You should make an effort...

I let my hair grow out into it's natural white colour in the first lockdown, I realised last week that it makes me look softer and gentler and I look o.k. without make up. At first I would not leave the bathroom without it as I did not recognize who 'I was' anymore. Now I am o.k. with who I am. I can wear colours now that I would not have worn before. Not old lady pale colours by the way. I was very into black before or navy but I realise maybe with a base of either of those I can wear other clearer or muted clearer colours if that makes sense.

My friend’s daughter V is a very attractive 30 year old with long straight red hair. She’s got unblemished cream skin, very slim and clever too. Last Christmas as they had dinner, her FIL spent a couple of minutes staring at her - then said ‘you know what V, if you were blonde you’d be stunning’.
Thankfully her husband jumped in and my friend said his Dad was lucky she didn’t have a sharp knife to hand. How rude and uncalled for!

Rude,rude,rude.

It's surprising how long a thread can run caused by a remark made to a person by another person made in all innocent but now has a name like mud!

I certainly need to put eyebrows on each day since they never grew back properly from plucking so thinly as a teenager! saving on lipstick though!

I think make up can look a bit ridiculous and ugly unless you’re Liza Minnelli doing cabaret.

How rude! I must admit I've always loved make up,I think it started as a child when my mum was an Avon rep! I've never worn loads but would always have mascara and lipstick. Since March I haven't been going anywhere so rarely wear it, I must admit my skin looks better.

Don't let someone else's lack of manners upset you. I'm sure that you are careful of the feelings of others which is why her actions sting. Let it go. Be happy. Someone who seeks ways to put others down is obviously not.
I wear make up all the time because I choose to do so. I don't care what others think about that. I once met up with a group of women from work, one of whom made pointed comments about older women who wore makeup looking stupid - pointedly looking at me. Some of the group were friends I rarely see and rather than sour the opportunity to be with them I bit my tongue, though I would dearly have loved to hit back. I've since realised that whatever motivates people like that they are just best avoided.

Desperately RUDE. How dare they!

Some years back a male colleague who knew both my husband and myself suggested I should dye my hair 'for your husband'.

It took all the control and good breeding instilled in me by 12 years in a nuns' school not to floor him.

The truth is that my husband would NEVER suggest anything of the sort.

You are you, make up or not. It is a question of personal choice.

Vampirequeen. That was very rude. I stopped wearing make 37 years ago when I had my daughter hadn't got the time to bother. I have only had make up on a couple of times since and that was for my children's weddings. I am 62. Have wrinkles and pale skin and times when I am in a lot of pain look haggard but I don't care. I am me. My skin is lovely and soft and I like my face as it is. My dark brown hair has a lot of silver grey which I love.

I hate it when people make personal comments they wouldn't like it if you said something about their appearance.

We are all individuals and should embrace who we are. The old saying never judge a book by it's cover is so true. I know someone who is beautiful on the outside but is a horrible person.

Be who you want to be and love yourself.

I haven't worn make up of any sort since I was in my 30s, and even then it was only a dab of lippy and mascara if I went out anywhere, like the theatre or a concert etc. Now I'm in my 60s I have a good skin and I don't care. DH has always said he isn't keen on women wearing make up anyway. My daughter aged 35 wore a bit in her teens but quickly grew out of it. And she has a lovely skin and looks gorgeous. But - I would have been angry with what was said to you. Maybe you can make an excuse for her. She's obviously a daft sad old bat who is desperately trying to look young. We have a neighbour in her 80s like that, hair dyed very yellow blonde, cakes herself in make up, bright red lipstick, and even had a lip injection at the age of 83. It makes her look older rather than younger. Take no notice!

Many years ago when I'd just returned to work after a miscarriage and I was still looking as white as a sheet, a colleague said I should put on some make-up and brighten myself up. I answered 'I am wearing make-up!'

I've never understood why women feel the need to wear make up but men don't.

Probably because men aren't judged on their looks by other men, as well as by women.

What an interesting set of responses. I agree with everyone who thought the 'suggestion' was both unkind and rude. I used to work in a client facing job so wearing make up was just something I took for granted that I needed to do. I kept up the habit for a while once I returned then one day I thought "why am I doing this". So I stopped and I felt a bit exposed for a while but now I never give make up a second thought. And I feel very content to wear the face my years have brought to me without embellishment. Except for when I go to an event for which dressing up is necessary, Then putting on some slap is quite a fun novelty. We must all be allowed to make the decisions for ourselves which work for us without busy bodies sticking an unwanted oar in.

It is liberating in lockdown, to choose to not wear makeup, also not to have to buy makeup.

Infuriating to be told to wear it. We all look more natural without it “vampire queen” take no notice of people when they say things like that.

Vampirequeen, I haven't worn makeup for well over 30 years, maybe longer.....not even to my children's weddings! I feel much better in myself not wearing any, as well as not spending money on it.
I have been complimented on my skin looking good in the past. My two daughters take after me, they don't wear it either!

I too was brought up to consider the making of personal remarks rude.

Try to ignore her.

In my young days, I would not have gone anywhere without mascara, eye-shadow and lipstick on, plus a touch of face powder.

Now at 69, I don't usually bother.

My grandmother would have called your rude acquaintance "mutton dressed as lamb".

I’d call that comment rude.
I do wear a bit of make up (eyes, blusher) because it makes ME feel good.
If you don’t want to or choose not to, don’t.

I thought I had this problems many years ago. Turned out it was soap from usual washing routine eg hair hardening in the holes. Advised by beautician to just squeeze hole as if it was a blackhead and plug would come out. Worked, no problem. Worth a try if you ever have situation again.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I have only worn makeup occassionally and have always felt better without. My Grandma never wore any and always said make sure you always moisturise. I followed her advice, I have always been told I look young for my age and never felt I made a good job of using make up when I did use it.Perhaps this lady was brought up to believe that make up was part of a daily care routine and probably feels a lady should wear heels as well! Make up fashion these days seems to churn out shiny faced,plump lipped people who all look the same. I wonder how they will take to their older years.

I haven’t worn make up for years either, so liberating. When the discussion has come up I usually say ‘Why should I bother? I don’t have to look at me anyway!’

I agree that men have it easy in not having to trouble themselves with make up.

Vampire Queen, I use to have the same thing. I don't want to wear makeup so I don't and one day I had the same comment as you. Mt reply was If god wanted me to wear War paint, I would have been born with it. They fell silent and it was never mentioned again. Why should you have to wear it, its a choice we have I would like to, I don;t want to. I like you wondered the same thing, would I work harder, would all my pain go away, and the answer is No. You are beautiful in your own skin, you wear born the way you are, no make up, so why spoil abeautiful face.

I have never used make up - apart from a bit of lipstick when going out. It never stays on however and I can’t be doing with re-applying it. I think I’m lucky to have reasonably good and clear skin however. I remember when I was about 15 - a very long time ago- I thought I’d try some liquid stuff and eye make up. Went downstairs and my brothers couldn’t stop laughing ?- saying I looked like a clown - so that was the last time I used it!!

I have never worn much make up, either, and a number of people have commented that "I look younger than my age" or that I "have nice skin". As has been said already, it is very much a personal choice as to how much, if any make-up you choose to wear. I would definitely have made some comment in return, though probably not a rude one. My face would have communicated my feelings, in any event!