Grandmafrench, it very nearly did split the family as my GD was castigated for not being a proper mother but sadly wasn't getting the help with the child when it was so badly needed especially during the times when the child's dad was ill, before he died.
We can honestly say that the family were let down in the past when my GD struggled on with a sick partner and a child who didn't know how to behave and who used to keep the other children awake at night with her tantrums and shouting. No wonder her mother had a breakdown and had to part with all the children in the end because she wasn't coping.
The 3 youngest are still in foster care and my D who is the children's nan, the mother of my GD ( mother of the children ) , are doing well. Three older ones are with my D who is coping well.
It has been remarked at how lovely the children are and well looked after----which they were until their dad became very ill and their mother, my GD, just folded.
GD had been staying with my step-D having counselling and various health visitors, but it's still early days as it's only been 4 months since her partner died.
Everything has been fast-tracked it's hardly given us any time to think straight at what's happened, though we feel very lucky that everyone from every direction pulled out all the stops----maybe realising that help should have been there a long time ago ?
It doesn't seem possible that one child can rock the boat so much as to cause a family explosion as she had done. It was like attention-seeking on a massive scale of destruction as well as fear for the younger ones safety with her. Yet butter wouldn't melt to those who didn't know her.
So yes, any treatment is definitely welcome before she eventually joins her siblings. She is medicated of course but to what extent we don't yet know ,as her mother will be told of this rather than grannies.
To me personally, it's as though the child would have been happier being " the only child ". She is fine with both my D and myself and very loving but we don't know and can't see how she is with others. We do know that the school she was attending here was no good for her because she was copying their behaviour which was bad and also constantly swearing so we've told the health visitors that we don't want her going back to that type of school.
Of course this virus hasn't helped, it appearing at the wrong time---if there is a wrong time for a virus.
It's the girl's 12th birthday on Sunday so D and the children and their mother will be heading off to see her. That'll be 4 birthdays that I've missed seeing the children this year. Another one next month which I'll also miss. Don't know about November yet.
Thankyou so much Grandmafrench xx Try not to get too frazzled in your beautiful weather---covered in cloud here.
