My friend is a right wing racist

If you genuinely no longer wish to be friends with her, then simply block her. Problem sorted

Cant you block her?

You can do without that sort of ‘friend.’ Don’t answer. She’ll give up on you eventually.

icanhandthemback

I wouldn't just give up an acquaintance because they were racist. I firmly believe you cannot affect change if there is no communication so I would take the opportunity to call out overt racism. That said, if they continued to be overtly racist, I would find that toxic so I would feel obliged to tell them exactly why I was cutting connection and then do it. What I wouldn't do is "ghost" them because they won't know what is so offensive about them. Although you might have very good reasons for cutting them out of your life, they learn nothing from being ghosted and even feel they own the moral high ground.

I agree with all you have said here Ican.

Bodach I think you'll find that most of the posters are able to differentiate between right wing and racism, and most have said that differing political views can be managed within a friendship whereas dealing with blatant racism cannot.

Pantglas2

I had a work colleague I stayed friends with for years after I’d moved to another country - she was to the far left and very anti Semitic. I chose not to pick up again when I returned to Wales.

Politics is one thing I don’t feel the need to approve of in my friends but racism is a step too far, whichever direction it comes from.

Left wing is not anti semitic. Please dont buy all the Dailly Mail nonsense. Corbyn actually said of the report yesterday that there may be some in Labour and they need to ho. The real story is that anti semitism in Labour is no more than in the general population and must be got rid of.
It was a stitch up to keep Corbyn out of power aided by traitors or red Tories within the party.
We have been lied to. Racism of any kind is wrong. Corbyn has been fighting it all his life. Truly shocking what is happening in this country.

I dropped someone last year because of her racist views and outwardly racist behaviour in public! It was horrible, I was deeply offended and ashamed to be out with her after she verbally abused a lady in the street ? Not what I was expecting from her, a lady in her 60s working in the care sector!!
There were other issues but that really was the final straw.
You can only do what your own conscious will allow you to in the end. Good luck

SilentGames: you beat me to it. I was about to say that a newly-arrived Martian reading this thread could be forgiven for assuming that 'right-wing' and 'racist' are one and the same, or at least inextricably linked. In fact, the Martian - and many of the posters who conflate the two for their own ends - would be quite wrong. Being racist, in any form or guise, is wrong; being right-wing is not.

I ended my friendship with someone who turned out to be racist. It's the only way to get across to them that it's totally unacceptable.

She sounds like a bully. She is in fact a frenemy. Not a friend. I’ve been friends with people for 6 and 9 years and I’ve had to let them go. I have two lovely friends now and that’s all I need. We can have differences of opinion without mortal combat. The friend of 9 years I fell out with over something that was her fault. We got back together but it was never the same and that incident was always in the background so we parted company. I realised the other lady was just using me as an electronic spittoon (email) about another friend of hers who despite constantly badmouthing her to me still kept in contact with her. I just removed myself from that association.

It was in the middle of a meal with other friends, so I explained my reasons and departed, I had to do that once too. It was very difficult as I was a guest in someone's home, but one of their other guests was holding forth with his bigotry and racism as we all sat in appalled silence. Eventually, with an apology to our host I got up to leave saying that I couldn't sit there and listen any longer without starting a huge argument and I considered leaving the table, and their house the least rude thing to do. I understand that the following morning, the racist was mortified at his behaviour, but he did not apologise and just blamed it on 'the drink', personally I think that excess alcohol reveals our true selves as the societal and behavioural controls are forgotten.

I stopped seeing a friend who was racist. Whenever we met she just couldn’t keep from saying things like ‘they’re building new houses in the village - all for immigrants of course’. I got fed up with staying silent or tackling the issue, so I rang her and said we had too little in common to continue. It took a lot of courage to do it, though!

Send one last message, like others advise, telling her that your friendship has ended because of her political views and her racism. Then block her on every single means of communication. Fortunately she is in another country.
I had to end a friendship once - with a neighbour - because I realise she had started bullying me and being spiteful, plus talking about me behind my back. I asked to see her and said that I'd come to the decision that our friendship was over, and why. That I would always cherish the many kindnesses that she and her husband had shown me, but I would not put up with her bullying and spite. I missed her for the good things but it did the trick.

Block from everywhere but tell her first why you're blocking her.

Nope, life is too short and your health a priority. Save your good self for those who appreciate you for who you are and what you stand for. By all means, if it makes you feel better, tell her in no uncertain terms that you simply can not and will not tolerate her attitude as it is detrimental to your well-being and say goodbye. I too have clung onto 'old friends' while biting my lip but their toxicity lasts longer than the time I spend with them. Nope, write her off. I know it sounds cruel and heartless but you are being used for her to vent her feelings and dumping them on you. Does she listen to your version of your truth? I doubt it. I hope you will spend your time with people who are not necessarily 'on your side' but with those who can hold interesting and challenging adult debates and share their views without prejudice, that way we can all learn something

Racist because you don’t agree with her or that she is a Trump supporter. You obviously have not listened to some of Michelle Obama’s speeches! Goodness me you would think she would like to avoid US white people like the plague. She says we are racist just for being white. This racism accusation going on is getting really silly now. Just tell your friend, if want to stay friends, that you really don’t want to fall out over politics.

I've never thought my friends' politics had anything to do with our friendship (or their religion either for that matter). But then most of my old friends date from the days we all marched for equal rights, civil rights and so on. I made new friends when I had my children but they didn't much last as all we had in common was our children and when the kids left nursery, and school and moved on so did we. I think people come in and out of your life all the time and friendships sometimes just run their course and that's it.

I don’t agree with blocking and ghosting people. If you don’t want to be friends any longer be honest and say so and give your reasons.

Just be straight with her.And also explain you dont want more than a 'send christmas& birthday cards' friendship as you really cant manage more than that right now.I dont have whats app so dont know but is there a way to block her on it? Might be the only way.If not tell your 'real friends' and your family that you are not havìng whats app for a bit and why.then delete it or whatever you do with it.She will get the hint. Then 're-join' it in a few mths time.it might be the only way.Your real friends/family know where you are and have your phone number etc. Or consider also changing your number if shes got access to it anyway.

I wouldn't just give up an acquaintance because they were racist. I firmly believe you cannot affect change if there is no communication so I would take the opportunity to call out overt racism. That said, if they continued to be overtly racist, I would find that toxic so I would feel obliged to tell them exactly why I was cutting connection and then do it. What I wouldn't do is "ghost" them because they won't know what is so offensive about them. Although you might have very good reasons for cutting them out of your life, they learn nothing from being ghosted and even feel they own the moral high ground.

I wouldn’t be friends with someone who was blatantly racist and right-wing for the simple reason that I would not like them (or go off them big time) so it wouldn’t be worth the effort. The friendship will dwindle and die off if you don’t respond to her.

As others have said be very firm, say you value her friendship but you do not discuss politics. As you can block and later unblock a WhatsApp caller you may wish to say that if she does bring up politics again you will block her until after the election etc.

faq.whatsapp.com/android/security-and-privacy/how-to-block-and-unblock-a-contact/?lang=en

Just block her on WhatsAp. It is simple to do.

I think the only thing you can do is to be blunt.

Tell her that you have obviously lived very different lives since you were schoolgirls and that you cannot accept her racist views.

This being so, you no longer wish to know her and will not answer her calls in future.

I never use whatsapp, so I don't know whether you can block her number, but if so, do so.

Otherwise you will just have to ignore her attempts to get in touch.

A Cruel but simple remedy..... Block her number. A great advantage with mobiles?