gratitude for you. Anyway, I've uncovered a carton of pork scratchings...left over from the time the inspectors surprised us during one of our riotous parties and closed the place down.
Marydoll has a chequered so-called romantic history. I doubt that she's ever known a man in the "biblical sense". That Santa is still undergoing treatment for his encounter way back when.

I think it means that she has prayed with him Soop ...but I am an innocent wot was raised by nuns.?

soop I think you could well be right. Let’s face it if Marydoll went to Vegas she’d be on the machines not getting married. And as for Big Jim, he’d be downing booze all day. Marydoll probably dreamt it. Either that or she married someone else ? ?. Anyone seen George recently ?

Was that Blue Nuns lemon? How many bottles a day did you have ? ?

Actually, I meant raised by wolves.???
It took years for me to stop eating by putting my head on the plate.☺️

Those pies won't go to waste soop; we're building a Ladies Powder Room outside lavvy and we need some hard-core for the foundations. Just leave them by the back door and put some hazard tape around them.

I'm eager to please, Chewbacca...I've arranged for a skip load of concrete pies to be dumped out the back.

lemon So...we're both innocents raised by nuns.

Raised by nuns???!!! Wolves more like!

Chewbacca Very droll. If only you knew how tough it was. You'd feel a teeny bit remorseful.

Wolves and nuns are actually very similar ( they both take an iron grip to your collar) and are generally fearsome.
The main difference is that wolves are more reasonable.?

Thanks for the hard core pies Soop but how about some of your famous rock cakes as well? Also some haggis slices to sell
As bar snacks.

Once we get the place shipshape and Bristol fashion, we can arrange a Karaoke night.
Doodle has to be seen to be believed dancing and singing to
It’s Raining Men.?

If Marydoll comes in later tell her I’ll get her a pint of her fancy for her birthday. How’s the poteen coming lemon?
OUCH! Just stubbed my toe on a lump of concrete...oh it’s your pies soop . Still turning them out to industry standard I see. ?

I was planning to visit but I've over indulged with the non alcoholic fizz ?and Big Jim is comatose on the couch. So you see, we are married, only married men do that!
I think I might be sick in the newly cleaned lavs, so better not risk it.

Runs off to guzzle her birthday booze in secret and not have to share

So nobody missed me then? I’ve been in this bloody cellar for months. Just me some gin and pork scratchings, oh yes and the one legged admiral ! Good of you to all show up again.

Thank you Lemongrove. I’m now unstuck but can’t stand up as I ate all 3 doughnuts at once. Happy to be called Old ‘cos I am. Menopaws I’ve only just found the Argy Bargy, so didn’t know you were there. I did find a leg in my corner, could it belong to your Admiral?

Oh menopaws you’re all covered in cobwebs. Look at the state of you. Just run down the road to the car wash and get a quick scrub down.

marydoll non alcoholic fizz. Who’re you kidding. You’ve been on the hard stuff. Well I suppose it’s your birthday so you’re allowed. soop made you a birthday cake. We’re using it as a door stop at the moment so you can have some later.

old you still here? Been stuck in the corner since last night. Here have some pork scratching. They’re a bit out of date as they came from the last place but they’re still softer than soop’s cake ?

You'd better not be sick Marydoll birthday girl or no, spent all day cleaning those lavs. Only came up for The Clap at 8, let nobody cast nastersions. ?

I’ve grown very fond of my corner Doodle, but thank you, the pork scratchings will go down nicely on top of the doughnuts.

I’ve enjoyed watching the birthday celebrations and hope to partake of a morsel of cake washed down by a pint of Liebfraumilch. I have a gallon drum here if anyone wants to share.

Liebfraumilch? That's a bit upmarket for here! My liver can't cope with quality?

The clap Lins? There is a lot of it about here!

I’ll join you old. A gallon drum you say. Well that should keep us going for an hour or so. ?
Hope you enjoyed your day Marydoll . You’re not looking too bad for 85. ?