The Argy Bargy Bar is back!

? that’s not fair Callistemon. We want to come too.
I’ve always wanted to sail the seven seas. Oh .....hang on a minute......I get sea sick ?

Too late, sorree

It's rather windy, sails are billowing, you really wouldn't like it Doodle.
I've got my sea bands on.

Those aren’t sea bands Callistemon they’re armbands for keeping you afloat. Come back safely.
grandmajet have you started cleaning the toilets yet. It will take about a week to get them ready again for Friday.
lisagran and ixion I think you should be our event co ordinators.
Wot we doin Friday ?

Uhum Uuhhumm scuse me. Please can I come in.
I've had my nose pressed up against the window for ages now and it's gone quite flat.......my nose that is ? . It looks so warm and inviting in there and I have so much missed being norty and the Christmas booze is all gone......?

happyme you are most welcome. We’re pretty quiet during the week but have a wild party nite on Friday’s.
Thor our barman will be happy to provide you with your tipple of choice.....and anything else you fancy, Our house special poteen is brewed in the cellar - hence the smell. Goodness knows what AGA is making it with this week.

I’ve been hanging round some undesirable toilets over the weekend to learn the job from the bottom up
????????

My plan is to kidnap Barry Scott with his Cillit Bang, and get him to help. Bang, and the dirt is gone. Shh!

Be careful, Happyme, it is lovely in here.......then they get you to do the worst jobs!

Sssh grandmajet don’t tell happyme that until after we’ve got her drunk on poteen ?

Yoohoo, I'm back. Thought last orders had been called when the blinds were down, didn't realise you were having a lock in. I love a lock in??....not to be confused with a lockdown??. Had to go home as a chilly wind was blowing up my nether regions. What a bummer.

Happyme the Argy never closes we just keep going till we fall asleep ?
Don’t put your nether regions near any of the llamas. We have 4 . They like to bite bums. The only time they stop is when AGA gives them poteen.
Talking of which, anyone seen AGA or is she in the cellar with Achilles?

Like to think I'm a team player grandmajet so feel I should volunteer to help you with the latrines BUT having seen them I should have worn my?not the ? . Maybe I would be better helping AGA with the ⚗, I could be poteen tester ?

Don’t worry Happyme. I’ve locked Barry Scott in there with his Cillit Bang. I’ll give it a final swill when he quietens down. Meanwhile, where’s that poteen..............

Not found the poteen but there is a strange 16 legged four headed creature snoring in the corner by the bar!!!! Is that AGA????

Similar happyme . I think you’ve found the llamas ?

Aagh, that explains the smell ?

I have been out for potatoes and met an old flame. We spent some time together talking about what we got up to years ago.

Talking is all the old bloke can do now but he did have some colour in his cheeks when the rough looking men from Carers are Us came to drag him away

Happyme I wish I did have 16 legs as I have to run up and down the cellar steps all day. Your help would be most welcome.
The llamas are a bit stinky. Doodle will give them a bath soon I hope?

Sorry for the absence, Bargyers.
Been feeling the after effects of the little prick that has been laying so many here so low.

I think, AGA, that we could do something useful for the community for a change.
Why don't we run a lunchtime session for the Old Folk. Call it something innocuous like the 'Cosy Caff'.
Plenty of drink and convivial company to while away an hour or two. It suits us, after all?. We could improve our takings during slack times.
Heaven forbid they get exposed to our raucous evenings....

Have you had a Circus Nite before?
If not, I'll get a move on sorting out some bare back tricks..
Let me know.

Oh you mean the Admiral ixion. What’s he been up to now.

Good ideas to bring in the punters. Better keep Lisagran out of the way when the oldies are her at lunchtime. In her outfits she could see a few of them off.

Circus nite sounds good.
I will dress up as a lion and frighten everyone.

Hurrah! Circus nite! Can you train the llamas to jump through a burning hoop, Doodle?

Cosy caff sounds good ixion. I think I can remember how to brew tea..circus night? Yes good idea.

Great!
I shall come as Pearl and her amazing palomino
Long time since my Pony Club heyday, but I am sure those skills will be very useful.
In the morning, I'll brave the dodgy end of the alley and try either Milko Mike or Terry the Totter to cadge a nag fine steed for my funny turn.
In the meantime, I'll make a start on my outfit. (BTW, in this weather, I might keep my Liberty bodice on underneath).

Thank you AGA, don't like to blow my own trumpet but I am well qualified......been to lots of poteen tasting nights ?.
Could brush up on my acrobatic skills for circus night, am real good at standing on one leg......not after the poteen tasting obv