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Eddie Izzard

(571 Posts)
FarNorth Thu 24-Dec-20 13:11:03

www.theguardian.com/culture/2020/dec/21/eddie-izzard-to-use-female-pronouns-she-and-her

Is Eddie brave in asking for she/her pronouns and staying in girl mode?

I wonder if it will become usual for men to do this.

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 22:37:37

"If ifs and ands were pots and pans" as my mum used to say.
If someone really wants to assault a woman he can do it anywhere. Why bother to go into a safe space? Go into a public loo. No one will stop you. There isn't a police man or woman on the door. Do it in a back lane. It''s much easier.

Callistemon Wed 30-Dec-20 22:01:15

Chewbacca

^I let my hair grow and I started to define myself as non-binary, because I love the best of both^ of sides of the spectrum: I love gorgeous long blond hair, along with regular man clothes, and
a touch of spice with my nail polish.

So where does that leave women, when a man can just select which bits of femininity they want to embrace that day?

because I love the best of both of sides of the spectrum
So where does that leave women

even later in the same day, having gained access to a safe space for women, when Arthur/Britney decides to embrace his masculine side of the spectrum?

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 21:34:22

Rosie51 I've said it before but I appreciate you probably didn't read it then. If someone stands beside me, if they look like a woman, if they are active about issues that affect women (like period poverty, waspie women, women's health issues) if they say they are a woman, present as a woman and identify as a woman I am willing to accept them as my sister. I don't propose to ask for a birth certificate or examine their genitals.

I trust the women running refuges to protect all the vulnerable inhabitants in their care because that is the field they have expertise in. Not to do so is not only insulting it's dangerous.

I've said before some men rape, some men are violent some men are liars some men are criminals, but we don't punish all men because of that, why on earth should we punish all transpeople because of the actions or opinions of one or two?

Doodledog At no time have I ever made personal or abusive remarks about you on this thread. I do not know you. I do think your vegetarian argument completely out of place on this thread but I attempted to use that analogy so you might better understand my point of view, which actually you ignored. When you accused me of over simplyfying and not giving answers I actually replied to each of your points although the actual concept, that you have choice, remains the same, I bothered to give you specifics and details. For taking that time and effort you accuse me of "giving you the runaround". As for cutting and pasting if I use a quote I always make sure it is indicated by italics.
Of course it is possible for anyone not to know their rights that includes young people taken to police stations, children in schools who are sometimes excluded for inadequate reasons, and many other people. It isn't an exclusive preserve of young women and it is best addressed through activism and education, two areas I have been active in all my life. It has never been progressed or developed by simply victimising one section of society. It needs better communication and implementation of human rights standards in all areas. I am proud of my own record in that area, particularly with children's rights.

Chewbacca Wed 30-Dec-20 20:53:32

I let my hair grow and I started to define myself as non-binary, because I love the best of both of sides of the spectrum: I love gorgeous long blond hair, along with regular man clothes, and
a touch of spice with my nail polish.

So where does that leave women, when a man can just select which bits of femininity they want to embrace that day?

Chewbacca Wed 30-Dec-20 20:44:40

Arthur Britney Joestar is a non binary person from El Salvador who has this week been given refugee status to remain in the UK and be allowed to refer to himself as "she". They will now be allowed to be in a changing room, public toilet, any femail shared space, volunteer with any femail organisation, be in a hospital bed next to you, share a prison cell and, if so qualified, carry out any medical examinations. I'm not comfortable with this.

Rosie51 Wed 30-Dec-20 20:30:44

trisher are you totally unable to understand and empathise with women in refuges that are triggered by the presence of anyone with a male body, even if that male body identifies as a transwoman? Why do you think refuges don't have male staff, or allow older male children to stay with their mothers and female siblings? Not because the staff aren't able to do their best safeguarding vetting but because the presence of these individuals is traumatic to some women.
Why do we not allow all our lovely partners, fathers, sons, brothers free access to the few women only spaces? Not because every one of them is a threat to women, but because a minority are, so we ban them all because there's no simple way to tell. Self ID for transwomen totally negates this restriction.
May I ask what your definition/s of a woman is/are? Mine are the dictionary ones: adult human female; the sex that is intended to produce large gametes.

Doodledog Wed 30-Dec-20 20:26:05

As I am sure you are aware, trisher, you are twisting what I am saying.

All of the examples I gave are of circumstances in which a woman might not feel able to say no, or to ask for someone else. I am not suggesting that refuges are likely to refuse help, but that a vulnerable woman might feel that this could happen. Similarly, you brought up the sexual preferences or marital status of practitioners, not me - are you cutting and pasting from something? That bit is entirely irrelevant, and cuts off rather abruptly. . .

Actually, I give up. It is clear that you are giving me the runaround here. If you bother to engage at all, it is to ask me to explain for the umpteenth time things that others grasped the first time, and I'm not playing any more.

I have no reason to assume that you are stupid, so the fact that you are claiming not to realise that the burger analogy was a metaphor rather than a food obsession, and that it is perfectly possible for a vulnerable woman not to realise that she can opt out of a difficult situation, particularly if she has been lied to (by omission or otherwise) would suggest that you are gaslighting me.

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 20:00:36

No one has said there isn't abuse or women aren't sexually assaulted by men. It is seldom transwomen who do this though.
hugshelp if you really don't trust the women running women's refuges to do their job then there really isn't any point in having them is there? After all if they are as inadequate as you think women won't be safe in them anyway.

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 19:53:18

What if there is a language barrier, and the woman is unable to express her wish to have a different examiner?
If you've accessed services including the NHS they try their best to find an interpreter but it is sometimes difficult for all people using health, social and education services, But it's a funding problem across the board and nothing to do with women (although some women do bring with them a male relative who may or may not be translating the woman's needs appropriately, especially with an injury)
What if she is young and lacks of confidence, or is worried about giving offence by asking if the rather masculine looking nurse is really a woman?
Well actually the rather masculine looking nurse may well be a woman. But perhaps if she is so young and vulnerable she should have an appropriate adult with her. My friend's daughter has Aspergers she's 20+ her mother accompanies her on medical appointments.
What if she has been raped and is suffering from PTSD?
From the NHS website
There are also specially trained advisers available in some SARCs or voluntary organisations to help people who have been sexually assaulted. These independent sexual violence advisers (ISVA) can help victims get access to the other support services they need.
The forensic medical examination usually takes place at a SARC or in a police suite. The examination is carried out by a doctor or nurse specially trained in sexual assault forensic medicine.
I'm no expert but that seems to cover it.
What if she is not aware that she has a right to refuse?
The right to ask for a different practitioner and to refuse examination should be displayed in hospitals and health centres. But actually in my experience most health practitioners ensure that you are happy explaining what they are going to do and asking permission beforehand.
What if she simply doesn't realise that the trans woman is not a biological female?
Does that matter? I don't know the sexual preferences of any health professional. I don't know their religion, I don't know their marital status. Because none of those things impact on the treatment I receive
What if she is afraid that if she is not co-operative she will lose her room in the hostel and have to take her children back to the man who beat her?
Would you like to withdraw this question? It implies that the workers in women's refuges are not only inadequate they are judgemental and vengeful.
It may well be the case that the law says that people have a right to refuse or withdraw from treatment or to ask in a police station for a different rape counsellor, or to leave a changing room in single sex swimming baths, or whatever, but that doesn't mean that it will always work like that. And why should women always be the ones to shuffle up and make space for men, just because they want us to?
You don't have to shuffle up unless you want to. There's room on the ark for us all.

Iam64 Wed 30-Dec-20 19:44:31

daft - that says a lot about the person making the comment, dismissing any concerns, like those expressed by the women in Chewbacca's post.
It feels very like the way in which women used to be dismissed by mental health professionals, the police, etc when they complained they were being controlled by emotional abuse.

hugshelp Wed 30-Dec-20 19:43:43

Do you not think the NHS use safety assesments?

And yet:
www.independent.co.uk/news/health/nhs-sexual-assault-patients-mental-health-mixed-sex-wards-a9273656.html

theconversation.com/they-wouldnt-let-me-call-anybody-women-in-mental-health-wards-need-better-protection-from-sexual-assault-131998

Callistemon Wed 30-Dec-20 19:42:27

It wont encourage Scottish women to seek refuge, will it.
The attitude sounds flippant.

hugshelp Wed 30-Dec-20 19:39:35

So some people who work in refuges think its ok. Therefore the suffering of actual women, is irrelevant. Is that your point trisher.

Of course those risk assessments mean women never get abused. Frankly for someone who works at a refuge to call the legitimate fears of women 'daft' speaks to me of something other than professional objectivity.

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 19:32:08

As counter to that from women working in refuges in Scotland
The general resounding response was that every refuge space in Scotland is risk assessed and done so together with any survivor looking to access it. That means there’s balanced consideration of the safety and wellbeing of all their service users, every time. Every worker I spoke to confirmed that if a trans woman wasn’t able to access refuge it would not be on the basis that she was trans.

As a side note, this is why it sounds so daft when people run with: what if an abusive man pretends to be a woman on the basis of self ID in order to access a woman’s refuge? Firstly, where actually is the man who’s getting up to this because I’ve yet to see him (don’t answer that, it’s not a real question) and secondly, is that no more than a wee bit insulting to practitioners who I think would mibby know their perps from their survivors? Naw? Well failing that, they’ve got robust risk assessments in place anyway, and they use them all the time
.

hugshelp Wed 30-Dec-20 19:28:38

Yes, thank you Chewbacca

Iam64 Wed 30-Dec-20 19:20:01

Thanks Chewbacca

SueDonim Wed 30-Dec-20 19:19:45

trisher

Doodledog I don't know how many times do I have to say it. You are always free to refuse, to withdraw, to say "No" to ask for something else. No one is insisting you do anything.

Which is yet again putting women into a subservient role, of having their original request ignored/denied/misunderstood and having to ask nicely for an alternative. At the least, it’s inconvenient, at worst, it’s traumatising.

hugshelp Wed 30-Dec-20 19:13:38

I hear you doodledog and all the others that have engaged in good faith and engaged actual critical thought process.

Chewbacca Wed 30-Dec-20 19:08:34

For anyone who is worried about safe spaces for women I present this account

"Dear Women’s Organisations, We are women survivors of systemic male violence in all its forms. As you probably know, 98% of sexual offences and 80% of violent crimes are committed by males against females and not the reverse. We have suffered every kind of horror inflicted on our bodies and minds. For many of us we are battling every day with trauma symptoms. Speaking out is not easy for us and we respectfully ask that you listen. As you may be aware the government is considering changes to the Gender Recognition Act.
We are extremely concerned about these proposed changes which will allow any biological male to easily self-identify as a woman and will take away our fundamental right to natal female spaces. This would make it very difficult for you to refuse any male in women’s spaces even under the Equality Act exemptions. We are surprised that we, as survivors, are having to explain to you, women’s organisations, why we don’t want biological males in our spaces but we have no choice but to speak out in the face of a barrage of online verbal abuse, death threats and threats of male sexual torture.
1. We object to being made invisible as survivors of male violence. We object to our needs being disregarded and made less of a priority than those of trans people We are being put second in the following ways: a. We are being forced to submit to the transgender activist world view that a woman is a feeling in someone’s head, rather than a biological reality Please think about whether you honestly believe this and that women don’t experience biology based oppressions? If you don’t believe that woman is merely a feeling why are you validating this? Would you make a generic survivors group be from a Pagan or Muslim perspective to be inclusive of Pagan or Muslim women? If not why then make women and your whole service submit to a trans-activist world view? Pagan and Muslim women are not demanding this. No other oppressed group has demanded another group submit to their view of the world. Why is such a small group being prioritised to the point where women must sacrifice their sex based human rights?

We do not feel safe and mounting evidence shows we are not safe Women’s Aid motto is “Until Women and Children are Safe”. We do not feel safe having males in our spaces. If my rapist follows me you will ring 999. You will get the police to do safety checks on my welfare. If he comes near the refuge you will force me to leave there for my own safety and the safety of other women, yet if he puts on a dress and calls himself a woman you could welcome him into the refuge and call women bigots for objecting. Under the new law you may be forced to do this or at least you would find it very difficult to prevent. For some of us, our perpetrators were trans, at the time of abuse or transitioned later after abusing us."

Doodledog Wed 30-Dec-20 19:05:46

trisher

Doodledog I don't know how many times do I have to say it. You are always free to refuse, to withdraw, to say "No" to ask for something else. No one is insisting you do anything.

Unbelievable!

I have already addressed the inadequacy of this response more than once on this thread, but you just refuse to engage, and it is extremely wearing. You appear to be getting frustrated at the number of times you have repeated yourself, but you are doing so because you have not once engaged with the replies. The impression is that you scan responses for trigger words and then launch into a pre-prepared reply, but do not actually read what people are saying.

Again.
What if there is a language barrier, and the woman is unable to express her wish to have a different examiner?

What if she is young and lacks of confidence, or is worried about giving offence by asking if the rather masculine looking nurse is really a woman?

What if she has been raped and is suffering from PTSD?

What if she is not aware that she has a right to refuse?

What if she simply doesn't realise that the trans woman is not a biological female?

What if she is afraid that if she is not co-operative she will lose her room in the hostel and have to take her children back to the man who beat her?

It may well be the case that the law says that people have a right to refuse or withdraw from treatment or to ask in a police station for a different rape counsellor, or to leave a changing room in single sex swimming baths, or whatever, but that doesn't mean that it will always work like that. And why should women always be the ones to shuffle up and make space for men, just because they want us to?

hugshelp Wed 30-Dec-20 18:32:51

trisher and some people think that biology matters too

Whatever the belief you have no right to impose it on others. (especially when it's wrong anyway)

Iam64 Wed 30-Dec-20 18:32:49

half the male prisoners who declared themselves transgender were in prison for sexual offences

Denial isn't just a river in Egypt. There is a problem with men, men commit most violent and sexual offences. Referring to a few women who are "dominant" in women's refuges adds nothing to a serious discussion about the rights of women and girls being ridden roughshod by men. Like every other poster here, I've no issue with trans -my issue is with the aggressive men who want to dominate women's hard fought for spaces. The issue of trans men who say they're girls (at 60) or say the most difficult thing about being a woman is choosing what to wear is ludicrous and dismisses my experience as a 71 year old woman who lived my entire life female.

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 18:28:36

Doodledog I don't know how many times do I have to say it. You are always free to refuse, to withdraw, to say "No" to ask for something else. No one is insisting you do anything.

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 18:23:51

hugshelp there are a lot of people pontificating about what is happening who have little or no experience. I thought it might be reassuring to read the opinions of workers in the field, but if you don't want to know it's up to you.
Have I said I don't read links by the way? I may read them I don't comment on abuse, bile and inaccuracies.

trisher Wed 30-Dec-20 18:20:52

Hugshelp I didn't say the teeth actually showed anyone was a carnivore I said someone looked at them and said they believed the person was a carnivore. That's the whole point some people look at genitals and insist it means that person is the gender that is physically suggested and that the person must comply with their belief. Whatever the belief you have no right to impose it on others. (especially when it's wrong anyway)