Should I be so upset?

I do understand why you are hurt but I think it’s just the world we live in now. We got a text when my step daughter gave birth and I found that so impersonal. I’m very fortunate that my own two children didn’t do that but I’m sure lots do. Try to forgive him and just be happy that your grandchild has arrived safely. He probably wasn’t thinking as it’s such an emotional time. I’m sure he would be upset if he knew you were hurt but you don’t want to detract from such wonderful happiness during such a horrid episode in our history. Congratulations. This will be a distant memory soon ?

Congratulations Glamnan. I'm sure your son will contact you very soon, Things are so different nowadays and he probably thought he'd let everyone know by the quickest and easiest method instead of individual phone calls. I'm sorry about the need for antibiotic intervention but it's good that they did it so quickly. As soon as he's got a spare two minutes from discovering how his new child is the most perfect baby that ever was born he'll be eager to tell you all about it. Congratulations again, and enjoy every minute of this exciting time.

Sometimes it is more of a 'son' thing. Daughters often want their mum around straight after a birth for a comforting hug after what they have been through but sons are often overwhelmed by the whole experience and don't always understand how much their own parents have been anxious to know that things have gone well and safely. Added to that the extra pressures of the corona virus will have added more hurdles to overcome at the hospital. I would be inclined to send a text full of congratulations, love and good wishes.

Perhaps we currently has other things on his mind.

Congratulations on your new grandchild.
Sadly social media is the way of the young.
My only son lives about 5 hours away , in Hertfordshire,and when my grandson, now 5, was due I heard nothing but sent an email that evening to say hope my daughter in-law was well and surely they wouldn't have long to go, only to get a text about half an hour later to be told he had been born that morning!
I was asked not to visit but knowing he was likely to be an only child as they had already said so I could not wait months to be invited so after 2 weeks I booked an overnight hotel in London and took a train to visit, I told them I was doing it and would not stay long. He was wonderful and yes my daughter in law was struggling, it was much more traumatic than she had imagined and he refused to breast feed.
I do not regret it but be warned they still don't let us see him much now

I know exactly how you feel as my son n DIL are the same. I find out on Facebook if anyone is in hospital, school play, camping trip, learned to swim etc etc. Never get invited to school plays concerts etc either. Any photos I see are on Facebook too. Birthday party invites are coffee and cake at the house an hour before bedtime to give a gift and say hello.
But at least we see the DGC about once a month when they visit.

Red1

Children grow up and as adults, they make decisions that are the best for them, impact on other people (except minor children or partner) is a very minor factor, if it even deserves any consideration

It is very selfish of you to make your son's life about you.

Don't take this amiss, Glamnan123, but the "senior granny" is usually the maternal granny. And she must be really anxious for her daughter at this time.
Be a little patient, you will get more news from your son soon.

Oh don't be too upset. The boy is probably exhausted. He messaged after all. My grandson ( 1st grandchild) was born and my sister knew before I did It was in the days before mobile phones and she happened to phone between me trying to make contact. You've got the rest of this babies life to know and love him..

Congratulations to you all!

When my eldest son & wife have their child soon, he will ring me, but only cause he knows i dont/wont have whats app & facebook etc.

Social media is the "go to" method now. Like you think I would have expected to be in on the news a bit more personally rather than a blanket family announcement. Can't change what's happened though so look forward to being able to meet your Grandchild. Congratulations.

When my daughter gave birth we got a text from her husband. It's the way it is now. Dont be upset, they are in a little bubble just now.

I would be hurt and even though going through the birthing process with your partner is an exhausting time, he found the energy to announce the arrival on social media to all the rest of the family. I really think a quick call to say hello you are a Grandma was in order and a matter of good manners. You are his mother and the child's grandmother, even if he'd have just sent you a text or a private message first would have been something. I totally get why you are hurt, it's like you don't matter enough. This is a huge thing in your boy's life and you are hurt that he didn't care to share the news with you first, his mum, and he just lumped you in with all the rest of the family. It's not the same as getting a new puppy or kitten is it. The thing now is how you move forward. Sometimes as parents we simply have to swallow the hurt that is dealt to us on occasions by our offspring, unintentional as it may be in this case. Men are notoriously bad at times of actually 'thinking' !

Congratulations Glamnan!! Lots of joy and fun times ahead !!!
Whatsapp is the main form of communication in our family as well. My 3 children and their families live in the same town......it's not always possible to get together or to phone one another regularly. So we have a family whatsapp group and instead of making several individual phonecalls to pass messages, we do a family chat. It works well for us .

Glamnan, congratulations. It will be lovely for you when you can meet your GC. I think I have learned to keep my mouth shut and smile!

You are allowed to feel hurt and it's ok to be sensitive however the thing to be aware of is having expectations of anything in the first place.

So - it's not really that your son has upset you but more that your expectation did.

Letting go of expectations is a step towards being happier.

Congratulations.

I would probably be hurt too, but that is because we haven't fully embraced WhatsApp, etc. We expect a phone call. My parents' generation were upset if they only got a phone call. They expected a printed card, as well. Something along the lines of the newspaper announcement, To Dr and Mrs NN a daughter.

Times change.

The important thing is that it seems to have gone well.

For goodness sake, how long does a phone call take!!!

Well when our children have their own family we become fourth down the line after spouse and children!

After 3 years I have come to the sad conclusion that being a grandmother is a one-way street with the parents of one's grandchild. I focus on my little granddaughter, who is a joy.
I cook with her mainly in mind and buy books, toys and clothing for her, which makes me happy and expect nothing much in return from her parents. Western countries such as ours do not respect older relatives in the way that others do.

I would give them a day then you ring . My husband was bewildered when our first was born . Concerned for me and the baby . Terrified of driving us home etc . They may both have a little more time to talk tomorrow.

Congratulations firstly- best job in the world being a Grandma!!
I am sure your son meant no slight. He is undoubtedly exhausted & emotional & obviously worried about his family. I am sure everything will be fine & once the antibiotics kick in everything will look better & he can relax a bit.
I always feel sorry for the new dad. My husband was really good but I have never seen him look so haggard as he did after the birth of our first son which was a bit traumatic & he had to leave the room ( in those days they were very strict about that if things looked like going wrong).
Poor man.
I'm sure by now you have had an update & all is well & you can soon cuddle your new GC.

Glamnan123. Congratulations on becoming a Grandmother!

I agree with Doodle. Send them a very loving message and welcome to the new baby. Your son will be so delighted to hear from you.

Please try to put aside your expectations and think about what you can do to make things easier for them at the moment. Don't think about your title as grandmother but what being a new grandmother is to you. How you were informed of the event doesn't change that at all