My DDs' fb friends

I love my Facebook. I only accept people I know it know of. On Facebook I have my children, their partners, their partners mum's, some of the parents of children I was a childminder to many years ago ( who found me via Facebook), cousins, my best friends, some old school friends ( who reunited again via Facebook), a few second and 3rd cousins (who found me via Facebook) plus a woman who I was actually her childminder from age 2 until age 9 (who now has a 13 years old!). Plus a few people who I have become very friendly with on other Facebook private groups. I have my all of my grown up nieces and now a couple of great- nieces. We share photos, stories etc. We share funny things about family and also more serious things. When my mum died in march and I was allowed no contact because of covid, it helped me so much. People who knew her were sharing photos of her or memories. Those who didn't were giving support. It helped me so much. It was my son's birthday yesterday, he died age 26 ten years ago. The love and support I got from friends and family on Facebook yesterday was amazing. Photos, memories etc and messages of live being sent. At 6pm many of my Facebook friends and family lit a candle and posted it on Facebook. The love was amazing. Daily I read funny posts, plus funny videos and jokes being shared from You Tube and other places, things of interest. We discuss thing and give points of view (like we do here). I see views of around the world with their photos and I give support to those having a bad day or week. When I had a cancer scare last year I had my Facebook family and friends giving me support. My son who died ...I have all his partners family on my Facebook. Over the 10 years we have shared each others lives still. My son would be so touched about that. I've seen baby's born who he should be uncle to and I've joint in with their family events. Facebook is a positive in my life, it's where we all share lovely things and support each other. It's where we have a moan and where we share our happy moments. Old and young mix together. The young have other groups they also chat on that is more about being in the moment. They have those groups to be with their peers too. People who are not on Facebook have no idea of the pleasure from being in touch, link with things going on and interests ( I belong to many groups about historical facts, local history, interests groups and social groups). The other day I awoke to photos of a newborn baby who had been born in the night ....a ex childminding childs new born. There is no way I would of ever known about or seen that if it weren't for Facebook. It was a wonderful start to my day. You don't have to have anyone you don't know (or those you know but don't what to have) as you have a privacy so only those you've 'added 'can follow you. This is a long post but it's to show how positive Facebook can be. I have a second cousin and we found each other on Facebook. Yesterday she sent me a photo she'd found off my mum in with her mum's old things. I loved at it ....and there was me age 15 standing next to her ......a magical moment because of Facebook as I have no photos of me and my mum together as a teenager. I have 130 people who are in my life via the internet and all it opens up to me. My mum had a Facebook with all her extended family from all over the country on it. We posted her photos of us all going about our day. She was 90 at the time .Wonderful Facebook ?

You can choose who sees each facebook post. You can make a group, for instance, of family and set it so that only they see those posts. You can set it so that all friends except xxxx and xxxx see a post, and that could be the regular setting.

I find it a good way keep up with friends from different areas of my life. I am not able to go out much to see them and to events but this is a nice way to stay in touch with what is happening in their lives.

Also it is possible to find a group dedicated to most things that interest one. There are ones for certain authors or health conditions, or hobbies. Those are usually closed , and then you can start one that is closed and just those you want to chat to join, and it can be hidden too. A friend set one up and we're all trying to lose weight by different methods and support each other,.

I don't want to pry into my adult children's friendship groups

Oh, that made me think.
However, they always seem to want to include us in RL too.

Ps I've never sent a friend request.

Most FB users are well aware who sees what and will not give you access to people or posts they don't want you to see. These things can be set.

My FB friends are mostly my farflung family, kittylester.

Apart from a couple of groups and a few old friends, that's it.
I have a list of people I know, or are friends of my DC who have asked to be 'my friend' but I ignore it.

I am friends on facebook with several of the friends of my adult children (ages 47 and 49), following requests from them. I don't often comment and if they are not happy they can always unfriend me.

I had 3 Facebook friends, my DS, my DD and my oldest friend because that is all of I wanted. You are quite right that Facebook suggests other friends and I must have inadvertently clicked on two at some time. I am now friends with my oldest friend’s son and my nephew. ( I must say I do enjoy looking at their posts but wondered what they thought when they received a friend request from me!)

I am friends with my ex-teachers (not all of them) and my ex-pupils (not all of them); and with some of my neighbours and their children and some of my ex-schoolmates. Facebook suggests people I would rather not be friends with (so I don't ask), but sometimes I see the faces of old workmates or friends from my youth, and yes, then I click on the Friend Request button. I also have friends who are authors of books I have edited, and others in writing books or groups of similar interests, and random people I meet in real life. No one from here, though, as far as I know.

I always find it interesting that the main critics of FB are the people who are not on it. I have friend who will not join because she doesn't want everyone knowing her business.

You only put on FB what you want people to know. You can restrict certain people, even though they are friends, from seeing certain posts. Everything you put up there is not for all to see.

I am often surprised who does request me as a friend as I am those who follow me on Instagram especially as I never post on Instagram.

I’m not on Facebook either, Id heard to many negative stories about it so decided it wasn’t for me. However, if I was, to answer your question, I wouldn’t be friends with my DDs friends I feel they should be in there own circle of friends minus anyone’s mums.

My own family tell me to have fb or wats app etc but i refuse.

Agree with doodle and shysal

I'm on Facebook but on my terms. My profile has very little personal information publicly available and I tend to use closed groups.

I have found it useful for finding volunteers to help me by collecting prescriptions during the Covid-19 outbreak, about local services on offer (delivered roast dinners - I'm thinking about them, but cream teas - mmmhhh!). I've also sold a few things via the local Fb group, those interested have made an appointment and turned up with cash, and I've also bought a really good second hand bike for one of my GDs (before Coronavirus).

I get support from others in a closed group with similar immune conditions and dip into acquaintance's posts sometimes.

I see familiar names, friends of my DC, but would not dream of contacting them. Perhaps I will look at Fb a couple of times a day at most but I find it useful sometimes.

On the couple of occasions that I have received friend requests from my adult children's friends, I have just assumed that they had made the requests by accident, so have ignored them!
I'm not sure what that says about my self esteem

I am not facebook friends with my D or my GC.They will tell me what I need to know and I wouldn't want to know what I don't need to know or inhibit what they talk about with their friends.
I trust them implicitly.

I’m friends with my DDs but I don’t follow them, so I don’t see what they post. I’m mostly friends with people I went to school with or who are on FB groups relating to where I grew up .
My GCs think that FB is for old people and they are on Twitter or Instagram.

I can understand if someone asks you if they can be your friend ( sorry I don’t know the lingo) but if you ask your children’s friends if you can be friends with them what can they do? If they say no, they stand the chance of offending their friends mum, if they say yes, can they ever post again anything that is private they don’t want you to know? I know nothing of FB so don’t understand how it works. If your children want to post something to their friends that the don’t want you to read, can they do so without you knowing that it’s there and they don’t want you to read it? Sorry not phrased it well but I hope you get my drift.

FB keeps me in touch with far-flung friends and family. What I really dislike is having colleagues friend request me. I like to keep work and private life separate. Because of this, I'm a lot more careful what I post these days.

I love FB. Yes I have requested my children’s friends as FB friends as sometimes I have developed a friendship with them apart from my children. Usually I would wait for their requests. It is good, however, to see how they are especially their Dutch friends.

I know I and my DC only put on FB what they want people to know. So, yes I am friends with my DC.

I find FB more secure than Gransnet. I can choose there who sees my post. I never post photos, for example, of my DCC on Gransnet as they are open to all to see even the press.

I'm friends with the girl who was our neighbour's daughter and DD's best friend. I always found her a bit wet as a child but 30 years on we have an awful lot in common. I'm also friends with a pair of twins who were DD's friends but I will probably drop them because they both drink lot and tend to have violent emotional outbursts all over Facebook. Really don't need it.

I totally agree with Doodle and others who feel it would be intrusive. I don't need to know what my family are all doing, nor do they have to know what I am up to!

I am not on Facebook but if I was I would not be friends with my children or grandchildren as I think they should have some privacy in their contacts with their friends. I suppose in the same way I would not want them to be on GN and know what I’m writing (not that I’ve said anything other than loving things about them). I am curious kitty so your children and grandchildren read your GN threads?

i would be wary of who you add as a friend.they might not be who you think they are.i wouldnt send ANY friend requests of my daughters.. my fb page is for friends/penpals/relatives .anyone else gets a delete.

I’m “friends” with all my family and just like you, also, some of their close friends.
But, as you say, I would never send a “Friend Request” to any of their friends , as that would be weird, even if I knew them pretty well in real life.