Is this grounds for divorce?

paddyanne: I jokingly said to him that if he dies first I'll be quids in,I dont eat fillet steaks and smoked salmon and wash them down with nice wines and have a drawer full of chocolates and sweets and I dont have the heating set at 72 as it was on Monday .What will I do with all I save ?

Buy yourself a toyboy ??

That's okay kittylester give him a salad for tea while you tuck into a hot meal

You’re very restrained under great duress kitty. Maybe remove the hive app from his phone? If all else fails then yes, build a patio! . We don’t have a hive system but we do have a mobile thermostat which I can - and do - hide. Recommend it .

Before we changed to a new boiler with Hive controls, I used to hide the thermostat in the coldest room in the house, to teach my DH a lesson.

Installing the Hive, was the worst decision ever!!! He has it installed on every device he owns. (Then again, so have I ??)

It’s a man thing Kitty and probably hereditary/incurable.

In my parents’ house the only heating was a coal fire in the living room.
On Thursday nights my dad would go out to the pub to play dominoes with his pals and before going out at about 8 o’clock, would carefully turn the damper down on the fire which reduced the flow of air to the fuel and and thus lowered the flames and the room temperature.

It never failed to enrage my mum

I daren’t share this thread with Orlin, don’t want to give him any ideas re a hive.
He has a device in the kitchen which beeps when the electricity use increases and he goes around turning stuff off or lowering thermostats.
Our boys laugh fondly when I tell them these things, which just encourages him. Oh isn’t Dad cute.
Funnily he is the opposite in the car where he likes hot air blasting in his face, I think it’s cos he thinks it’s free heat there.
I imagine, like Orlin, MrKittyLester has other uses so I’d hold off on the divorce for now.

Friends had solar panels fitted.
He used to switch the washing machine off if the sun went behind the clouds as he didn't want to pay for the electricity ?️

kittylester, one mature student I taught wasn't allowed the heating on at all. She was from Thailand and her English husband turned off the gas when he wasn't at home!

Janeainsworth your story has reminded me of one of my favourite bits from The Royale Family

Jim, who is getting ready to go to the pub, says to Nana, 'get your coat on Nana'

She replies 'Ooh, are you taking me to The Feathers?'

And Jim says 'No, I'm turning the heating off'.

My SiL did this to DD on his stag do; he had a notification DD had turned it up. They're still happy together & I still have my reservations. She's the main home owner & bread winner ?

To be fair, he turned it back up after I whatsapped him.

Laura he does have other uses - he's really good at removing half eaten mice from behind the kitchen door and his eggy bread is really good.

he does have other uses - he's really good at removing half eaten mice from behind the kitchen door and his eggy bread is really good. . . Ha, ha - he’s a keeper then!

Not divorce but make him sleep in the dining room - with the heating off

If this is a constant thing where he deprives you of heating and it is unrealistic. Then it’s considered ‘ coercive control’.
That’s a fact from the ‘safe guarding adults’ course I attended whilst working for the NHS. Do you have other occasions or reasons.

NanaandGrampy The perfect implement would be a very sharp icicle, very cold. It can melt then within minutes. And would be appropriate in the circumstances

Nanaandgrampy is right...love a bit of Dahl!?.
My shackles,however, were up when I visualized him sitting in the sun! More than enough for a straight divorce.

On his way out to work my exDH used to turn the heating off because he wasn’t cold!
You’d need to establish an ongoing cause of unreasonable behaviour AND as a result the marriage had broken down irretrievably

Hetty58

kittylester, one mature student I taught wasn't allowed the heating on at all. She was from Thailand and her English husband turned off the gas when he wasn't at home!

That is abuse. I hope you advised the poor girl.

@doodledog

*Yes. Divorce him, then kill him grin.*

Ridiculous suggestion. You wouldn’t get any life assurance or inherit!

Hetty58

kittylester, one mature student I taught wasn't allowed the heating on at all. She was from Thailand and her English husband turned off the gas when he wasn't at home!

@hetty58

That isn’t funny. That is disturbing

HI,

Ops, it something I would have done sorry, I'm a put a jumper on dont put the heating up. We all have budgets to stick to.

Marydoll

Before we changed to a new boiler with Hive controls, I used to hide the thermostat in the coldest room in the house, to teach my DH a lesson.

Installing the Hive, was the worst decision ever!!! He has it installed on every device he owns. (Then again, so have I ??)

To teach him what?

Must be a DH thing, my husband wanders off upstairs and boosts the heating regularly, eventually I'm taking layers off, it would be much cheaper if he just put a jumper on, l look over and he's wearing a short sleeved t shirt, he says he doesn't like to be smothered in clothing. Different sort of smothering pops into my head ?

I'm so glad to live on my own. My ex had control of everything, I can do what the hell I want now. Make him stay in your car tonight, he'll soon want the heating on lol

I can’t help but laugh, I’ve just read it to my H who also laughed, he isn’t techy at all though so we would never have devices if it wasn’t for me. When we were first married a long time ago, we had the thermostat on the stairs, I turned it up when going up stairs, when he went up turned it down, never a word spoken and it still happens even now!